How do you say No to a telemarketer?

teggy · February 2, 2009, 8:35pm

Okay, so you’re just minding your own business. You’re sitting around watching television with no care in the world, and the phone rings. No, it’s not your friend. It’s a telemarketer. And they’re trying to sell you stuff.

It always starts off easy-go-lucky, and nice brief intro. By the time you’ve said “I’m doing well”, BOOM! they go right into the sales pitch, and you my friend are on your way to purchasing that big screen television that you thought you couldn’t afford. Lucky? No, you just happen to be on the list of 1000 calls the guy in cubicle needs to make before he can go home.

So, how do you deal with telemarketer? Do you have a punchline that you use to ensure the conversation is short n to the point? Do you start selling them stuff instead? Do you just hang up? What do you doooooo…

Heard this on the radio last night:

Telemarketer calls: John answers “Hello!”

Tele: How are you doing sir?

John: I’m doing good.

Tele: And what is your name, sir?

John: It’s very nice.

Tele: Chuckling Err Your last name sir.

John: It’s ‘Nice’.

Tele: Chuckling Okay, and your first name, sir?

John: It’s ‘Very’. I told you, it’s Very Nice.

Tele: And is that your real name?

John: Well…it used to be Easy Nice. When i was born, my mother said “Oh that was Easy”, and they just named me easy. Then i changed it to very.

Tele: And what do you do sir?

John: I have a fastfood business.

Tele: What’s the name of your business?

John: Nice ‘N’ Easy.

Tele: Er…name of your business?

John: Yes, that’s it. Nice ‘N’ Easy.

Tele: What do you do there?

John: We make fastfood.

Tele: And the address for your establishment, sir?

John: Click Dial-Tone. Well that was easy… Call Ends

Mirch · February 2, 2009, 8:39pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

I tell them flat I am not interested. By now after I have my phone number in do not call registry the only calls I get , that too, very rarely are about some donation.

zobia · February 2, 2009, 8:39pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

me no english.

Niksik · February 2, 2009, 8:41pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

I tell them that mommy and daddy aren’t at home.

Mirch · February 2, 2009, 8:41pm

LOL , never tried that , people have told me that works too. :k:

teggy · February 2, 2009, 8:46pm

And does that work?

Milly · February 2, 2009, 8:48pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

You have to adopt the BT woman voice and say 'Im sorry, the number you have dialled has not been recognised, please replace the handset and try again.'

fat_spartan · February 2, 2009, 8:55pm

It depends on what they're trying to sell me. For the most part, recently it's been long distance phone plans. In this case I'll tell them that I'm happy with the one I have and I've been disappointed with others, so I don't want to change my long distance plan now.

Sometimes my cell phone provider calls me to try different features. If I think they'll be useful, I'll try them out. If I don't think it's worth it, I'll tell them that.

curiosity · February 2, 2009, 9:00pm

moun se aur kaisey

a big fat NO:)

Reha · February 2, 2009, 10:02pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

I try to tell them no politely and if they dont listen, I hang up.

teggy · February 3, 2009, 5:19am

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

Yeah, but i hate to just hang up on people. And they just don’t give up easily. They’ll like insist that you atleast keep hearing what they have to say. Makes it kinda hard to say ‘NO DUDE!’

TLK · February 3, 2009, 6:06am

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

Tell them that you are the guest and actual owner of the house are not at home ..

that is not even a lie .. especially if you are renting .. in case you are financing, then bank is the owner

Reha · February 3, 2009, 6:40am

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

See Teggy, it seems like you're a nice guy. So you feel rude haning up on them. :)

A few things you could say are:

My parents are not home right now.

Habla Espanol?

Im the babysitter.

Im actually just house sitting, real owners will be back next week.

Humein Angrezi nahin aati, jao kisi aur ka dimagh khao.

Let_Uz_Chat · February 3, 2009, 7:15am

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

Hello may I speak to Mr. ---- ----- please? Speaking! This is Jack calling from ---------. Abhey joginder Nath kya haal hai yaar, kafi arsay kay baad ghanti mari? The other person has cleared.

ChiLLyMiLLy · February 3, 2009, 5:13pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

Well, unfortunately I have been one of those annoying people.

And we were expected to nag about the product. Jiske liye humko bohut achay se jawaab milte thay agay se. But luckily I quit after 6 weeks.

So a couple of months ago, this telemarketer calls. He was selling his story so well, that my dad ended up giving him his account number baaton baaton mein. Then my dad realized ke yeh acha nahin hua. So he said, I’m sorry… I’m not interested, there must’ve been some miscommunication. But that dude just kept on nagging. So my dad hung up after telling him politely a couple of times that he’s not interested.

TWO minutes later, that same person calls again. This time I picked up the phone. Can I speak to sir…? Well, I told him he can talk to me, because we won’t have much to say to eachother. He tried explaining me why he called again, and I told him that my dad wasn’t interested. ‘But…’ ‘I’m sorry, we’re really not interested.’ I hung up.. and then he called again!!!

So then I got quite agitated and simply asked him one question:

‘WHICH PART OF NO DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND??’

This time he hung up on me.

Cantankerous · February 3, 2009, 5:22pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

This friend of mine told a telemarketer that his parents had passed away in an accident the previous week. The poor caller ended up apologizing.

I think that was taking it a little too far.

Spock · February 3, 2009, 5:30pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

A while back I used to get calls from some desi telemarketers asking me to sign up for Dish, which I already had but it was kinda hard to get that through their thick skulls, and they'd ask if I could give them numbers of friends and relatives.

ChiLLyMiLLy · February 3, 2009, 5:31pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

^Cantankerous.. Yea, minus the little.

rozendeva · February 3, 2009, 6:10pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

The minute you give away your name ... they wont ever stop calling you !

Occassionally i hang up even before they start .. but once in a while , I like to wind them up by acting like an insurance agent and start selling them insurance ! and they hang up !

my sister is even more funny ... she actually acts she is deaf ! they hang up pretty quickly on her !

kurripunjaban · February 3, 2009, 7:38pm

Re: How do you say No to a telemarketer?

have you guys ever had the desi telemarketers? one day someone rings, 'asalamalaykum' im like ummm must be some uncle ringing for my dad right? so im like 'waalaikumussalam' then he goes 'ji ap kon?' im just thinking its some uncle who doesnt know me, so i told him my name and he was like 'achaa..well **** ji, mein **** say call kar raha hoon, humarhi eik nahin offer......' i was just like whaaat?! sometimes they'll even say 'ji mein **** saab say baat karsakta hoon**?' so i'll give it to my dad thinking its his friend but noooo...bad times.