Stuff you can't do living with in-laws:
-cuddling on the couch and watching a movie (nope you have to go to your room and even then they'll be like 'humaray saath gul mil nahi rahi')
-leaving the dishes in the sink and deciding to wash them tomorrow (it seems like you're leaving them for her)
-skip making dinner and just eat mcdonald's drive thru
-walk around in your benyan
-Have your house be a judgment free zone!!
It is a short lived dream even if you are living away from your in laws when your kids are born you do not want to cuddle in front of them or walk around in your benyan , also you do not want to teach them laziness or feed them junk food.
actually when we got engaged we decided to live in seprate home after wedding even my inlaws was fine this thing but things changed..situation changed my sisters in laws got married and moved. one unmarried sis in law went to dubai for some job..my jeth got expired ad her wife went to her parents..my dewar got a nice job in lahore he moved there with family..another jeth bought a home and moved there so my hubby left in home...so he said how can i leave my parents...
in addition as their two beloved sons left them they dont wanat lose this son....they are grabing him hard and brain washing him...
actually i dunno what problem i have...actually living with some one is hard u need to care about their feelings their comfort..
if u wana sleep late or u like to sleep latee...or u wana go out but u cant go or u need to take yr inlws with u ...if u dont wana clean dishes ,clean home for a while wana do later..but they want that their super bahu do all at that time...if u wana eat mutton and they wana make chicken for lunch..
if u wana watch tv in your bedroom but u have to sit in louge with yr inlaws as yr inlaws dont feel lonely..
u bought some thing for u i mean eatable things but u have to share with your inlaws
and list is on.....
If he doesn't want to leave his parents he can still get a seperate house and have his parents live with u in your house, totally changes the dynamics imo cos it will be ur roof so (hopefully) more ur way of living. I know this is what a lot of Arab couples do, wife can still have all her private space but elderly parents are not left to fend for themselves. They are more likely to let u get on with life, how u want to dress, eating out at restaurants just u and hubby etc. all the stuff couples should be able to do..
now your parents inlaws are left alone and ur husband is the only one to take care of them but his wife doesnt want to
because she
wana sleep late wana go out
**dont wana clean the dishes **
**dont feel like taking care of anyone **
**wana watch tv in the bedroom **
**wana eat mutton **
**dont wana share eatable things **
masallah masallah … i jst hope wat goes around doesnt come around for u :no:
he promised you your separate place but his situation has changed.if this is all based on misgivings then give it a try but keep your options open. marriage is a compromise in many things.
Look at Ashwaiyria shes living with her inlaws so can u Suhaina.just think it this way that when u r little u hav to live with ur parents n siblings whether u like them or not same with inlaws u hav to live with them n make it possible in any way u can.think of no way out that will make u more compromising.
giv ur hubby some time n space to think abt this idea of moving out.its just not gonna be any easy step for him or other family members.mostly when girls r married in a joint family it takes a good 5-10 yrs b4 they move out.so just hang on n be patient.
ash lives in a separate building next to her inlaws...also..i doubt she is expected to cook, clean, and pick after everyone in the house....but thats besides the point...filmy families and regular families have different issues...and deal with them differently...i am sure your inlaws will not take you kissing and hugging "paraya" mard... well.....so lets not compare filmistan bahus with the thread opener.. :)
if you knew you were going to be living with inlaws before you got married..or engaged..and were ok with it then...you are technically expected to be ok with it now...unless something horrible has happened since then.... (??) whats the root of your complaint?
Someone mentioned above - on not being able to cuddle on the sofa and all that crap - in front of in-laws...
come on get real! Those cuddling days are always before marriage and first few months after marriage. Then GET REAL! who really cuddles?
It's over rated. You just wanna do it cause your in-laws are there. Otherwise you would sit on one FAR END of the sofa and your hubby on the OTHER FAR END - hehe)
(...or am I missing out on something? Me wanna kry too much now.. if couples still cuddle long long long long after marriage. pls let me know people).
first of all... how many times do u even get to cuddle each other when u have the kids around, got work, got household chores to take care of? like really??
and about getting something to eat from outsite and not wanting to share it with the inlaws.... now thats a winner!
They raised their son their entire life - and then as soon as the new wife comes in they gotta separate? What gives?
(Of course it's understood (with ignorance) that the girl who left her parents home - who raised her till that day - ignoring that - cause it's ASS-U-ME-D that "her brother" the son of the family will support the girls parents) .. so she is "getting" a "replacement" of her in her brothers wife to her parents.
^Did you understand any of that? Caus I know what I am talking about !
first of all... how many times do u even get to cuddle each other when u have the kids around, got work, got household chores to take care of? like really??
and about getting something to eat from outsite and not wanting to share it with the inlaws.... now thats a winner!
Hehe ditto. All Saas arent that bad. Some actually go out and get stuff that YOU would like to eat....
