thats so lame anyways uneducated, shallow n insensitive ppl r everywhere..
Shallow and inconsiderate behavior can also transcend education and location. I'm not saying that all girls in Pak are like that. I've seen some who are very open-minded and have a healthy mind-set. But in my experience....i've noticed more of a emphasis on physical appearance among girls in Pak...to the point that it prevents one from being tactful.
"Pinching your nose will make it thinner"......................................UNBELIEVABLE!!!
Why doesn't anybody ever share any useful information with me? If I had known that, I would have been pinching away since infancy.
;)
Ah rude people. They suck. They're everywhere. Their rudeness takes different forms - but East or West, you can't go anywhere without bumping into at least one. In Pakistan, yeah...there's a big concern regarding physical appearance and it can manifest in the form of obnoxious comments directed your way. Unless you make sure your makeup is done and every hair is in place, you'd better be prepared for the dumb comments to fly. When I was in the mother country a few years back, a good friend's great aunt had passed away shortly after my friend got married. People were coming to her house to pay their respects and people actually came up to my friend who was dressed very simply as befitting the occasion, and asked why she didn't look like a dulhan? I think my jaw still hurts from hitting the floor all those years ago. Really? You want the girl to dress up with full makeup and jewelry at a funeral?
But it's here too. Just sit back and listen to the conversation at a wedding in the states. "Yaar, this biryani doesn't taste good." "What is the bride wearing? She's already so dark, bechari, it only makes her look darker." "Why isn't the dulhan covering her hair? This is besharmi." After 10 minutes of that, I seriously feel like screaming, "Oh my god SHUT UP. You're not hear because we need a peanut gallery. You're here because you're supposed to be the friends/family of the couple who wish them well, not as food/fashion/complexion critics."
Pakistan, Amreeka...doesn't matter. The rude people are all around us.
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
Also, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. People are entitled to their individual preferences regarding looks in a partner. I doubt that people get brides from Pak.....only because they think that girls in Pak are prettier. Rather....I think that some parents believe that a girl from Pakistan will make a better wife/bahu. Maybe it's because they perceive girls in Pak to be more submissive or obedient or moral and adept at domestic chores. To each his own.
Physical appearance has its own unique importance in a relationship. After all....regardless of what the world thinks of your partner.........YOU should find your partner attractive. To deny that physical attraction is not important....is silly. However........a pretty face is never an indication of a person's personality or character.
I understand that there are exceptions to generalizations. ** But I've noticed that girls living in Pak.......are MORE concerned about physical appearance.......and there have been several threads where girls have complained that whenever they visit the **motherland.........their cousins in Pakistan bombard them with condescending/insulting comments about physical appearance....."what's wrong with your skin color?"....... "Why are you so dark?"......... "Omg what's wrong with your weight?"......... "OMG you are tooo skinny."....... "OMG you are toooo fat".......... "So n So is better looking than you."....... "Why is your hair fried?"....... "Why don't you wear makeup? Makeup is so important."......... "Your hair has gotten thinner."......... "Pinching your nose will make it thinner"......................................UNBELIEVABLE!!! And the funny thing is that they themselves might have imperfections such as being overweight.........but they won't hesitate to tell you what's wrong with you. At the same time.....they can't handle it or take it if you defend yourself or if you hurl the criticism their way.
I haven't see such behavior among desi girls in the US. When I go to Pak........I don't make such comments. If I don't have anything positive or complimentary to say........I don't say it at all. One time, I asked my mom about why the girls in Pak are more concerned about physical appearance to the point it takes top priority over BASIC MANNERS. And my mom said that....since there are not many career opportunities or other personal development programs for women in the less modern cities of Pakistan.....hence their main goal after education is to look FAIR-SKINNED and pretty.....so that they attract a husband and settle down to married-life.
see that's when education comes in. We being abroad are not so complexed to having a sanwala color, maybe cause were around ppl of dif color and race, and have more career choices compared to them. Out there, speaking of experience, in small city like multan last year when I visited, girls did not have many career opportunities. Even if they study ahead there weren't many work opportunities for women in that city and moving away alone is a taboo. So their main goal is morely to get a got rishta, and have a husband bragging her beauty. Some of my relatives In lahore are the total opposite, living in a big city, they are mostly in medicine related careers, enjoying, and really are nowhere those GORA PHOBIA LADIES. but how may modern cities are there in pak other then lahore islamabad and karachi? so the majority of women are of what I am generalizing.
