Guys, what is the appropriate haq meher to ask? 1000 dollars? 2000? I know some people give like 1 dollar. But isnt the amount given for security for the wife? So that if any thing happens to her husband she can be financially strong for a short time. (assuming she doesnt work) I am not sure about haq mehers and i have read in the Quran about it, but not sure how much is the norm or right amount to give/accept.
Doesn't really work like that anymore. Its more a gift from husband to wife and can be anything. Doesn't have to be money. My haq meher is my dressing table lol.
Wow. Agree with bigdanawab on this one. Didn't bother to read the rest of the thread so sorry if I'm missing some details.
Why isn't Islam a part of their hearts when it comes to these things? They talk about Islam but it's just talk. Big is right. Haq mehr isn't a transaction fee or a reflection of the worth of the girl. It's a show of the affection the guy has for the girl, and it's entirely dependent on how much he makes. He can only promise what's realistic. And she needs to keep the money. Enough with this BS of giving it back etc. That money is protection insurance in case of a divorce or if he dies - that's hers only and no relatives have a right to that money. That's for her and her kids. She should take it and save it for a rainy day and If she is the rare few that never needs it then great. Bequeath it to your children or something.
It's supposed to be theoretically enough to keep her expenses for around 3 months in the event of divorce or death of the husband so it gives her some time to make plans and come up with an alternative income source apart from a man's pocket.
God. I'm so glad girls are getting more educated these days and getting jobs. I don't care if this is leading to spinsterhood if that's even the real cause (it isn't). At least the new generation of working women don't need to put up with this nonsense.
Good lot a dining table will do when the relationship floods over with adultery or death or sickness or loss of job. I guess you can make a raft out of it and row it.
It's supposed to be theoretically enough to keep her expenses for around 3 months in the event of divorce or death of the husband so it gives her some time to make plans and come up with an alternative income source apart from a man's pocket.
God. I'm so glad girls are getting more educated these days and getting jobs. I don't care if this is leading to spinsterhood if that's even the real cause (it isn't). At least the new generation of working women don't need to put up with this nonsense.
Good lot a dining table will do when the relationship floods over with adultery or death or sickness or loss of job. I guess you can make a raft out of it and row it.
Dude alhumdulillah I have a degree and inshallah opportunities to use it and support myself. I deliberately chose an object and not money for my haq meher so that it would be received and given completely as a gift. Plus there is also a hadith which says haq meher can be anything even an iron ring. I could always sell it if I needed to. God forbid that ever happens.
I'm curious....it seems to be commonplace to consider mehr as an insurance policy in the event the marriage falls apart. Where is the reference to this being the reason for its existence in our deen? Is there hadees or mention in quran of such use of the funds (i.e. to support oneself in the event of divorce) received as mehr?
I'd suggest the girl and the guy to sort it out between themselves and stick to it. The more people you will try to get involved, the messier it gets. The relatives are there for the ooohs and aaahs and will disappear after the wedding. Parents are obviously more concerned about some twisted concept of izzat.
So have the guy turn down any dowry. Offer a mehr that the girl and guy have no problem with. Bas!
The guy can put a million dollars on the piece of paper and be financially strong enough to give it. But what if he doesn't treat her right?