Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
Girl does not have to take guy’s last name. In fact Islam prefer people be called by their father’s name and thats how it will happen on the day of judgement too.
"Call them by (the names of) their fathers: that is juster in the sight of Allah. But if ye know not their father’s (names, call them) your Brothers in faith, or your maulas. But there is no blame on you if ye make a mistake therein: (what counts is) the intention of your hearts: and Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful. "
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
^^^ Sheesh, you won't shut up about the last name thing!
I dunno where you guys are from, but you are def not from the United States.
In the U.S/Canada/West majority of Muslim couples have the same last name, just like everyone else here!!! Its not rare at all. Its just for legal purposes.
Don't bring Islam into everything and try to make it sound as if its haram. Its not.
Even in Pakistan most women have their husbands first name as their last, I don't agree with that website, its just one website and opinion. To me that Quranic verse is talking about orphans.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
First, stop making wrong assumptions about the people and their locations.
secondly, majority of people doing wrong thing does not make it right.
Why is it wrong? Says who, that Quranic verse is speaking about orphan males buddy, read the verse before and after, don't quote out of context
nor has He made those whom you assert to be your** sons your real sons*; these are the words of your mouths; and Allah speaks the truth and He guides to the way.
**Call them by (the names of) their fathers: that is juster in the sight of Allah. But if ye know not their father's (names, call them) your Brothers in faith, or your maulas*. But there is no blame on you if ye make a mistake therein: (what counts is) the intention of your hearts: and Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful.
This verse is clearly talking about male adopted sons, nothing to do with a wife changing her last name to that of her husband for legal purposes.
Why are you arguing over an off topic subject, which has nothing to do with the topic?
There are some muslims who claim taking pictures is haram, using camera is haram, all music is haram, using mouthwash is haram, doesn't mean i am going to start following them too.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
However I would say most Muslim couples in the United States or Canada have the same last name, it just makes things easier for tax purposes, travel purposes, insurance forms, hospital visits, mail collection, bank accounts, etc...if you are traveling with one parent and the kids have a diff last name U.S border protection and immigration officers in other countries will make a big deal out of it. They will think you are not the parent and will hold you until they verify things.
Not true.... we live in the US, my daughter was born here.
I have my husband's first name as my last name and my daughter has the same last name while my husband has a different last name.... we have never had issues with taxes, insurance, bank accounts, traveling, etc..... I've traveled to Canada and Pakistan several times.... with husband as well as with daughter only.
Quote facts, mate .... hawai baatein mat karo.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
I would like to stay close to both parents and see them both fairly often and even go with one set of parents (i.e. either my inlaws or my parents) to the others' place.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
My husband is mashaAllah very friendly with my side of the family… he even cracks lame jokes with my mom which usually horrify me and I’m like OMG! what are you saying… and he just laughs it off, apparently my mom doesn’t mind… she also laughs, so all is well
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
wow thn u r lucky u hav a husb lik ths , ur inlaws mst b liviin in states n ur family i gues rgt now in pak , so all ths conversation mst b done over phone crackin lame jokes n the stuff :p
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
Not true.... we live in the US, my daughter was born here.
I have my husband's first name as my last name and my daughter has the same last name while my husband has a different last name.... we have never had issues with taxes, insurance, bank accounts, traveling, etc..... I've traveled to Canada and Pakistan several times.... with husband as well as with daughter only.
Quote facts, mate .... hawai baatein mat karo.
LOL, all I said was it makes things easier, sometimes you have to prove relationship status to state, local, and federal authorities, or even some public or private corporations.
Obviously there are many ways to do that ie birth certificates, marriage certificate etc.., however having the same last name is just a simple convenient way, as its easily recognized here, since its part of the culture. Authorities will usually accept that on the spot.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
^Actually, you said most muslim couples in USA have the same last name..... which I have not seen.
All the Pakistani females I know have their husband's first name as last name or have kept their maiden names. I even have some Lebanese and Iranian females working with me.... they all have kept their maiden names.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
^Actually, you said most muslim couples in USA have the same last name..... which I have not seen.
All the Pakistani females I know have their husband's first name as last name or have kept their maiden names. I even have some Lebanese and Iranian females working with me.... they all have kept their maiden names.
Well we are both going to have to go by anecdotal evidence, as all the Muslim couples I have seen, Paki or non Paki, who married in the U.S, have the same last name :)
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
What does a name have to do with financial dependence? You have your husbands first name, do you have it cause you are more dependent on him?
Are you trying to imply just cause a lady is educated she shouldn’t take her husbands name?
HMM so you think Hillary CLINTON is not financially independent from Bill CLINTON, how about Michelle OBAMA (took on a tribal African name for her husband)
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
^Actually, you said most muslim couples in USA have the same last name..... which I have not seen.
All the Pakistani females I know have their husband's first name as last name or have kept their maiden names. I even have some Lebanese and Iranian females working with me.... they all have kept their maiden names.
Just asked my students. Three of them said that their moms kept their maiden names. One of them said that his mom would have gone to back to her maiden name if she knew that it wasn't required for her to change it. I just remembered that one of students from last year....his mom is Desi and she kept her maiden name. I have a Pakistani friend who kept her maiden name.......and have encountered several other Muslim women who also did not take on their husband's last name. If I get married....I plan to keep my maiden name. The children can take on the father's last name to represent the lineage....the wife is not required to do so.
People vary in terms of their experiences (the people they encounter), but just because "all" the women that an individual has encountered changed their last names.....that doesn't mean that every single Muslim woman outside of that person's social circle also did the same thing, LOL.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
What does a name have to do with financial dependence? You have your husbands first name, do you have it cause you are more dependent on him?
Are you trying to imply just cause a lady is educated she shouldn't take her husbands name?
HMM so you think Hillary CLINTON is not financially independent from Bill CLINTON, how about Michelle OBAMA (took on a tribal African name for her husband)
Actually Hilary RODHAM Clinton used her maiden name of Rodham during the early years of her legal/political career. The transition the hypehnated name was strategic to support her husband's polical career and then her move to Clinton alone was yet another strategic move to cash in on the goodwill engendered by her husband during his politicial career.
Re: (for men)are you or would you be close to your in-laws?
Actually Hilary RODHAM Clinton used her maiden name of Rodham during the early years of her legal/political career. The transition the hypehnated name was strategic to support her husband's polical career and then her move to Clinton alone was yet another strategic move to cash in on the goodwill engendered by her husband during his politicial career.
^^ Yeah I just mentioned that, point is she gave up and added Clinton to her name, and is now known has Hillary Clinton or Mrs Clinton. Even though she was a nutjob feminist.
Same thing with Michelle Obama, lol you can't win.
which usually horrify me and I’m like OMG! what are you saying… and he just laughs it off, apparently my mom doesn’t mind… she also laughs, so all is well 
