Re: Family favors
oh and another frequent requests that I get from my relatives
“XXXXXX zara XXXX tu buy ker doo online Amazon sai ..main tum ko cash dai doon ga/doon gi”
when I ask “why dont you buy it yourself?”
answer is "its not safe …mujhey dar lagta hai apna CC number web per daitey howey. tum tu shopping kertey rehtey hoo "
for heaven sake and you are asking me to give my cc number when you think its not safe for you? btw, I dont have any problem with that
Jus spoilt. ALL men are spoilt in our culture. And kids oh my if you DARE to tell off your little cousin prepare to get a ear full about it. Its ridiculous. All my family think I'M the rude one for telling off my YOUNGER cousins.
get of your pedestal you stupid little girl.
they had me do that too.
I had to buy some retarded book off amazon for him - nevermind the fact that by the time it gets here, he will be gone.
I was telling him to give the name of the book to me earlier, but he took his sweet time. Oh well.
Re: Family favors
Their kid is out of control.
If the girls closet themselves in a room to watch a movie, because they dont want to be bothered by his interference, he is now taken up kicking the door with his foot.
He has broken a few things.
He nearly broke the chair climbing into it, as oppose to pulling it out like a normal person.
Yes, my mother should probably lay down the rules and just tell the family - look, he can’t break stuff, and if he does, you are fixing it, and you are paying for it.
But 1. he is her brother
2. if anyone complains about the kid, the dad’s response is to beat him up - like literally, you here this little boy screaming from the beatings.
So, my mother chooses not to yell at him or tell him to stop, because she knows her brother will go a-wall on his kids and she doesn’t want the kids to be physically beaten under her roof.
Oh and more. So, this family is using my bathroom. I’ve taken up living out of my parents bathroom. 6 people - using my bathroom. They have plugged up the toilet and it wasn’t flushing. So, guess what this uncle does? He hands my sister the plunger and tells her it is plugged up. She’s like…um, YOU are plunging it. Hands the plunger back to him. The whole night he complained about how we have cheap toilets.
He also told my father to his face how our tiles on the floor are of the cheap variety. Made some comments about the house as well, like how small it is. 
My father is just so in pain from this guy’s arrogance, and he can’t say anything, because he doesn’t want to hurt his wife if he goes off on her brother.
The whole household is tense. They know we are getting tired of their kid. They are tired of living in such a cramped space.
I have a feeling there will be a big emotional explosion before they leave, though.
He did this with me, and my sister is telling me tonight that he did this with her as well: guy can’t make a phone call and deal with being put on hold. He’s on hold for a solid 2 min and hands my sister the phone and says, these people aren’t talking to me, do something.
???
I’m just confused. How do people like this have jobs in Pakistan?
Re: Family favors
Wow PCG. Your uncle & family deserve their own sitcom. Remarkably repugnant especially the little spoiled brat. Reminds me of Dudley of Harry Potter books.
But your parents are really angels. :k:
In some of your posts you make it sound like your cousin old enough to go to college (or almost) and in posts like this, you make it sound like he’s younger than 7. Well, for that type of child, I have no patience. If he’s going to get a beating if I complain about his behavior to his parents, that isn’t going to stop me.
He’s going to go AWOL on them? (absence without leave).
Did he manage to clear it up? He’s got a point though. Toilets here get blocked very easily, especially compared to what they use at home.
Seeing her brother’s behavior, I don’t think she wouldn’t fully support him if he were to say anything.
Well, I hope everything works out with minimum damage, physical or otherwise. No matter how bad you think he is, you can see that PunjabiRose here has it much worse, so we should at least be thankful that our relatives aren’t like that, Alhamdulillah.
Re: Family favors
Doesn't going a-wall (sp?) also mean going ballistic?
The kid is 12. He is developmentally delayed because of brain damage from seizures after birth.
He can still be disciplined though. His father says he doesn't want to impose rules on the kid because the kid won't open up then. Whatever. This family is psycho. To come to your sister's home and diss her tiles and toilets...that's ridiculous.
So I asked where the tiles popped up from and I was told that the comment was :
"so, xyz in Pakistan is building a new home from his fathers money and he is putting in x type of tiles, not the cheap type of tiles you guys have"
???
How can you say that to your sister's face?
Re: Family favors
PCG, your parents are enablers. They are allowing the brother and his kid to take advantage of them and being doormats for them. And although they have the very best of good intentions, they are harming both the brother and his kid by enabling all of their destructive behavior to continue.
When you have a child with a developmental issue, you have to structure rules and guidelines SO much more than you do with typically developing kids. They CAN learn, they just need it to be much more structured and broken down into easier to follow directions. If this is done, there is such a better chance for their future. By giving in and letting things "go", the kid will never thrive and never fit in. What will become of him in his later years? Parents dont live forever.
And the freeloading brother. He needs to realize that just because he's the youngest brother, he STILL needs to grow up and take responsibility for himself and his child. He will never do this as long as he has your mom to take care of him and his every want.
But things will not change one whit unless and until your mom and dad stop being doormats for these people.
Doesn't going a-wall (sp?) also mean going ballistic?
The kid is 12. He is developmentally delayed because of brain damage from seizures after birth.
