Family Planning

[mirage]

Re: Family Planning

@Gemini_the_Great

mirage, I was working full time until Friday (my baby was born on Sunday), at my work I was out in teh field most of the day so I walked a lot.. I used to go for uphill walk everyday for an hour in the evening as apparently that helps with the stretching of pelvic muscles. I did kegels as much as I remembered to do it. I had taken natural birth classes and kind of knew what I wanted to do when it was time to push etc. I had no intention to go all natural as in no pain medication.. I took epidural at 8 inches (I went pretty fast and hard from 4-8 ) and then before you know it I was 10cm dilated, water broke, but baby was high up there!
I had him as sunny side up so I was doing lots of exercises on my hands and knees to turn him over.. I think the midwife told me that he did turn over at my 39 weeks appt. but 5 days later, when I was in labor, it turned out he was sunny side up again and I had the back labor!

I had read everything about natural birth but nothing about c section or recovery form it.. learned that the hardway! I still remember when we were in the hospital and I was having contractions, my husband said to me that if they ask for c section, we are going to say yes and not argue about it (he knew I was against it but didnt say that to me until I was in labor) and I just looked at him and said.. I have been in labor since yesterday, you think I am having a csection? I was soo wrong about it.. my mom thought I was delivering my baby inside since I was soooo close to the end until the alarms went off and docs rushed to our room and took me to OR.. honestly, you cant predict these things!

just be open and flexible (yes literally too :D) at the end of the day, it really doesnt matter how they come into this world.. it’s a pure joy! I remember docs saying, its a boy but I didnt hear him crying, like textbooks tell you, so I freaked out and didnt want to hear a thing after that but then I heard a whimper followed by a loud cry! the joy I felt at that moment cant be described in words.. ok I know I have distracted but you know, mommies gush like that

wont say much other than

[mirage]

Re: Family Planning

@somegroovychick

remember, with kids, its about quality (of life), not quantity (of kids)

THIS should be written on POSTERS and pasted all over on the walls in Pakistan and other under developed countries

[Kiwi007]

Family Planning

Some very valuable feed back girls thanks a lot and hearing some of the stories I think I’ll wait and re think the whole hari Bhari thing

[WendyDarling]

Re: Family Planning

@Kiwi007

Some very valuable feed back girls thanks a lot and hearing some of the stories I think I’ll wait and re think the whole hari Bhari thing

You can still have your hari bhari family, just don’t need to have the kids so close together

[somegroovychick]

Re: Family Planning

^ that.
and also, you don't need 4 kids to have a hari bhari fam. you could have 2 really active ones! ;)

[mrscupcake]

Re: Family Planning

I love a hari bhari family

[mirage]

Re: Family Planning

^ and you will have one, in sha Allah

[mrscupcake]

Re: Family Planning

Thanks Hun, In sha Allah. Just remember in Dua's.

[zayma]

Re: Family Planning

1 year is not a health risk but i remember my mum telling me that because she had me and my sis a year apart the dc told her not to have another child for a few years because she was quite young and she was losing alot of blood or whatever the reason was i personally think the best age gap between children is 2 years :)

[automne77]

I had my first after 48 hours in labor, he was sunny side up but he was turned around by forceps. Breastfeeding was a nightmare. I got pregnant when he was 1.25 years old and my second is exactly 2 years younger than tge older one. It was a c e- section, I wanted kids close in age I never imagined tgat I would have a c section so recovery was hard.

I wanted 4 kids too but the thing tgat stops me now is will there be a healthy and active me to raise my kids?

Both my kids suffered during my recovery period from a c section.

[sarad]

Re: Family Planning

I have 2 kids 2.5 yrs apart and just like OP I used to think I will have 4 kids (not in 5 years though, never wanted them so close together).
I do not want to have another child until my kids are atleast a little older. If I could afford a nanny, I may have had another kid in a couple of years (if Allah willed) but taking care of the 2 I have takes away all the time and energy I have. With the toddler going to pre-school I need to help him with whatever he is studying as well.
I am sure many women do it and do a really good job but I find that a job, house chores, kids and then their studies is a lot of work.

[nabz]

Re: Family Planning

^ why in 5 years? how old are you?

[Kiwi007]

Re: Family Planning

@automne77

I had my first after 48 hours in labor, he was sunny side up but he was turned around by forceps. Breastfeeding was a nightmare. I got pregnant when he was 1.25 years old and my second is exactly 2 years younger than tge older one. It was a c e- section, I wanted kids close in age I never imagined tgat I would have a c section so recovery was hard.
I wanted 4 kids too but the thing tgat stops me now is will there be a healthy and active me to raise my kids?
Both my kids suffered during my recovery period from a c section.

What kind of recovery is required from a C - section

[sarad]

Re: Family Planning

^ C-section = surgery so more recovery time. Time needed for the stitches to heal completely

[somegroovychick]

Re: Family Planning

^ C-section = major abdominal surgery. this ain't no paper cut! 6 weeks until you are able to move around normally and up to 18 months for the internal stitches to properly heal. its painful.

[Paheli00]

Re: Family Planning

@somegroovychick

^ C-section = major abdominal surgery. this ain't no paper cut! 6 weeks until you are able to move around normally and up to 18 months for the internal stitches to properly heal. its painful.

^ Yep, all this assuming that no other compilcations happen during or after the surgery.

[somegroovychick]

Re: Family Planning

^ exactly. i had super low blood pressure after mine and was very ill, another friend almost died on the table because she had complications too. its not an ideal way of giving birth at all.

[kakee]

Re: Family Planning

Well if you want to then go for it.
My SOs cousin has 6 daughters their close in age and all girls and very beautiful.
Its amazing how she does it. I have a lot of respect for her.

Its kind of rare nowadays for an educated family to have multiple children (4+) because usually they only want 1 or 2, three at most.
Lets face it kids are expensive, if you're not wealthy its not going to be easy raising 4 kids by yourself. Personally I would feel sorry for any pregnant mother who is by herself taking care of Baby A, while Baby C is having a tantrum in the department store and Baby B is walking off.
Kids are not angels, any mother will tell you that.
They are only cute on the outside :P
besides can you imagine three toddlers against you? oh the horror, the horror

[kakee]

Re: Family Planning

@mirage

THIS should be written on POSTERS and pasted all over on the walls in Pakistan and other under developed countries

O.o
What are you talking about Mirage

You do know people have multiple children because they are uneducated and poor therefor they need the manpower?
Why do you think your parents/grand parents have so many siblings o.O Just for fun? No, they sent them out to work as soon as they were able to.

I’m sorry but it makes my blood boil when somebody thinks like that. =/ Unfortunately not all kids have luxury of having loving homes with endless money and free education.

[WendyDarling]

Re: Family Planning

@kakee

O.o
What are you talking about Mirage

You do know people have multiple children because they are uneducated and poor therefor they need the manpower?
.

what if they just like kids?? I always wanted a bunch of kids .. what does that make me