Bluff judge is back. He asks Salim malik, "you recieved this 14K Rayal cheque, the day before you lost the match."
Salim: "Yes, but this money is related to my personal business in sharjah"
Bluff judge: "Right after the match, they sent you another cheque for the same amount."
Salim: "What!" then thinks a little and asks the judge "Can I make a quick call".
"go ahead" - judge says
5 minutes later salim malik returns to the witness stand and says "No, I did not recieve any cheque the next day"
"how can you say that?" bluff judge
"because I just checked with bookies. they have'nt send it yet" - salim malik replies with confidence.
Duncan Fletcher:
"This does not make sense, we, the second best test team in the world, lose so many tests against minor teams. Losing to #1 test team I understand, but why should we lose to #3, #4 and #5 teams. They are not even as good as us. Its time these teams should realize that something is not right with this picture and should give us the respect that we, as the #2 test team, deserve. Pretty soon I will have Vaughn, Flintoff, Pierson all signing on this petition. About Ashes, I think australians, if they are so desperate about it, can keep it for now. But they must admit it was a close call. I mean we could've won all 5 matches comprehensively and we found australians way too wary of that humiliation. You could tell from their body language how nervous they were, in battling their way to these wins. I think we proved our point and I consider it to be a successfull trip despite of the end results, which are not telling the complete story. The fact that aussies were so completely overwhelmed is not shown in the statistics. Also i want to warn international media, not to indulge in #2 test team debate. Its because of them we have to prove our worth by winning a series every 10-12 years. My next personal ambition is to beat australia in their own game i.e. test cricket. ODI we dont care much about, because its for losers. We are a team of big names and big games. To aussies who we believe are working hard as we speak now, in preperations of defending ashes next year, we say, bring it on baby."
Soon after this speach, the english coach fell on the ground, because of being heavily drunk.
Shoaib Akhter visited a doctor, because Inzi insisted that he is not fit enough for the team.
"Can I have this removed?" - Shoaib asks doctor
"What?" - Doc asks
Shoaib gives him Inzi's picture.
Shoaib Akhter gets hold of woolmer's cell phone and changes the speed dial, in the following order
The laptop mechanic changes to Javed Miandad's number
Azhar Mahmood changes to Azharuddin
Shoaib Malik changes to Shoaib Akhter
that day woolmer makes call to #3, and gets Akhter on the line. "So hows the training going" - woolmer asks. "I told you one day you will call me" - Akhter says. "Damn it" Woolmer checks the number and hangs up. Then he calls #2, and gets Azharuddin instead of Azhar Mahmood. "I am sorry, It seems your career is over now" - woolmer says. "who the heck are you. tell me something i dont know" - Azharudin says and then hangs up. Woolmer was confused wats wrong with his cell phone, so he calls his laptop guy to check his cell phone, and Miandad picks up. "I guess something is not right with my mobile phone, I know you are the laptop guy, but can you check my cell phone". - woolmer asks. "Mocking kel la hey, mocking kel la hey mujhey, laptop guy bol laha hey" - miandad shouted. "shukel kel mujh ko angrezi nahi aati. welna sunata aisi ke tu apney paiso se ticket khaleed ke bhag jata yehan se. cell phone ka kia hey jo tujh se nahi chala, khalab kel diya. jo pooli team khalab kee tu ne wo. uska nahi bolay ga. mobile phone use kelna ata nahi, laptop use kalen gey".
deal no deal. I want you to consider the offer? Bookie asks Salim Malik. "I have no problem, I don't know which one to consider". "Oh you have another one in the pipeline" Bookie asks. "Well, you know how it works with pros" malik replied. "Alright we can change the briefcase, christie, get the one from the back". Salim Malik looked very excited, when bookie says "christie, open the case". "Wow, thats a lot of money, I accept it". Salim malik says. "Don't you wanna know what was in the other briefcase" Bookie asks. "Yeah I do" malike replied. Bookie opens the other briefcase and there was a tape recorder running in there. "You are under arrest Mr. Malik. now we have the whole saga on tape. I am not a bookie, I am an undercover cop".
Waqar to wasim: Why did you put Aamer Sohail in the slip? He has dropped 3 catches so far off my bowling.
Wasim: "AH, to make keeper Moin Khan look better".
Fielding compitition: 11 players from the top 8 teams (aus, nzl, ind, sl, pak, sa, eng, wi) were all collected in a stadium and throwball machines threw 88 balls up in the air for the players to catch. 15 seconds later, each south african player had atleast 3 and each aussie fielder had 2 and each english & nzl player had 1 ball in their hands. Srilankan fielders were able to get hold of 5 balls while indian and westindian teams each got 3. Pakistani players were not able to catch any of them. Inzi was once again interviewed after this. "Howcome your team could'nt take a single catch out of 88 falling balls?". In relpy Inzi said "Most of our players already see more than 1 balls and half of the time they catch the wrong one. With so many balls coming towards us, we actually saw atleast 178 balls (Kamran Akmal and Farhat see atleast 3 all the time). So as you could see, our task was twice as hard. Also, in the actual match, we help eachother by pointing our fingers to the direction of the ball and even calling the fielder's name sometimes. We clearly got no such help from players of other teams. In the absense of this team spirit factor, we attempted to catch the one, we thought was right ball. I cannot speak for others but I think I had my hands set on the right ball. If not for Kamran Akmal, who though my hand was the ball, I would have caught it". At the sametime, Kamran Akmal told media that he was about to catch the right ball, but using the wrong hand i.e. Inzi's hand.
