Thats all great advice guys. thanks! My fiance and I are very close so I have no issues just asking him. Plus I'm very open about how I feel about these things and as my family would put it, "mujhay baat karni aati hai" lol.... without hurting anyone's feelings. So I'll be sure to get things done right. And I dont have a SIL. lol.. he has all brothers:p and they're younger than him, unmarried. So basically, its their first time. And I am the youngest in my family and all 3 brothers are older and married so we're the experienced side. Lol!
Chalo, Allah behtar karay ga.
Thanks chickees!
Since i am in the US and my PIL were coming from Pak for the wedding, they asked what colors i wanted and style of dress and brought what they thought was best. In the end, the valima dress was churidaar and frock/pishwaz type in ferozi/blue and shocking pink. It wasnt waht i would have chosen myself but it still looked nice and every one who saw me that day or the pics really liked the dress.
I wasnt too keen on some of the dresses they brought either but then i realised that on their end htey bought what they thought was best. If i have problems with it, i can always have hubs buy me more clothes. My MIL had also sent my nikah outfit which was a real pretty tea pnk shalwar kameez.
Jewellery wise, i chose my own gold jewellery since we bought it in the US and hubs took me with him. The valima jewellery, my MIL brought two sets for me to choose from and i am glad she did. Same with shoes.
Though my MIL had my clothes made for mangni, shadi, and valima, I wore the set that my mother and nani designed for the shadi. It matched nicely and my MIL left it totally open.
me and my fiance are really close, so he said that when he'll be back we'll go shopping together and then i can buy anything i want but offcourse i wud take care of his choice as well..
Thanks for the advice girls!
See, I dont really care much about the jewelry or "bari". I just want the valima dress to be awesome. I'm sure when the time comes, my MIL to be will be my partner in crime:p
I'm sure you all feel the same way.. i mean you're only getting married once and I want all 3 days to be perfect! :)
its so nice to hear about everyones experiences.. i had this huge drama at my engagement cos i wanted to choose my ring (my in laws kicked up a huge fuss).. & i was told i would be wearing a certain colour & the day b4 my in laws came over with a red lehnga :( with this huuuggeee atrificial set.. i cried so much! but wore it with a smile- but they knew i wasnt happy as i did say i didnt want to luk like a bride on my engagement... so now iv learnt to keep my mouth shut...just go with the flow, iv found that things like this can create huge problems... im really happy for all u girls, do dua that my valima outfit is nice- whatever the colour they decide to put on me...sigh
i chose my own - they always insisted but i kinda made it clear that i was a fussy cow! chose my lengha, reasonable priced one. then when we got to the UK I went with them and chose a few sets i liked, they finalised that and got it matched for me. I was a pain, but they look back and think the fuss was worth the while!
yes she did, it wasn't too bad, but it showed that she cared, poor thing went 100 times to bazar to get my bari/dress/jew/shoes/makeup made and that made me realised that she cared for me, her one leg and one eye is bad from an accident, so imagine her struggling in the bazar with loads of stuff to carry...aww
u know of course she could have given me the money had i been in pakistan to get my own stuff but would it still feel the same that it came from her own effort and heart? its a big day for the MIL too, after all they are giving their son, they BORN and RAISED to another female, so its fair that they get their share on the wedding celebrations and get a choice to pick at least one wedding outfit for the bride.
All these girls who are saying they want to pick their own vilima dress, lets see how they react with its their turn to be MIL and wed their SON?
yes she did, it wasn't too bad, but it showed that she cared, poor thing went 100 times to bazar to get my bari/dress/jew/shoes/makeup made and that made me realised that she cared for me, her one leg and one eye is bad from an accident, so imagine her struggling in the bazar with loads of stuff to carry...aww
u know of course she could have given me the money had i been in pakistan to get my own stuff but would it still feel the same that it came from her own effort and heart? its a big day for the MIL too, after all they are giving their son, they BORN and RAISED to another female, so its fair that they get their share on the wedding celebrations and get a choice to pick at least one wedding outfit for the bride.
All these girls who are saying they want to pick their own vilima dress, lets see how they react with its their turn to be MIL and wed their SON?
Im gonna start a new riwaJ and pick out everything if i have a daughter/son. Since i nver got to be in wedding prep stuff :@:
Well my in laws ordered everything from India and I was so nervous as I was patiently awaiting my dress for almost a month. It came in yesterday and hubby and sis in law came over my house to show it to me and MA i loved it. My MIL really has good taste. Besides the fact that it was so gosh darn expensive it was perfect.
yes she did, it wasn't too bad, but it showed that she cared, poor thing went 100 times to bazar to get my bari/dress/jew/shoes/makeup made and that made me realised that she cared for me, her one leg and one eye is bad from an accident, so imagine her struggling in the bazar with loads of stuff to carry...aww
u know of course she could have given me the money had i been in pakistan to get my own stuff but would it still feel the same that it came from her own effort and heart? its a big day for the MIL too, after all they are giving their son, they BORN and RAISED to another female, so its fair that they get their share on the wedding celebrations and get a choice to pick at least one wedding outfit for the bride.
All these girls who are saying they want to pick their own vilima dress, lets see how they react with its their turn to be MIL and wed their SON?
I see your point, but I dont really see why it cant be done together? Dont you agree? I mean if its all about family, happiness and bonding, than its a perfect way to bond! lol... plus at the end of it all, both parties come out happy.
what'd ya say?:p
