If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

[MIAinVA]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

Ok, so another question now as I'm reading your responses.

So lets say there's a very decent lady who's married to an okay guy (he's nothing great, but she's content with him) and then lets say she gets to know this guy (at a socail daawat, class or work, or whatever) and starts liking him and lets says she think oh, I wish I had met him before I got married cuz he fits her ideal but thats not possible now, so she doesn't pursue anything and just remains as an acquaintance/friend with him. No meeting, no lunches, just hello hi when they happen to meet socially.

So would that be cheating in your dictionary? Men and women both answer please.

[BarbieCue]

@PyariCgudia

Yeah well once he is not able to treat the two women equally and he has hurt another human being ie. his first wife and his kids from her by doing what he has done, then he is answerable to God for that. Not sure about you, but I’d rather not have to face God for screwing up someone’s life because I’m some pervert.

PCG thanks for reminding them they ***will ***have to face God one day. They are now responsible for their own actions. Bye guys

[Mirch]

@TLK

Wf he is man enough to go and marry another person, he should have the back bone to come and tell his first wife so she can decide whether she wants to live with him or not. She has every right to leave her hubby if she is not in agreement with the arrangement.

There are certain condition a women can file for KHula , her husband marrying a second wife is not one of them

@X2

plus havent you seen expectations from many ladies on GS that a husband should work fulltime and then come home and split household chores with them 50/50 and that they really dont like cooking. connect that to the fact that he has to treat all equally, so here is the situation this guy will be under

go to work 7 days…hey expenses are high, come home 1, (4 condos in same bldg) start cooking run to house 2 start cooking, run to house 3 start cooking run to house 4 start cooking, clean house 4, clean house 3, clean house 2, clean house 1, feed the wife, go to house 2 feed the wife, go to house 3 feed the wife, go to house 4 feed the wife.

and then run to his second job…

pagal kuttay nay kata hai?

LOL , I can remember many cartoons I watch depicting that scenerio

@Guac

maybe i shouldn’t blindly take in everything people write here

Yep. Do not leave everything onto mullah. You need to gain your own knowledge.

@Iconoclast

Mirch Bhai
Even if had not opened this thread we new you are looking at other women.

No I walk on the road and drive my car with closed eyes.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

BTW.

Quick question. How many of you "mard" would be ok if your dad went out and brought in another woman when you were growing up?

Would you slice his privates in axial or longitudinal cross-sections and serve it to the neighborhood dog or cat?

[MixedBeauty]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

What pcg said was right. If you cant treat them equally your not allowed. Actually and also can some1 clarify for each tear that ur wife crys over you, You get punished? Tru false?

[MixedBeauty]

BTW.

Quick question. How many of you "mard" would be ok if your dad went out and brought in another woman when you were growing up?

Would you slice his privates in axial or longitudinal cross-sections and serve it to the neighborhood dog or cat?

Well my ex bf his dad has 2 wives, and i often question'd him about it etc, And he wud reply saying 'and what my dads a playa'

Ummm ok. Thats your mum you dumb @%!*

[Mirch]

@TLK

There was a time when there was only one Lorena Bobbit. Now we have a clan with that name.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

@TLK

we treat you with respect no matter how dumb you appear ..

appear is redundant here : Just kidding.

[X2]

BTW.

Quick question. How many of you "mard" would be ok if your dad went out and brought in another woman when you were growing up?

Would you slice his privates in axial or longitudinal cross-sections and serve it to the neighborhood dog or cat?

so what are you saying, so if some guy was a child when his dad got another woman, and the kid did not slice his dads privates he is not a 'man' when he grows up?

just trying to understand the logic here.

[queer]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

again notice how pcg initiates the "if your dad" situation.

and a few posts later, cant take the heat.

[X2]

Well my ex bf his dad has 2 wives, and i often question'd him about it etc, And he wud reply saying 'and what my dads a playa'

Ummm ok. Thats your mum you dumb @%!*

what did u want him to say? dads a jerk, and get worked up about it, start crying and cursing? or have a special moment telling you about his inner conflicts of love and hate for his father..?

or just play it off and not get fixated on it even if it is tough for him? sometimes guys dont open up because its easier to just let it be.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

I think my Q is prettty clear. Your choice to answer from your own personal perspective.

[PyariCgudia]

what did u want him to say? dads a jerk, and get worked up about it, start crying and cursing? or have a special moment telling you about his inner conflicts of love and hate for his father..?

or just play it off and not get fixated on it even if it is tough for him? sometimes guys dont open up because its easier to just let it be.

Why ever would God want a child to feel that way?

[X2]

Ok, so another question now as I'm reading your responses.

So lets say there's a very decent lady who's married to an okay guy (he's nothing great, but she's content with him) and then lets say she gets to know this guy (at a socail daawat, class or work, or whatever) and starts liking him and lets says she think oh, I wish I had met him before I got married cuz he fits her ideal but thats not possible now, so she doesn't pursue anything and just remains as an acquaintance/friend with him. No meeting, no lunches, just hello hi when they happen to meet socially.

So would that be cheating in your dictionary? Men and women both answer please.

thoughts are one thing, actions another, if the motivation is just to stay a fried, I see nothing wrong with it.

[X2]

Why ever would God want a child to feel that way?

dunno, I am currently not a god, so cant tell you stuff from a divine perspective. but really appreciate the high regards you have for me. I am flattered.

[MIAinVA]

Well so to the poster, IMHO, it IS cheating if he is deliberately looking for another woman for the purpose of marriage... "Oh I'm bored with this one, lets find another one".

Its another story altogether if he is not looking but "falls in love" as most people claim happened (I cannot fathom how) and until and unless he actually gets involved emotionally and/or physically.... its not cheating. If he just happens to like some girl, and then says no, I'm a married man, good for him... thats not cheating.

So yeah X2 I agree with you.... as you said its all about the neeyat :)

[PyariCgudia]

Re: If a married Muslim man seeing some other woman.

what about that question fools you into thinking i have high regards for you?

[funguy]

Ono lunches, just hello hi when they happen to meet socially.

So would that be cheating in your dictionary? Men and women both answer please.

Just do tiffin lunches and eat them together in the company cafeteria by the vending machines. You would not be "going out to lunches" and thus it is permisible per peer saab.

[PyariCgudia]

Well so to the poster, IMHO, it IS cheating if he is deliberately looking for another woman for the purpose of marriage... "Oh I'm bored with this one, lets find another one".

Its another story altogether if he is not looking but "falls in love" as most people claim happened (I cannot fathom how) and until and unless he actually gets involved emotionally and/or physically.... its not cheating. If he just happens to like some girl, and then says no, I'm a married man, good for him... thats not cheating.

So yeah X2 I agree with you.... as you said its all about the neeyat :)

That's why I find it so weird that in a very burqa-clad culture, like saudi or afghanistan, how people find multiple spouses. You could not have possibly found her at a hookah bar, so how did you meet the second ms. burqa wali, and the third ms. burqa wali?

[X2]

So yeah X2 I agree with you.... as you said its all about the neeyat :)

I will add to it though, if your niyaat is fine but your significant other feels uneasy, you can either have them be on the same page as you or decrease interactions with the person your siginficant other has some issue with. yes i know as adults we should not have hangups, complexes, jealousy etc, but its is there and sometimes it is easier to think of what is more important and what is not.

[maroush]

@Mirch

Is he cheating or looking for a second wife ? After all Muslim men are allowed to have 4 wives .

Disclaimer: It is a hypothetical question. I am not seeing someone.

If he is only “window shopping” then is that still classified as cheating? He’s not actually doing the deed…

Or is he?

I’ve lost count of the amount of times i’ve said this - “each to his own”.

Having said that, if i was in that position, i would hope that he would have the decency to tell me first. If not, to hell with him! As long as he is there for my children, is a prominent father figure and supports them, then fine by me.

I’d hate him, yes. I’d be broken, yes. Would i seek revenge of some sort? In the heat of the moment, most probably. But i would hope that i would pick myself up and carry on with life. My children are my life. I live and breathe for them. Husbands can come and go as they please for all i care.

(If you’re reading Mr Maroush, i heart thee )