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
giving sweepin statements abt gals livin abroad or in pakistan or generalizing it wud be exageration.
plz avoid this ......... ive seen fashion and beauti obsessed freaks on both sides.
its ok for a gal 2 take care of herself , its her personal choice if she wants to enhance her looks by any means. if she has the luxury of doing it its her choice.
whats wrong is criticising others for their physical appearence.
[quote="lil_ash, post:13, topic:202032"]
see that's when education comes in. We being abroad are not so complexed to having a sanwala color, maybe cause were around ppl of dif color and race, and have more career choices compared to them.
I have seen desi girls born and raised in the US who had a complex about their darker skin color growing up. And in my opinion....this complex/insecurity.....was developed by their moms/aunties.......who grew up in Pakistan......and passed on negative comments about darker skin to their daughters....even after settling abroad. I'm not saying all moms/aunties are like that.......but I've heard stories of girls saying they developed the insecurity from comments heard by elders in the family or in movies/media etc.
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
^ Even though they look very beautiful with their swarthy color.
these giving sweepin statements abt gals livin abroad or in pakistan or generalizing it wud be exageration. plz avoid this ......... ive seen fashion and beauti obsessed freaks on both sides.
its ok for a gal 2 take care of herself , its her personal choice if she wants to enhance her looks by any means. if she has the luxury of doing it its her choice. whats wrong it criticising others for their physical appearence.
I've already said in my first post in this thread that there ARE exceptions to the generalization. I've even said that not ALL girls in Pak are shallow. I've even said that shallowness transcends education AND LOCATION. I was simply sharing the tendencies I've observed in my own experience.
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
girls back home have no personality. theyr just robots
girls back home have no personality. theyr just robots
WOW
and u have it all my friend.. The voice
and since u have catagorized em as robots they must be programmed to do "some useful stuff" compared to u , whom i believe is only programmed to pass uncalled for judgements n derogatory remarks
now where did u cum up wid that $#!^ anyway??
hahahaha . don’t watching saas bahu dramas count as a personality factor? 
. redvelvet, that pecentage of girls out here having color issues is very few. I see girls admiring beyonce more then angelina jolie.
wht kindda gals in pakistan watch saas bahu serials anyways ?? none of the ppl i know do .
its al abt nauseating conspiracies n politics , while switchin channels just a glimps of those makes one kindda eeeeweuh.
**infact **a couple of gals i know in canada do … but im not implying that all gals living abroad have reduced their IQs to a number 0 by watching those dramas .( i wud neva say that it wud be such an overstatement n wrong)
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
dude, I spent a good 5months in paki last year and trust me atleat 75% watch them. We had more indian channels compared to paki or english. Maybe lack of channels could be a factor but o trust me theyyy love those never ending soap operas.
dude, I spent a good 5months in paki last year and trust me atleat 75% watch them. We had more indian channels compared to paki or english. Maybe lack of channels could be a factor but o trust me theyyy love those never ending soap operas.
may be they do sum of them , i was talkin abt gals .. ..aunties do i know .
cant exactly disclose my exact line ov work , but im in media management n i know for sure that young educated gals dont .
sick indian soaps target audiences r rural, or uneducated, middle aged masses.
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
well the mostly watch for clothing jewelry or makeup reason. I'm speaking of the city multan. people out there aren't as ........
well the mostly watch for clothing jewelry or makeup reason. I'm speaking of the city multan. people out there aren't as ........
ya i get it ,despite being immensely populated .. literacy rate is the lowest almost that of rural areas .
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
isn't more then half of pak made up of rural areas?
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
hmmm, you’ve got to see the recent batch of newly wed girls coming in from back home. They are not just smarter (chalaak) but also so consumed by the way they look and dress. It’s strange to see 20-21 yr old girls having solid game plans to tackle inlaws and be so pakki pakki…no innocence. Girls from good families here still are conscious about religious values, you see them making an extra effort to stay in midst of culture and religion, they are more flexible (jeez, I just met 2 young brides from pak…one has allergies to dishwashing liquid and the other is asking her ma to send a maid :halo:)…so yeah…pretty maybe, but shallow.
PS: this is a generalization, forgive me but I don’t mean to say all girls are like that. You’ll find enough such models here as well
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
lil ash
ya right rural area 80%, population 60-65%.
but most of those dont have access to cable or dishes
they ony rely on terrestrial broadcast ie ptv s(state owned channels)
so they don watch these whacko soaps coz they dont hav access
Re: Go back home and get a prettier girl?
cocoo I second that. our gaon(village) had cable, and cellfones are two things atleast 60% of pakistani population don't lack on. precisely our nation made useless products a luxury.