Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
what planet you ON? point me one all inclusive. and ill change my mind. maybe I AM the one on the wrong planet haha
you seem to have missed the sarcasm in my post.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
She's an adult, not a child. Me and my siblings know when to hold our parents accountable when they spout backward views.
Good for you.
Unfortunately you and your siblings are in the minority.
The vast majority of children buckle under such arguments from parents.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
you seem to have missed the sarcasm in my post.
oh..my bad.
i get it now!
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
I was reading a study that for men in the UK,per orgasm, it is cheaper to fly off to Amsterdam twice a month and pay a hooker then it is to get married, opening yourself up to being fleeced in divorce/paying for kids. I'll try and dig it up if I can, I think I it was on return of kings. Fascinating article.
bro...side-chicks are way cheaper than hookers and cleaner too...emotionally a bit more available .
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
bro...side-chicks are way cheaper than hookers and cleaner too...emotionally a bit more available .
Totally agree - but the majority of guys are beta and have no game to get side chicks. So for those guys, the study I mentioned is the cheapest offer on the table so to speak.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
There are things money cant buy
for everything else, there is haq mehr
Haq mehr in millions, jahaiz in millions, inking out 50/50% responsibility (to 3rd decimal value precision) of household work on marriage contract and then we wonder around why society and relationships are disintegrating.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
There are things money cant buy for everything else, there is haq mehr
Haq mehr in millions, jahaiz in millions, inking out 50/50% responsibility (to 3rd decimal value precision) of household work on marriage contract and then we wonder around why society and relationships are disintegrating.
thank you.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
There are things money cant buy for everything else, there is haq mehr
Haq mehr in millions, jahaiz in millions, inking out 50/50% responsibility (to 3rd decimal value precision) of household work on marriage contract and then we wonder around why society and relationships are disintegrating.
This ^
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
For the men that don't like the idea of haqq mehr...don't accept jahaiz...even if she brings it...don't accept it and say NO.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
For the men that don't like the idea of haqq mehr...don't accept jahaiz...even if she brings it...don't accept it and say NO.
It goes all 'round Reha......
- women want a ring worth 3 month's salary
- her parents want unreasonable amounts of mehr
- his parents want jahaiz
- guy wants dual income
it's just ridiculous.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
It really is @Muzna…one thing I realized is that since NOTHING stays the same or can be predicted about life after marriage…why go through all this? Why set high amounts of haq mehr? Why take jahaiz? Why is he or she not enough as they are? Women if you want a ring worth 3 months’ salary, you’ve got the wrong idea about marriage. And men if you want a dual income…maybe you need to take some time to stabilize a bit more first. Life is unpredictable and when you have babies…she will take time off of work…whether she will go back to work or not will depend entirely on how life pans out at that time for you two. What if you have a special needs child? What if you have other hurdles?
As long as you like the person and they seem nice and reasonable, jump in. You’ll be figuring stuff out for the rest of your life.
No amount of preparation can actually prepare you for what lies ahead.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
For the men that don't like the idea of haqq mehr...don't accept jahaiz...even if she brings it...don't accept it and say NO.
I don't think anyone has an issue with haq mehr - the issue lies with the OP's father wanting to show off in front of relatives/friends by having the OP write down an exorbitant haq mehr that the OP will "forgive" after marriage, as well as the OP's inability to stand up to her parents about what she states quite clearly that she doesn't agree with yet stays quiet as a mouse as not to be seen as "batameez" or upset her parents view of the world.
As far as Jahaiz goes, I have two sil's - my family never took a penny from either of them (no cash, no gold, no big hoopla ruksathi, just nikkah with 6 people from my household as guests in each instance). My family actually has double standards when it comes to jahaiz, they don't take a penny off of the parents of in coming girls yet my sister is getting married next month and is going to get a seven figure sterling jahaiz. Oh the irony!
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
Guys, what is the appropriate haq meher to ask? 1000 dollars? 2000? I know some people give like 1 dollar. But isnt the amount given for security for the wife? So that if any thing happens to her husband she can be financially strong for a short time. (assuming she doesnt work) I am not sure about haq mehers and i have read in the Quran about it, but not sure how much is the norm or right amount to give/accept.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
I don't think anyone has an issue with haq mehr - the issue lies with the OP's father wanting to show off in front of relatives/friends by having the OP write down an exorbitant haq mehr that the OP will "forgive" after marriage, as well as the OP's inability to stand up to her parents about what she states quite clearly that she doesn't agree with yet stays quiet as a mouse as not to be seen as "batameez" or upset her parents view of the world.
As far as Jahaiz goes, I have two sil's - my family never took a penny from either of them (no cash, no gold, no big hoopla ruksathi, just nikkah with 6 people from my household as guests in each instance). My family actually has double standards when it comes to jahaiz, they don't take a penny off of the parents of in coming girls yet my sister is getting married next month and is going to get a seven figure sterling jahaiz. Oh the irony!
Nice of ur parents not to ask jahaiz frm ur SILs. I guess theyre giving ur sister all the jahaiz out of love.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
Nice of ur parents not to ask jahaiz frm ur SILs. I guess theyre giving ur sister all the jahaiz out of love.
I still thinks it's wrong and voice my opinion to my parents whenever they bring it up - I get told to mind my business, shuts me right up!
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
Nice of ur parents not to ask jahaiz frm ur SILs. I guess theyre giving ur sister all the jahaiz out of love.
What is jahaiz i never heard of it????
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
What is jahaiz i never heard of it????
dowry.
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
It goes all 'round Reha...... - women want a ring worth 3 month's salary - her parents want unreasonable amounts of mehr - his parents want jahaiz - guy wants dual income
it's just ridiculous.
AMEN!
Re: How to handle the Haq Mehr situation
As far as Jahaiz goes, I have two sil's - my family never took a penny from either of them (no cash, no gold, no big hoopla ruksathi, just nikkah with 6 people from my household as guests in each instance). My family actually has double standards when it comes to jahaiz, they don't take a penny off of the parents of in coming girls yet my sister is getting married next month and is going to get a seven figure sterling jahaiz. Oh the irony!
If you are contributing to it, you cannot complain about it anymore.
Guys, what is the appropriate haq meher to ask? 1000 dollars? 2000? I know some people give like 1 dollar. But isnt the amount given for security for the wife? So that if any thing happens to her husband she can be financially strong for a short time. (assuming she doesn't work) I am not sure about haq mehers and i have read in the Quran about it, but not sure how much is the norm or right amount to give/accept.
It depends on the financial capabilities of the husband.
And to be honest...haq mehr is nothing nowadays. Your joint assets are much more than mehr usually and in the US courts you'll never get it.
Plus, women don't need it. Set a reasonable amount and get it over with. Its a gift and should be treated as such.