Getting married at the tender age of 18 & 16, in this current society which builds an unwanted pressure on parents who want a girl from a well off family & the opposite party looking for a well paid handsome son, is not very easy.
Incest is a pure sign of a failing culture. A culture made impure by Xcessive media. Let me be specific that media can be in any form - electronic & paper. The brain learns what it can see, not what it can hear. We see gorgeous chicks on da net & baywatch & then we r lost in a fantasy of our own. Desi culture is nothing but a bunch of crap. They consist of self proclaimed good muslims, modern muslims & fanatics.
An incident in Islamabad which I'm about 2 relate was published in an English newspaper 2 yrz back....I've summarized this incident.
A 19 yr boy after surfing Xcessive porn sites decided 2 kick the bucket with his sister when they were all alone. Their parents were out for some reason. The girl became pregnant & the parents were in a dilemna.
The newspapers blamed the internet....Who do u blame....parents, media or da children....?
I've already said its da media....Parents should alwayz be in control over the child on what he/she can watch & how much of TV/Internet hours should be allowed....!
[QUOTE] Originally posted by mal1k: *
Getting married at the tender age of 18 & 16, in this current society which builds an unwanted pressure on parents who want a girl from a well off family & the opposite party looking for a well paid handsome son, is **not* very easy.
Incest is a pure sign of a failing culture. A culture made impure by Xcessive media. Let me be specific that media can be in any form - electronic & paper. The brain learns what it can see, not what it can hear. We see gorgeous chicks on da net & baywatch & then we r lost in a fantasy of our own. Desi culture is nothing but a bunch of crap. They consist of self proclaimed good muslims, modern muslims & fanatics.
An incident in Islamabad which I'm about 2 relate was published in an English newspaper 2 yrz back....I've summarized this incident.
A 19 yr boy after surfing Xcessive porn sites decided 2 kick the bucket with his sister when they were all alone. Their parents were out for some reason. The girl became pregnant & the parents were in a dilemna.
The newspapers blamed the internet....Who do u blame....parents, media or da children....?
I've already said its da media....Parents should alwayz be in control over the child on what he/she can watch & how much of TV/Internet hours should be allowed....!
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i dont think there isnt any guy who doesnt visit porn sites, but that doesnt mean u go and sleep with ur own sister, thats pretty disgusting, and i dont think it has gotta do with the internet its with the mentality of that sick person, it definately shows that in some way it was presented to him when he was being brought up that its okay to be with ur siblings like that...
i dont think there isnt any guy who doesnt visit porn sites, but that doesnt mean u go and sleep with ur own sister, thats pretty disgusting, and i dont think it has gotta do with the internet its with the mentality of that sick person,
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I agree with you to this extent. Later part of your reply is debatable!
[QUOTE] Originally posted by mal1k: *
Getting married at the tender age of 18 & 16, in this current society which builds an unwanted pressure on parents who want a girl from a well off family & the opposite party looking for a well paid handsome son, is **not* very easy.
SO DONT U THINK DUDE !! ITS SIMPLY A BUSSINESS DEAL , NOT A MARRIAGE BY ANY DEFINITION.......
SO I AGAIN SUGGEST !! WHY DONT WE LOOK FOR OUR ANSWERS THROUGH ISLAM ?? LET ME SAY ISLAM IS NOT A RELIGION LIKE CHRISTAINITY OR JEWISM OR ANY OTHER IN WHICH CHANGES R MADE ON THE BASIS OF WISH AND WILL. HENCE PARTLY FOLLOWING ISLAM AND DISCARDING REST WAT WE DONT LIKE , IS NOT BIENG A MUSLIM..........
SO MARRYING A MAN IN AGE OF 16 AND A GUL IN AGE OF 18 AND STRICTLY FOLLOWING THE CODE OF HIJAAB CAN ONLY PREVENT THESE PROBLEMS TO FLORISH IN A SOCIETY......
