okkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk HANG ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN LISTEN UP GUYS....breathe in and then exhale....
ok yes hes an idiot we all agreed?
but I GOT SOME THINGS WRONG.....about the jeans...he didnt say that i misuderstood him. he said wear whatever as long as theres along top over it...and i AGREE WITH THAT......
ok secondly he never ORDERED BREAKFAST....he said he doesnt like my mum doing it cos shes ill, etc etc and why dont you help your mum more..he didnt say it in an offensive manner...but i didnt like it cos i dnt thinkits my dutyy to, but if mum is not well then why wake her up at 7am when i should really do it cos shes my mum, its less work for her...thats what he meant...although i said why dont you make it urself....thats when we had alil tiff, but hes calmed since and realised. i will not make excuses for him and i do what i want, i have compromised a little but i have made it clear im not a slave.....
and thirdly hes not LIVING OFF MY PARENTS..if it was up to him he would hsave moved but hes been here 2 years as a student first, it made sense he stay here we were not engaged then. we only got engaged and rishta happned 5 months ago....
ok sorted?
see you made everything better :]
now give it 2 more days & you'll come up with a different problem
see you made everything better :]
now give it 2 more days & you'll come up with a different problem
lol im ready :]
AWW cmon this is a serious issue for me...
but either way im keeping you guys entertained....but serously its no laughing matter maybe in written format it sounds pathetic but when these are happening something small can seem alarmingly huge
but either way im keeping you guys entertained....but serously its no laughing matter maybe in written format it sounds pathetic but when these are happening something small can seem alarmingly huge
Oh there you are. I was wondering where you had disappeared, lol. You've received A LOT of great advice from everyone. So, has it helped in any way or given you some insight/idea on how to handle things? Just curious.....before you start another thread as Waterfall mentioned. LOL.
i just did....lol.lol but hey thats what its here for like i said I TALK TOOO MUCH ...AND SINCE I CANT TALK TO YOU GUYS PERSONALLY.....these questions are gna be here, there and everywhere.
okkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk HANG ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN LISTEN UP GUYS....breathe in and then exhale....
ok yes hes an idiot we all agreed?
but I GOT SOME THINGS WRONG.....about the jeans...he didnt say that i misuderstood him. he said wear whatever as long as theres along top over it...and i AGREE WITH THAT......
ok secondly he never ORDERED BREAKFAST....he said he doesnt like my mum doing it cos shes ill, etc etc and why dont you help your mum more..he didnt say it in an offensive manner...but i didnt like it cos i dnt thinkits my dutyy to, but if mum is not well then why wake her up at 7am when i should really do it cos shes my mum, its less work for her...thats what he meant...although i said why dont you make it urself....thats when we had alil tiff, but hes calmed since and realised. i will not make excuses for him and i do what i want, i have compromised a little but i have made it clear im not a slave.....
and thirdly hes not LIVING OFF MY PARENTS..if it was up to him he would hsave moved but hes been here 2 years as a student first, it made sense he stay here we were not engaged then. we only got engaged and rishta happned 5 months ago....
ok sorted?
in that case u r making out a villian of him for nothing when u r the one misunderstanding n mocking ur fiance.wat if he reads all these mails ???
in that case u r making out a villian of him for nothing when u r the one misunderstanding n mocking ur fiance.wat if he reads all these mails ???
uffff! first you have to understand how nadz's head processes things.
okay, let me tell you this...
She first writes up the issue she had. Most of the time it is one sided thinking.... BUT do not underestimate her! She realizes what was wrong, and what happened, and all that while people throw tomatoes on her.
So in the end, she learns and finds out if she has to work on something or her fiance!
Simple. Let the girl write all she wants. Even her fiance would soon find out and say THANK GOD FOR GS - I am able to sort out things before marriage :)
Nadz, go back to your VERY FIRST post on THIS THREAD and** READ IT**.
You NEVER told us that your mom was ill. And you NEVER told us that he told you to cook breakfast so that it would be less of a burden for your mom.
The information you have recently provided changes everything. You should help out your mom with chores if she's ill. And your husband needs to understand that household duties are not always and only confined to the wife....but can be shared by a husband. He needs to be flexible regarding his views about roles in a marriage.
You can potentially hurt your relationship with your fiance by running to complain about every little issue. You need to sit down, relax, think thoroughly about all sides of the issue. And by doing this, you might realize that the other person (your fiance) is not trying to be the bad guy.
uffff! first you have to understand how nadz's head processes things.
okay, let me tell you this...
She first writes up the issue she had. Most of the time it is one sided thinking.... BUT do not underestimate her! She realizes what was wrong, and what happened, and all that while people throw tomatoes on her.
So in the end, she learns and finds out if she has to work on something or her fiance!
Simple. Let the girl write all she wants. Even her fiance would soon find out and say THANK GOD FOR GS - I am able to sort out things before marriage :)
i'm seriously wishing he somehow reads all these posts n then she'll realize whose the idiot.immature girl,too young for marriage
When we get worked up over things, you can forget details.
Nadz.......it seems like you love your fiance. After all, you wouldn't be so concerned with the possibility of strangers thinking ill of him. Just don't jump to conclusions. Look at an issue from all sides (including his pov) and discuss with him. It's sweet that he's considerate of your mom's health.
^Hmmm, I don't think she's unreasonably young for marriage. She's done with her studies. And she has her Masters, so she's in her twenties. Maybe not in her really early twenties, but definitely not a teenager either.
I think she's just nervous about the change that a marriage can bring. And she just has to learn to calm down, breathe, pick and choose her battles wisely, and learn to communicate various angles gently. And it takes time to develop these skills.
hmmm RV but sometimes adults also act likes kids...or may be she is living in UK..and as she said before she dont know anything about pakistan or desi culture...
many other peoples who live in UK or USA they fallow their desi culture...they know A to Z about everything ( desi culture )....but i think everything is new for her...that's why she is confuse...but once she will ger marirage she will able to understand life / relationships after marriage....like a kid who is very scare to go school but then he get used to....even if he is not good in studies and dont want to go.... but he know that he have to go everyday school b'coz it's his part of life now ....
so im sure she will able to hadle/understand everything soon Insha'ALLAH..wishing her Good Luck
^ adding to that. It takes time for anyone to adjust to a marriage to a new relationship. Nothing to do with what background you have.
Add to that, our desi duties or whatever you may call them, it can get all a bit confusing.
I grew up in OZ and I knew a lot about our culture.. only after marriage i found what was relevant and what was not.
She's not too young for marriage or is childish. These are concerns a lot of people have, especually if you have lived a very independant life.
Sure you shouldnt discuss every problem and every problem is not really a problem. But oh well... we live and learn and she will too.
All we can do is, be positive and maybe tell her how we dealt with things. Or bad we dealt and how we could have dealt with them better.. i dunno. She's seeking advice, not badmouthing
^ u r right...and we are here to give her advice and help her...but i think sometimes we have to show to peoples that in some points they are wrong....like RV said she didnt mention in her first post that her mom was ill and her fiancee never force her...
so we have to correct her at some point..that doesn't means we are critcizing her...as u say we live we learn....
