-so I understand that us pakistanis believe that gays are the scum of the earth so what am i to do. -let me start by saying, it is not a choice. i can remember liking boys back when i was three years of age and over the years it has not changed, i'm in my 20's now. -Here are the reasons I will not marry a girl: 1) it will not be fair for the girl 2) most of my family already has an idea that girls don't really appeal to me so it would be extremely awkward being with a girl knowing that my family knows that i have a thing for boys -my family and i live in north america and we aren't the most religious family, but we are pakistani -plz don't recite the Quran to me, yes i know what it says about homosexuality -Don't think that suicide hasn't crossed my mind. me killing myself would be more damaging to my family then me telling them i'm gay -plz, i want to hear what you have to say about pakistanis being gay
There is nothing haram about your feelings, because it's not your fault. Allah gave you those feelings. As long as you don't do something unIslamic, something haram with your feelings, everything is oké.
You have to make sure you don't do something you aren't allowed to, and everything will be fine. You will have to accept the fact, that life for you will never be like everyone elses. Eventually you will find strength and happiness in your life in your own way. I certainly hope so. :)
They once showed a documentary here about Gay Muslims. They have their own helpservice. Perhaps you could find something like that where you live. I think they know probably much better what to do and how to handle everything and maybe you'll meet someone in a similar situation. It helps to talk to people who really understand you.
And if other Pakistanis make issues out of your gay feelings, then ask them, if they were ever attracted to someone they weren't supposed to be attracted to, like a non-mehram for example. If they are honest, they will say yes, most people have before or even after marriage once or perhaps a few times been attracted to someone they shouldn't have been attracted to. But as long as they fight it and don't do anything unIslamic with those feelings, it's oké. Allah gives everyone all kinds of negative and positive feelings, but it's our actions, what we do with those feelings, that's really important I think.