^ All the so called muslim states these days are at the rock bottom interms of literacy. Pakistan has a litracy rate of 55 % for males and 29% for females and mind you that includes any one who can simply read his/her name. In terms of their intellectual levels, muslim states are atleast a few hundred years behind their westren counterparts. Even if we tried we couldnt possibly understand the complexities of a system suggested by islam. A lot of interpretation would be needed and a lot of thought would have to be given. Currently muslims are only good for one thing, opposing anything that has westren origins. we are blind and stupid, we are worthless... we need to learn "islam" from the west.
west is ahead because its more islamic, think about it.
(p.s. using CAPS doesnt make a person's argument more weighty)
But sadly both our faith and culture allow it-in that marrying your 1st cousins is allowed. That is as bad as having your sister. I'm sorry buty that practice is gross and we need to as both a faith community edit that bit out, and as a culture make it a negative.
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*Originally posted by Gamma Dilation: *
^ morals are dictated by your society. In paki society its permissible to marry a cousin and is even prefered and not considered incest.
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well it shld be...u are apart of the same gene pool aren't u?
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Well there is big difference b/w "your brother" and "your cousin". Your brother is your mahrum and you are not allowed to have a relationship with your mehrum whereas your cousin is non-mehrum. So there is nothing gross in marrying a cousin in islam.
Well there is big difference b/w "your brother" and "your cousin". Your brother is your mahrum and you are not allowed to have a relationship with your mehrum whereas your cousin is non-mehrum. So there is nothing gross in marrying a cousin in islam.
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Islam needs modernizing. Laws made for a society of 1400 yrs ago are not uniformaly appliable now.
Islam needs modernizing. Laws made for a society of 1400 yrs ago are not uniformaly appliable now.
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Before someone else badgers you, how sure are you that Islam needs to evolve with time changing its scriptures. Hmm...then again, how about you do the honours by starting a thread in religion forum with your statement and we can have a healthy dialogue there : )
No one mentioned chaninging the scriptures, astagfurallah, but reinterprting them.
For ionstance, we are told to dress modestly:
This doesnt have to be chador or parada. It can be loose fitting trousers, with a baggy t-shirt and a baseball cap. Girls would be fully covered and decent in that.
^ i knowing what you u saying. No need to putting burka. wear clothes that covering butt and breates then it being fine.
I disagree with Gamma, bad topic. Little people doing with parents why mentioning it here. Not good. This making more people to do with parents, uncle, aunty , pets so on and forth.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by arshadalii23: *
SO MARRYING A MAN IN AGE OF 16 AND A GUL IN AGE OF 18 AND STRICTLY FOLLOWING THE CODE OF HIJAAB CAN ONLY PREVENT THESE PROBLEMS TO FLORISH IN A SOCIETY......
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how do u figure that? hijab prevents these problems? thats a brave assumption... do u know how many hijabans in Indonesia and Malaysia are mothers before marriage... and most at the tender age of about 16-18... do u know how many hijabans are prostitutes?? in a culture were women are suppressed and dont get the education needed... u have problems like this...
wake up.. hijab is not the anwser to these problems... knowledge and education is....
I am an American Pakistani Psychiatrist practising in USA. Previously I worked in Pakistan. I feel this is an important topic which should be analyzed carefuly. It can elicit knee jerk responses and also thoughtful debate. Every day I see many women who present to me with long standing history of self mutilation, chaotic relationships, depression and pervasive pattern of going from one abuser to another abuser. Now I can l have diagnostic impression about majority of these unfortunate ones without seeing their chart. They are victims of incest and childhood abuse. Of course it happens to men as well but statistical their proportion is much less. What causes this to happen in first place. This is debatable. But two factors are commonly observed the adult who is offendor, at the time of this crime is usually intoxicated with inhibition lowered and child is vulnerable may be absence of protecting adults or scant clothings. In an eastren /Islamic culture in close knit families these two important factors are usually not prevelant. However childhood abuse and incest is grossly under reported. And usually a girl is considered the culprit or is husshed up prevent dishonor to her and family. Parents are forced to keep quiet because no one will marry their damaged daughter. I will write more on this topic in near future.