He can still be disciplined though. His father says he doesn't want to impose rules on the kid because the kid won't open up then. Whatever. This family is psycho. To come to your sister's home and diss her tiles and toilets...that's ridiculous.
So I asked where the tiles popped up from and I was told that the comment was : "so, xyz in Pakistan is building a new home from his fathers money and he is putting in x type of tiles, not the cheap type of tiles you guys have"
???
How can you say that to your sister's face?
I've only known AWOL to mean absent without leave. Even with the conditions your cousin has, his father should be even more careful when in other people's house.
From what you're saying about the toilet and tiles, I think he may be talking about what he sees here in general and not specifically in your house.
Re: Family favors
That's the thing I was telling my dad this morning in the car. There is NO reason to buy the iPhone for the older son. There is no reason not to ask the parents directly to control their kid more because already things are breaking in the house and that we don't have the extra cash to fix things.
I have directly told them :
he needs to be taught sign language as he has a motor problem so he cannot form words with his mouth. He says a total of like 20 words which you can barely make out. I told them they need to start sign language. They refuse completely saying it will interfere in his ability to learn more words. They are in denial and expect that eventually he will talk normally. We took him to the doctor and the docs tell him the same. The father is stubborn a d doesn't listen.
We have all brought up the topic of tougher discipline. He doesn't agree with that philosophy.
So the kid is acting out because he doesn't have language and the ability to express verbally. So when he wants attention NOW, he will bang doors, pull your hand and butt into conversations screaming.
Re: Family favors
The comments about the house are about us. YOUR toilets. YOUR tiles.
Oh and did I mention they want to move here eventually and yet every night they whine about how bad America is?? Really difficult for me to take because I'm a pretty patriotic American. I've told them off on that a few times. They do not care.
From you're previous posts, it doesn't seem to me like they're really serious about moving. They might think about it for a few minutes here and there but I don't see it happening from what you've described about them.
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It will when and if Karachi turns into Swat.
The bombings are really scaring them. They want to move so the smaller kid can be in a school here because of the ESE curriculum. They want the older kid to go for college here. We suggested the older one just stay here for education for the time being but his dad wants him to go back and finish unversity there.
???
I told him it doesn't make sense and he will lose yrs in education unnecessarily because he will repeat a lot of that coursework here.
Whole family is warped. They make no sense.
Is he already in university? I know that with a bachelor's degree from there, you can get into a Master's or PhD program here. Then again, I'm living in Canada so it might be a bit different in the US.
They might be scared but you make him sound like someone to indecisive to do it (as opposed to wanting it, thinking about it). I mean they just made you spend $6k on a lawyer and weren't sure what they wanted.
Re: Family favors
I’m not sure what is going on in his
mind. They have a nice home there, servants, and a good job. The prospects for his kids are not great. But that’s more their own fault than anything else. So he doesn’t want to leave and come here because he will have to work like a dog here and he will have no status in society like he has there.
But there is only one speech therapist in Karachi (??) and the school the disabled kid attends isn’t great. So they want better opportunities for the younger kid.
If I were him, I’d at least kick out the older son for
education.
Not sure how the system works but atthe same time, this spoiled family hasn’t even called a university admissions counselor for some direction. I guess they don’t want to be bothered by being put on hold.
Re: Family favors
so why dont you clean YOUR toilet PCG? 
Re: Family favors
Wow, this is some serious ........ n e ways on one hand i do see moving away from karachi is a good thing for them but if they do they will be hugely dependent on your family, why don`t you suggest them to move them to canada, since a lotta things here are easier i mean ease in getting immigration, free skools and a much more relaxed environment compared to US, this way they get to move to a safer place and your uncle can keep his status back in pakistan and settle his family here as well as the fact that they are off your back.
Re: Family favors
Yeah. You try suggesting that to them.
The father used to go to college here when he was younger. He wants the American label but no responsibility that goes with it.
That's why I ask. Are folks in Pakistan just too spoiled to deal with a more independent lifestyle here? I feel like an effin naukrani .
Re: Family favors
PCG, the younger kid is really the one who would benefit most from being here. Special Ed in public schools would be so helpful to both child AND parent. My 8 year old is only delayed with his speech, he's conversational - yet he gets one-on-one speech therapy three times a week in a public school. Other kids who are more delayed get more than that and also get assistive technology - like PICS which is a speech tool used to both promote communication and boost spoken language using pictures. Its really amazing the things that the public schools offer now to special kids. Many of whom can go on to participate in mainstream classes at some point.
But....none of that will happen as long as your mom is their doormat and allows "Uncle" to freeload till your mom and dad cant take it anymore. Time for your mom to help her brother grow up. Really. Your mom is the one who needs to take the initiative here. And it doesnt have to be a nasty fight, it just needs to be a sister helping her brother grow up.
seriously start messing with their head, give your aunty horror stories of bigray huay desi bachay who came here at a young age or even started college here, aur haan about uncles driving cabs and security jobs etc. khair jo jiss ke qismat hai ussko woh milega, but i wish you good luck and sabar and ohh yeah now go take them shopping to the mall, they might need soming and while you are at it pay for them as well :k: