I Regret....

[Fbi786]

@sweetdoll

can’t anyone tell me of some effective wazeefa or dua that he comes back to me?..

SOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THIS BEFORE ..GETTING A DIVORCE

now this thread has become a joke .. am not even gona comment further ..

for goodness sake .. a youtube ..as islamic proof .. what is this world comeing to

[sweetdoll]

@queer

wait until you grow up a bit emotionally, and can think like an adult? and enjoy the experience while you are at it. there's a lot more to life than getting married (no matter what you read in the idiotic wedding forum over here).

y do u think am being immature??? what do u advise me???u aint giving any suggestion to my questionz..

[sweetdoll]

@lipstick

how old are u? u dont sound mature enough to deal with a marriage. ur actually asking a bunch of strangers what shud i do now? this is ur marriage ur talking about. u should know for urself what u want

i know what i want...but i dunno how to get it(him)..

[lipstick]

Re: I Regret....

my advice to u is leave it and get on with ur life. ur not mature enough to be married. ur asking ppl what can u do to make him contact u first? seriously??

[queer]

Re: I Regret....

i can give you a taweez you'll have to tie it around his hip when he's asleep. next day he'll call you. 50 bucks cash only.

[sweetdoll]

@lipstick

my advice to u is leave it and get on with ur life. ur not mature enough to be married. ur asking ppl what can u do to make him contact u first? seriously??

**
whats so strange about it??? is that so impossible??:(**

[sweetdoll]

@queer

i can give you a taweez you'll have to tie it around his hip when he's asleep. next day he'll call you. 50 bucks cash only.

not funny

[Iconoclast]

@fbi786

you think talaq is a joke or something .. that you can keep going back and back and more back .. with out having to remarry …

arey if this is your research on this particular topic .. i seriously suggest that you do some more research .. *btw, am talking in terms of Sunni perspective, that after 3 months of iddat .. a halaala is ABSOLUTELY laazim in order to take back your ex …

ands seond thing just for info , in islam a woman cant ask for divorce its called a khulla and rules of Khulla ..ISlamically .. i suggest you read up

Dear fbi, the concept of 3 talaqs declared 1 was not present during the time of Prophet pbuh and in time of Hz Abu Bakr ra.

I know that hanafis consider utterances of 3 times talaq as final but this not opinion of other ulema and even Hanafis allow you follow opinion of other madhab in case of necessity and this is called talfiq.

[lipstick]

@sweetdoll

whats so strange about it??? is that so impossible??:(

well it just sounded ridiculous to me. what do u expect us to tell u? how to do black magic on him so he can contact u first? we can't tell u of any way. its upto him if he wants to contact u and frankly speaking i dont think he will

[sweetdoll]

@lipstick

well it just sounded ridiculous to me. what do u expect us to tell u? how to do black magic on him so he can contact u first? we can’t tell u of anyway. its upto him if he wants to contact u and frankly speaking i dont think he will

dun say like that ..:(..am getting lifeless

[lipstick]

Re: I Regret....

^ Oo0oK i am now bowing out of this thread. i hope someone else can get thru to u.

[queer]

Re: I Regret…

i love it how people have an islamic jurisprudence discussion in all seriousness going on when the original poster is just a whimsical critter who doesn’t even want to work for what she thinks she wants now. i take back my taweez offer and join lipstick in the boycott.

[Aimee]

Re: I Regret....

Sweetdoll,

If this is a genuine issue and not a made up story , then this is my honest advise:

Divorce is nothing to be proud of unless you have an absolutely solid reason to justify it. Very few people actually accept their own mistake in leading to a divorce. You are brave enough to have accepted that you shouldnt have opted for divorce in the first place.

now, be brave yet again and do what needs to be done : communicate. Communicate with him. Involve no third or forth person. Just drop him an email , writing in detail how you feel , apologize. Another way of doing it is , request him for a meeting. meet up and speak to him. heart to heart.

you know, the worst thing to do right now is , wait for him to contact you. lets face it he wont. But if you are honest in this reconciliation , then put in your sincere efforts . Leave the rest to Allah. His anger is very valid. Just make sure you speak to him, he will reject you a few times , keep trying to talk to him a few times , dont give up. let him know that you are regretting your actions. I hope inshallah he will come around to accepting you once again.

As far as culture is concerned , you and him have to be happy. Dont bother about the people taunting you etc ... once you guys are back together inshallah things will work out.

[sweetdoll]

@Chicken_Biryani

Sweetdoll,

If this is a genuine issue and not a made up story , then this is my honest advise:

Divorce is nothing to be proud of unless you have an absolutely solid reason to justify it. Very few people actually accept their own mistake in leading to a divorce. You are brave enough to have accepted that you shouldnt have opted for divorce in the first place.

now, be brave yet again and do what needs to be done : communicate. Communicate with him. Involve no third or forth person. Just drop him an email , writing in detail how you feel , apologize. Another way of doing it is , request him for a meeting. meet up and speak to him. heart to heart.

you know, the worst thing to do right now is , wait for him to contact you. lets face it he wont. But if you are honest in this reconciliation , then put in your sincere efforts . Leave the rest to Allah. His anger is very valid. Just make sure you speak to him, he will reject you a few times , keep trying to talk to him a few times , dont give up. let him know that you are regretting your actions. I hope inshallah he will come around to accepting you once again.

As far as culture is concerned , you and him have to be happy. Dont bother about the people taunting you etc … once you guys are back together inshallah things will work out.

thanks alot CB..u know u made me feel so good:)..and u r rite…but the worse thing that can happen, and that i fear is that he will tell his family,and he is a son to my relatives…won’t it make the situation awkward??family wud think am being stupid again…and what if he rejects me and refuses to answer my mail or asks me not to contact again??i wud be so much embarrased in the family and my parents too…many times i thot to contact him,but if h were not from my family,things wud have been a bit easier for me as far as communicating again is concerned:teary1:

[sweetdoll]

@queer

i love it how people have an islamic jurisprudence discussion in all seriousness going on when the original poster is just a whimsical critter who doesn’t even want to work for what she thinks she wants now. i take back my taweez offer and join lipstick in the boycott.

i dun want to work for it???y do u have to say that ??

[KKF]

@Iconoclast

Thats WRONG.

She CAN go back if both of them agree on it. She does not need to marry anyone else and be divorced before re-joining her ex.

However, before making thsi decision she should think what led to divorce and if those thinsg can be changed.

**
u are NOT representing islamic view. u may give this advice to a non muslim for sure. thank you**

[Aimee]

@sweetdoll

thanks alot CB..u know u made me feel so good:)..and u r rite…but the worse thing that can happen, and that i fear is that he will tell his family,and he is a son to my relatives…won’t it make the situation awkward??family wud think am being stupid again…and what if he rejects me and refuses to answer my mail or asks me not to contact again??i wud be so much embarrased in the family and my parents too…many times i thot to contact him,but if h were not from my family,things wud have been a bit easier for me as far as communicating again is concerned:teary1:

Sweetdoll, focus on your key goal: get him back.
It doesnt matter if the family knows , or he goes to tell anyone .. dont fear all these things , they are meaningless. really they are.

Yes people will taunt you initially when they find out and say things that you dont wanna hear .. but you know what, when one has made a mistake , and wants to undo the wrong action, then one must also swallow some of the harsh things people say.

If he tells you not to contact him.. give him a few more days , try to call him or keep writing to him humbly. Just remember , he is very angry for a solid reason… the anger is not going to go away in a day or two days .. its going to take alot of time for the hurt feelings to heal. But if i were you, i wouldnt give up.. continue to let him know of your regret , your true feelings for him, apologize, request him to give you another chance.

returning and apologizing is always embarassing , but just remember , you are brave enough to ignore the embarassment and focus on the ultimate success , him returning to you, inshallah.

So good luck and go for it … in the end if you two do reconcile , parents will only be happier for you .. keep that in mind.

[Iconoclast]

@Khalil KhaaN FaaKhta

u are NOT representing islamic view. u may give this advice to a non muslim for sure. thank you

Khalil Bhaijaan, do some research on the topic and you will find out that thats the correct islamic view.

[Reha]

@sweetdoll

^^ hey i got divorced after nikkah , i didnt have rukhsati…so no question of being pregnant or any related thing…

As far as going back to my husband after divorce is concerned tou i want to make this thing very clear that i have a complete and authentic information about this that i dont have to do HALALA …as in islam HALALA is done after three divorces …three times a women can marry the same person so islamically i can go back to him…i will provide the source to it very soon inshAllah..

but the answer that i want from u people is more related to culture…i mean should i go back to him?if yes,what should i do that i come to know whether he wants the same thing or not(me in his life)??..what should i do to attract him?:(..i miss him …would i lose respect if i go back???should i do this or just forget him now??

Yes, you will lose some respect in his family’s eyes when you go back because you have made yourself look very flakey. No one will completely trust you or your judgement. There will always be something in his heart that will prevent him from fully opening up to you and it wont be intentional…just human nature.

What you feel when you say you miss him might not be HIM, it might just be the idea of a husband in your life. Its nice to have someone in your life as your partner in crime but it has to be the right person and the right time.

@sweetdoll

can’t anyone tell me of some effective wazeefa or dua that he comes back to me?..

Please dont say stuff like this…do dua for whatever is in both of your best interests.

@sweetdoll

no i havent talked to my parents about it…and i cant even coz i took divorce just on my own..no one supported me for it..no one in my family..so if i get back to him,i dunno what wud happen…

i wud appreciate any dua in this context..if u people could tell me

No one supported you because they probably thought you were being immature and not giving him or the marriage a chance. Right now, the posters feel the same way.

@sweetdoll

there was no solid reason…wenever we talked we had a fight,he was very straightforward and aggressive..i thot we are not compatible for each other..i was very afraid and i took divorce…but now i miss him..i regret taking divorce…i wana go back to him..

These kind of things make divorcees look so bad, I dont even know what to say right now. Yes, I understand the communication problems lekin this was the wrong way to handle it.

A part of me wants you to learn from this and move on because the guy probably deserves a peaceful life and none of this headache from you. I feel like he will go through too much being married to you because he will have to literally raise you.

YOu have to realize you hurt him by divorcing him for no hard reasons. He was probably confused at first and now angry because again…he doesnt understand what he did to deserve this. Correcting this wont be as easy as you’re thinking.

@sweetdoll

he is a very mature,aggressive sort of person..if i tell him the whole situation ,do u think he wud accept me ..coz he was not willing to give me divorce..but at the end wen he signed the papers of divorce ,he was very angry and mad at me…i dun think contacting him straight away wud work:teary1:…tell me of sum way that he contacts me himself…

He wont contact you himself because YOU left HIM. As far as he knows, you dont want him in your life. If anyone will contact anyone, you will have to swallow your pride just like he did and contact him. You think it was easy for him to sign papers for a woman who was running away from him for no reason? How much insult do you think he bore?

This isnt a mind game. You cant pick people up and drop them when you feel like it. These kind of things actually hurt emotionally for a long time.

Im disappointed in this whole thing…divorce isnt a joke and marrying people isnt a joke. Forget yourself, you’re playing with someone else’s life here.

[Sara516]

Re: I Regret....

sweetdoll how old are you?