u dont wana live with your inlaws and want your seprate house but but u have to live with them then how u will cope this situation?
just go with the flow! try to gain some sort of independance urself
Have quite a few kids and that way the house will be too small for your family :) - Inlaws will ask you themselves to move out.
Jeez Im bright :P
Re: inlaws problem
For those who are lecturing this poor grl on staying with her in-laws....doesnt she have the right to have her OWN place....how abt all u girls ask this question to urselves? dont we all wanna decorate our houses the way we want, have parties, gatherings...etc...These things are not possible when one lives with her in-laws becuase the FIL/MIL have thier own living style and the bahu has to adjust according to their living styles....American culture is so much better in this matter.
and about getting something to eat from outside and not wanting to share it with the inlaws.... now thats a winner!
yeah that would be really bad! but i didn't mean that... I meant you can't cook according to your own preferences. want to have sushi? mexican? a light salad? Sorry...most in-laws are gonna want something with a gallon of shan masala in it...everyday! ugh
For those who are lecturing this poor grl on staying with her in-laws....doesnt she have the right to have her OWN place....how abt all u girls ask this question to urselves? dont we all wanna decorate our houses the way we want, have parties, gatherings...etc...These things are not possible when one lives with her in-laws becuase the FIL/MIL have thier own living style and the bahu has to adjust according to their living styles....American culture is so much better in this matter.
Oh man, I never even thought of this! I've never been able to have my friends over at my house because our living space isn't that big and my parents are always around. Plus later they always have commentary, like "you were so hyper", "you didn't ask her if she wants drink" or whatever. They're really nice, like they start making chai and pakoray, but that just freaks my friends out. And these are my feelings around my own dear parents. so imagine how weird it's gonna be around my in-laws. :( Well I agree with your post, another thing to add on the things i fear about living with in-laws lol.
^phew i still got cuddle time
yup just 1 year left--then you shall be banished to the other couch :)
oh my god, how dare you ask for a seperate living place? that’s like the biggest sin EVER!!! how can you or your inlaws ever live in different homes?? how dare you take away their precious son from them? how dare you want to have your own privacy and cuddle with your husband and have privacy with him. after all, you’re a married woman now, don’t you know you have no rights anymore? so what if islam gives you full rights to live seperately if you want to? who cares!!
if you want a seperate place, i say you go for it. it’s your life, and islamically you have ALL the rights to live alone with your husband if you wish to. this cultural nonsense gets on my nerves where everyone starts with their hoo haa as soon as the bahu wants to move out.. omg, how can you ever take the son away. i mean yes you guys will still get to see your inlaws regularly but OMG, how dare you take him away. jeez. if you’re not comfortable, if you want more privacy, talk to your husband and make a decision. you dont HAVE to live with your susraal if you don’t want to and they need to comprehend that. i think that if you’re used to being independent and making your own judgements, it’s better to live seperately and be cordial with your inlaws rather than living under the same roof with constant jhik jhik everyday.
and njmasti, there are many, many couples who do cuddle, yes even after 5 years of their marriage and there’s nothing wrong with that. not everyone gets boring after being married for years, people don’t have to throw their lives or the fun away just because so much time has passed and kids are now in the picture.
ash lives in a separate building next to her inlaws...also..i doubt she is expected to cook, clean, and pick after everyone in the house....but thats besides the point...filmy families and regular families have different issues...and deal with them differently...i am sure your inlaws will not take you kissing and hugging "paraya" mard... well.....so lets not compare filmistan bahus with the thread opener.. :)
if you knew you were going to be living with inlaws before you got married..or engaged..and were ok with it then...you are technically expected to be ok with it now...unless something horrible has happened since then.... (??) whats the root of your complaint?
thank you! unless suhaina is also a jetsetting multi millionaire whos inlaws cannot dare boss her around or tell her to start cleaning, cooking and all that jazz. let's get real.. aishwarya lives like maybe 2 days in an entire month with her inlaws. and when their entire family is always out or traveling for work, how does it even matter that she lives with them? they live in a mansion first of all, and im sure the family can afford an army of servants to do everything.
suhaina if you want to stay ina happily married relationship for all your life then YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE INLAWS< CARE ABOUT THEM AND RESPECT THEM LIKE YOU WOULD YOUR OWN PARENTS. it is not easy but our culture demands this of women. and if you deviate fromt his and cause a fuss about it you might risk losing your marriage.
post marriage girls in our culture have to have patience to bardash any annoyances. life is full of annoyances. try not to have selfish thinking. if you ignore minor stuff that in annoys you now in the long run you will be happier.
Re: inlaws problem
hmm
and about aishwaria ...i dont think she wash cloths,she clean house,she cooks,.....
if she gift,or sit with inlaws for some time or eta with them..its nota big deal
we r normal humans...we r not filmi heroins...
whta she do she wears cloths,sit infront of make up artisht and a hair artist and then went to some party,inuration,festival,award ,other country or to sum movie shoot.....
Re: inlaws problem
well since everyone is after ash.i think i might defend the poor gal as she won't be able to do so:)
well i care less for ash n how she lives.my point was shes a celeb n can easily afford to live alone.still she chooses not tojust for her husband's sake.there were rumors shes separating from in-laws n she said no she loves to be around family and knows it importance and since abhishek took care of her sick dad like a son she'll stay with his family like a daughter..
how many servants she has, how huge her house is ,is not the question here.the point is even if u r extremely rich n doesn't hav to cook or clean only living with ur parents spouse can be demanding n uncomfortable at points.n don't forget if shes a celeb her fil is even bigger star so it can't be easy to live around big b.
as for she sits prettty,attends parties n has nothing else to do i'll say "dore k dhole suhanay".they r still humans n hav to face all the same challenges of relationship as others plus the challenges of their hi profile professional live with media chasing them everywhere they go.being extra busy and famous makes it even extra difficult to keep the balance b/w relations n keep everyone happy.i'm sure celebs also wish they can live like ordinary ppl n ordinary girls.
n yes suhaina my point was exactly that we r normal ppl n if celebs can do wat normal ppl does why can't u do same? plus u hav no other option as ur husband is not willing to live away from his parents.so u hav to think of ways to compromise n fit in this situation.unless u wanna leave him for this reason.