Gift ideas for the in-laws

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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Hi all,

Firstly, I would like to thank all those that helped me prepare for my trip to Karachi recently. I am home in one piece :slight_smile:

I am now in the process of considering wedding gifts for my fiance and in laws. I would appreciate some suggestions on what to gift my mother-in-law, father-in-law, brother-in-law, and sister-in-law, etc. What is the norm?

I am also looking to gift my fiance a luxury watch, any suggestions on how much to spend? (GBP)

Thanks in advance :slight_smile:

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

suits, cologne/perfume, gold jewelry (choice of earrings, chain, karay), watches.

how much you want to spend depends on your budget.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Since when did this become a custom? I've seen it loads on GS, but in real life, never. I never gave any gifts to in-laws when I got married, and never got any gifts from them, other than the barri. People give gold?!! whaaaaaat?????

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

^barri is not considered a gift ? :hmmm: laitay hain tay daitay bhi hain !! If Islam is applied on not giving gold gift to IL’s, it should be equally applicable on the bahu for not accepting gold gifts in name of barri as well.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

this is very common and i am shocked you have never seen it. I think it more common in punjab then sindh.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

but wouldn’t the barri be the same things as the gift given for the guy? normally the guys gets stuff too…not as expenise as the girls gold but they still get it.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Well I didn't even understand the concept of barri until in-laws gave me a suitcase the night before the wedding and I was thinking wth is this?! So I had no expectations and happily prepared for my wedding on my own without expecting gifts! Barri was a bonus :)

I guess you have a point on not accepting gifts if you're not giving them... but I thought as it's the bride's day that's the reason for getting all the gifts. ILs have all/will probably get married themselves so will have gotten gifts! I mean, you don't gift back to all the people you invited to the wedding who gave you a gift, do you?

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Noooooooo we never gave hubby anything lol. Were they expecting?? lolzzzz ooops!! We just made his suit for the wedding day, nothing else.

Seriously - I don't know anyone in my immediate relatives or friends who have done this gift-giving at weddings. It's always discussed on here. Mind you, people discuss how they spend lakhs and lakhs on wedding dresses here, which I never did either. So I'm assuming a different crowd frequents GS!

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Pakoray dipped in cyanide.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Sorry to tell you but again its very common, and why wouldn't you want to gift the inlaws and the groom. For the guy, the gifts are normally handed to him during the baraat from each family member (brothers, sisters, father and mother of the bride.) So like a watch, cash, and other stuff.

This is very old things...nothing new...it might have fadded in your family, but not going anywhere in mine.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

My hubby loves watches, so i let him pick his own. It was a Tag. It was around $2200. But this was almost 4 years ago.

For my MIL and each SIL we gave an outfit each, and a gold rings to the sisters and a set to the MIL . For the FIL we got him a Movoado watch ($800,) and gave him fabric for a suit.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

I find the IL gift giving a bit frivolous but that's me. MIL, FIL, SIL, BIL don't need gifts, its not their wedding and they're old enough to buy themselves anything they want.

Don't stress, give what you want in your budget and from the heart.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

In my family the tradition is to give the groom's mother, father, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunties and all the first cousins suits. The quality and work of the dresses normally decrease with the distance of the relationship.. But now most people have omitted the cousins, and some give just the eldest child in every family.. But we will just be giving the immediate family insha Allah, and not even the aunties and uncles.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Definitely cant be giving them GOLD!!:smack2:

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

The best gift will be accept them as if they were your own siblings and parents.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Gora Kala always comes up with philosophical quips.

And I like them. :)

Gora Kala, where have you been, man ? I miss you.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Nnabid, it's possible that gift-giving (including gold) is more common among Punjabis than other ethnic groups and maybe there are variations in tradition.....but it's not uncommon.

There are two things that bother me. Firstly, if the giving if gold to in-laws is made a standard practice, it places tremendous pressure on those who can't afford it.

Secondly, the Prophet SAWS urged us to give gifts because it fosters affection. But ofsos k hamaray culture main ulta hi asar hota hai. The parents of the girl bend over backwards to give gifts to the guy's family in hopes that they will treat their daughter with kindness only to have them treat her like dirt after marriage. Then you have some girls who, after becoming wives, still cannot move on from the meager or unimpressive suits they received as bari from their in-laws... never mind that 1 kid later they can't even fit in them clothes no more. :/

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

Honestly I have never seen gift giving to in laws either.. kashmiri myself but grew up in Punjab and I m married to a punjabi.. No one ever mentioned that in laws should be getting gifts. We paid for husbands valima suit and they paid for my valima lehnga ( we bought it on our own) he got a watch from my mother and I got gold jewelry from my sisters in law.. That's it.

So yep not so common in punjabis as it seems.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

It is a custom. However, how people implement it is different in each family. Most people give outfits to the immediate family and their spouses / fiancées only. But in some like my in laws there is the custom of giving outfits to the extended family, their spouses and money for bangles and mehndi to the girl cousins too. We are Urdu speaking. In Biharis only the nands ( grom's sisters) get outfits. People who can afford more give gold to the MIL too.

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Re: Gift ideas for the in-laws

My family’s from Islamabad and Pindi. I’ve been to Pk for different family members’ weddings over the years and NEVER witnessed this. Also, got married to someone from Punjab and we never did the gift giving either. In my view it’s excessive - an additional extra to the already mounting costs a wedding incurs.

Exactly the same in my case. We made hubby’s sherwani for the baraat day; they made my walima outfit for the next day. That was it. I never got any wedding gift from SIL :naraz: hubby told me after marriage though that their wedding gift to him was to pay for his walima suit, which I thought was a nice idea :slight_smile: