Feeling Tense and disturb today!

[Kinzz]

Well before engagement he gave me a gold ring also jus to show his love..But yahan sab yehi samjhatay hain k ye sab bekaar hai datzwhy may be ye us ka postive attitude nahi houga.He also give me monthly credit also like 1000 RS per month but may be ye bhi sab bekaar hu as everyone said k ye cheezain ansu khatam nahi karwati hain...

dekho meri bat suno pakistani larke apni girl firend ke liye kuch bhi kar sakte hain aasman se tarey bhi tour ke la sakte hain...lekin apni fiancee aur wife ko pair ki jooti samjhte hain....aur yeh bat tum nahi janti pakistani culture mai rehte howe bhi/??? sab aesy nahi hote kuch ache bhi hote hain...magar tumhare case mai yehi lag raha hai ke pehley wo girl friend samjh ke sab kuch karta hai magar ab nahi....

aur ab apni SIL ki misal lo...wo itni sari cheezen hone ke bawajood Khush keu nahi??tum keh rahi hoo unke ghar mai itne nokar hain itna bara ghar hai her cheez hai unke pas magar uska husband acha nahi...yar tumhare samne tumhari SIL ki misal hai..ke dekho duniya ki dolat jewellry..gifts yeh sab kam nahi atye....agar husband acha na ho to...in cheezo ki koi value nahi reh jati...yeh cheezen to ani jani hain...expensive gidr ya kapre yeh to her fashion ke sath change hote hain...aur yeh to banda her roz badal badal ke leta hai..magar husband to aik hi milta hai usko to banda roz change nahi kar sakta???

[redvelvet]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

^ Perfectly said, Kinzz.

[system]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

[QUOTE]

D.A ....

Listen wuzu karo, namaz paro, Allah se roh kar dua karo tume sahi rasta dekaye aur tumhari madat karein.

The wuzu and salat will give you some peace and clarity of mind. So u can be think more clearly.
[/QUOTE]

couldn't agree more... I always find him there to help in my worst times alhamdulilah

[Aish]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

What's her dad gonna say to him that's gonna make him treat her better? He's gonna listen to her dad than as soon as they get married, he'll do whatever he wants and act as if she's a burden on him. I mean yeah I guess she could get her dad involved but that might piss him off even more

[Aish]

You don't have brother?

You mean in your moms house you and your sister has your own hissa?

Ask him to do repairing things in his home. or make that at least that goood enough to you be able to live there comfortably.

Did you you planned not to leave your own home?

Beta jub bunda phara hai to mazay bhi chakho. Ya free fund main us aurrat kay betay kay snatch kar lena hai us say. Shukar karain wo aurat us kay betay ko chuk lenay kay jurm main aap ko apnanany say inkar naheen kar rahi. Jub us nain itna bara dil dikhaya hai to kuch aap bhi to apni side say sacrifce karo. Ya shadi kay baad banwa lena apni pasand kay mutabiq.

Shukar karo wo itna ahmaq hai kay bardasht kar raha hai apni maan kay khilaaf batain koi doosra hota to bye bye keh deta. You know what after marriage If you will say anything about his mom he is not gonna listen to you at all as he knew before marriage that you are jealous of his mom.

No matter you said things or his mom made him to think that you are jealous of his mom but he has got this in his mind and it won't go away ever.

Why you taking those things that serious. She can't control you living in Pakistan. You do your study. Don't contact her that much. Concentrate on your study. Sure learn to cook without shaan masala. I don't see anything wrong in asking this. She might not liked using shan masala and her daughter might not be listening her. May be she wants you to become good cook.

I say Shaan masala main pakanay walion ka koi credit naheen hota. Just follow the instructions wallah you got great khana. Even boys can cook great khana in shaan masala. Baat to jub hai khud kay masalay say mazaydaar khana banaya jaay.

Yay koi itnay serious issues naheen jis pay uski maan kay khilaaf uskay kaan khaay jain.

Achchi baat dushman bhi kahay to maan leni chahyay. It's my rule. Yay na daikho kon kah raha hai. Yay daikho kia kah raha hai. Achcha kah raha hai to apnao. Ghalat kah raha hai to ignore karo.

I think I made some sense to let you understand. Hope I helped you understanding things.

DON'T EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER SAY ANYTHING AGAINST HIS MOM. Either bardasht or ignore. If you would love or show love towards his mom you will get more love from your husband.

Do you know who the best husti in this whole world after Allah and Muhammad SAWW for a person is HIS/HER MOM.

Instead of getting jahaiz from your parents get cash and from your cash do repair his home and make an attached bath. Use your brain to solve the problems which are very easy. If I would be in your place I would do this. Ask my parents do make an attached bath in his room for me. or give me a home in jahaiz in Pakistan or whereever they live if they can afford otherwise you could earn herself to make changes according to your likings and needs. As you are becoming engineer. I know engineers can earn great money.

I just saw this. Our Prophet (SAW) said to respect our OWN mothers. Nowhere does it say women have to look after their mother in laws, if they do, they're blessed and nice people, but they don't have to.

[Kinzz]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

her dad seems like a good person..thats why he dont want to talk with her fiance...coz we can see how batamiz he is...and im sure her dad knows about his nature thats why her dad said its better to end this engagment and not to talk him...

but if her dad will talk with him he'll act "okay" for few days,but after marrige if something happen and her parents will say something to him then he will say "this is our personal matter"..and i think thats what her father is thinking that talking with him will work only during engagment period...

[redvelvet]

The girl will never show her dad the email he sent.........because if she still has feelings for him......then she knows her dad will be livid and will end the rishta at once (which is the right thing to do).

What I'm saying is that there is no room for evaluation. There is no room for discussion. There is no room for hope or second chances. This guy has proven that the is BEYOND HOPE!

So, the dad simply needs to get on the phone with this guy and CANCEL this rishta. No negotiations, no deals, no compromises, no counseling, no trial period! Just a simple cancellation. He just needs to end it no matter how much his daughter hurts or cries or pouts. It's called tough love. The pain that she will experience from ending this rishta will be a small trial compared to a life time of misery with an abusive husband.

[Disturb_angel]

He is continuously calling me ..jab mai call recieve kar rahi hun to he is saying me dat tumhari aukaaat (value) hi kia hai jo tum mujhay bharam dikha rahi hu and jao yahan say dafa hujao ..Ye kehnay k baad bhi baar baar he is calling main and agar main recieve nahi kar rahi tou wo meri sister k cell per call kar k keh rahay hain k meri fiancy say baat karwaye... :( and mujhay slangs derahay hain baar baar

[dildirani]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

Keep ignoring him and go tell your parents. Let them deal with it. Please don't put up with his abuse, you deserve better than that.

[Disturb_angel]

amir yes u r right ..These are the issues on which he fought to me ...
1) I cant live in karachi and want to live with him in dubai
2) If i will live in karachi in his absence i will never live with my Mil and i will live in my own home in his absence...
3) If he will also live with me in karachi then i will live with him whereever he wants me to live ...
4) I cant bear torturing and teasing sentences of his mother datzwhy its my wish to live seperately..
5) Un ki sister 2 months k liye apnay ghar mai rehti hain and unko koi interest nahi apnay hubby k saath rehnay mai datzwhy main roz roz kia unki sister ki hi care karti rahun ki susral mai beth kar??
In sab baaton ki wajah say hamari ye long lasting wali larai hui hai jo k ab sambhaalni bhi mushkil hurahi hai and ab mujhay bhi 50% is relation ka the end lag raha ha but mai aisa kabhi nahi chahti thie...

[Disturb_angel]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

yes dildirani now i want to ignores him as u all ppl are with me !

[Chipkali]

^^^:smack: Do you even READ what people advise you? Honestly Why did you have to listen to his abuse over your/your sister’s phone? Why don’t you hang up? Uff, forget it.

[Jaanwar]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

Disturb - Sweetheart it is fairly obvious that this thing is not going to work out. Stop worrying about it, gather up your courage and tell him to faak off.

[dildirani]

yes dildirani now i want to ignores him as u all ppl are with me !

Saab yahaan aap ko ignore nahi kar rahey. Yahaan laog aap ki madaad kar rahey hain.

Aap apnay fiance ko ignore kareyn aur apni ami aur abu ko iss baat mein shamil karo. Woh tumhari behtaari chahtay hain aur agar unn ko pata chala ke yeh saab kuch ho raha hai, unn ko bohat dukh ho ga. Unn ko ja kar batao. Woh khud saab kuch teek kar deyn gaye.

[amir_pindi]

D.A

thanx 4 clarifyig the issues.

Look its obvious the more your weakness and pasiveness is giving him more confidence and encouragement to continue and get even more dominating.

This wont stop..

no matter what u do....it seems it will oly stop when u absotley surrender yourself to as his robot wife.

None of your own actions are going to change things.

So stop hopeing for some out of the blue improvemnt form this guy.

Your tomrow will not change if you keep doing the same thing as yesterday.

It may bea big step for u, but you must get you father involved...and speak to him...and ask hi what his problme is why is he treatig y wiht so much disrespect.

Until you dont get a higher body involved obiusly everybod likes control and ego u two and ur sister r smaller than him he will not give you any importance.

YOULAST CHANCE TO SAVE THIS RELATION- TO KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO HIM-IF HE HAS SOME LEFT IN SOME CORNE ROF HIS HEAD.

PLEASE PLEASE SPEAK TO YOUR FATHER, YOU DONT HAVE TO SHOW HIM THE MAILS,BUT DO TELL HIM THE WHOLE DETAILS HOW HE IS DISRESPECTING YOU.

YOUR DAD MUST SPEAK TO HIM..

WHY DONT U GET IT GIRL!

THIS IS YOUR Last step left, im tellingyou. everibody her eis telling u to dumpy the guy, but im being somewhat empthatetic to you, because i know you have had long long relation with him, and want to save it somehow how hoping he comes through.

WHEN R U GOING TO TELL UR DAD.

WHAT THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN, YOULL GETA FEW SHOUTS/SCOLDS.

IM NOT GOING TO HELP U NOW, UNLESS U HELP URSELF.

TELL UR DAD.

READ NAMAZ, MAKE PRAYER THEN TAKE THE STEP. IF UR DAD GETS ANGRY AND WANTS TO CALL IT OFF, TELL HIM CALMLY FIRST YOU WANT TO GIVE IT ONE LAST CHANCE U WANT UR DAD TO SPEAK TO HIM AND CHECK AKIR WHATS IS IT THAT HE ACTING LIKE THIS LATELY.

I KNOW AND AGREE WITH EVRYONE, HE IS A BIG JERK. BUT U GOTTA BE A LITTLE CONSIDERATE TO EVRYONE, MAYBE HES TOO STREESED FROM WORK, HES MUM BRIANHWASHED, HES STRESSED OF HIS SISTERS IN-LAWS.
WE SHUD GIVE HIM ONE LAST THE RELATION ONE LAST TRY BEFORE CALLING IT.

GOD WILL DO BEST. READ NAMAZ AND CONFRONT UR PARENTS.

[Sara516]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

.

[amir_pindi]

Re: Feeling Tense and disturb today!

^ Thats was awkward

[Kinzz]

@Jaanwar

Disturb - Sweetheart it is fairly obvious that this thing is not going to work out. Stop worrying about it, gather up your courage and tell him to faak off.

u know....this is ur first post ever which i liked so far :D

[Sara516]

@amir_pindi

^ Thats was awkward

wasn’t me.

[Kinzz]

Saab yahaan aap ko ignore nahi kar rahey. Yahaan laog aap ki madaad kar rahey hain.

oh she means ke wo usay ignore kar rahi hai keu ke hum iske sath hain yahan...