Re: confused!!!
belle- you just need to inform the mother and I am sure she will take care of the rest. She can even go to a Pakistani court for custody , the girl is 11 years old and her consent will also matter now.
Re: confused!!!
As long as he is not abusing the child in any way, then stay out of it. It is his own daughter after all he has a right to decide how he wants to raise her. Western custody laws are often very cruel in terms of visiting rights for fathers. This is really none of your business. It is the mans daughter. Besides, girls can be more prone to abuse from their mothers boyfriends or husbands. People who grow up in single parent households in the West, almost always end up very messed up.
Also I don't know about Pakistani citizenship law, but since her father is a Pakistani citizen I am assuming the child could automatically be considered a citizen too, if that is the case the German Embassy can't do anything.
You raised a good point here.
A man as the father can better protect his daughter from other boys and men than a woman as a mother.
Re: confused!!!
I agree that a father can protect his daughter well BUT he should have claimed for the permanent custody instead bringing the girl to PAK without informing the mother?
Re: confused!!!
You raised a good point here. A man as the father can better protect his daughter from other boys and men than a woman as a mother.
but my question is mother of the girl a muslim?
according to islam father gets the custody of children.....
but his wife should be a muslim.............
Re: confused!!!
I agree that a father can protect his daughter well BUT he should have claimed for the permanent custody instead bringing the girl to PAK without informing the mother?
Really belledonne, it's none of your business.
Unless he is beating or GOD forbid, sexually abusing his child, don't get involved.
Re: confused!!!
u ppl should read about an indian couple who r deprived of their own childrens under the pretext that parents not properly taking care of their children......
this happened in norway so we can not always count on these western laws.....
p.s.these children r indian passport holders,i ll post a link soon
Re: confused!!!
I agree that a father can protect his daughter well BUT he should have claimed for the permanent custody instead bringing the girl to PAK without informing the mother?
You mentioned earlier that you're a mother....so as a mother....you can imagine what the girl's mother must be feeling right now. The girl's mother doesn't even know whether or not her own daughter is dead or alive. You can also imagine how YOUR child would feel if he/she was separated from you all of a sudden.
I think you, as a mother, know what's the "right" thing to do in this situation already. You've already been given quite a bit of advice on how to help the girl. You don't need to explain or debate with anyone here. You have the necesssary info. Now it's upto you to follow your heart and decide whether or not you want to help this little girl reunite with her mother. Remember at the end of the day....choose a decision that will allow you to live life (and look at the faces of your own children) with a clear conscience.
Re: confused!!!
Really belledonne, it's none of your business.
Unless he is beating or GOD forbid, sexually abusing his child, don't get involved.
this is the reason y people have got so much guts and dont think before doing a crime becuz they know its none of anybodys business and no one is going to do nything..
Re: confused!!!
You mentioned earlier that you're a mother....so as a mother....you can imagine what the girl's mother must be feeling right now. The girl's mother doesn't even know whether or not her own daughter is dead or alive. You can also imagine how YOUR child would feel if he/she was separated from you all of a sudden.
I think you, as a mother, know what's the "right" thing to do in this situation already. You've already been given quite a bit of advice on how to help the girl. You don't need to explain or debate with anyone here. You have the necesssary info. Now it's upto you to follow your heart and decide whether or not you want to help this little girl reunite with her mother. Remember at the end of the day....choose a decision that will allow you to live life (and look at the faces of your own children) with a clear conscience.
Thanks a lot for clearing my mind...
Re: confused!!!
I agree that a father can protect his daughter well BUT he should have claimed for the permanent custody instead bringing the girl to PAK without informing the mother?
I think that has to do with the law which needs to observed. No argument there.
He left the country. Somehow he produced the travel document of the girl while traveling. Most likely the passport. Somehow he was let go.
The information you provided is not enough to say anything about if he did something wrong or right. Maybe his ex-wife does not want to pursue the case.
Complete information is not known about the case at the moment.
You better be sure you are not being involved in something which has nothing wrong.
but my question is mother of the girl a muslim?
according to islam father gets the custody of children.....
but his wife should be a muslim.............
I don't think the discussion should be about religion here. Who is muslim who is not really does not matter. Right? :)
Regardless of a man be a muslim or not, the man is better protector of his daughter. Not saying the ideal/perfect always, but better.
Re: confused!!!
^^^ Of course it matters, if the father is a good Muslim then definitely the child will be better of with him. As a Muslim father it is his responsibility to ensure his daughter is raised in a healthy Islamic environment.
Have you seen the condition of these kids who grow up with these single moms in the West? I have, and it's not good.
Again it's none of your business, complain all you want I doubt anything is going to happen. The Germans are not going to send a swat team to take the child back to Germany, Pakistani courts are very slow and corrupt, nothing will happen. The child is also likely a Pakistani national as per the father.
You are just poking your nose where it doesn't belong, and demonizing the father along the way.
Again it's his child, not yours, he knows the mother and her situation in Germany much better than you.
Re: confused!!!
Re: confused!!!
but as much i know if woman is muslim she will have custody of child .....
until the girl is mature enough to learn all the things of women from her mother
Re: confused!!!
^^^ Of course it matters, if the father is a good Muslim then definitely the child will be better of with him. As a Muslim father it is his responsibility to ensure his daughter is raised in a healthy Islamic environment.
....
Just FYI: Daughter of devout muslim father can still be irreligious.
I only talked about protection, not growing as muslim/religious or not.
Re: confused!!!
Do you live in Pakistan, Belledonne? Can you manage to visit your husband's cousin? At least you can give some comfort to the child. (And get the address...)
Re: confused!!!
yes i do live Pakistan, the problem is i cant go and meet her as her village is at distant from my husband's village and there i cannot just get up go anywhere...
I think i can also provide them the flight timing and they can trace out all the information from his passport, his address and all..
I was twelve when my father did same this with us all his relatives were with him because they find servants free of cost nobody agreed to help us, i know that nobody is going to help her and she is definately going to miss her mother a lot, may b not in the strating days as she will be meeting new people...but after some time she is definately going to feel it
Re: confused!!!
belledone follow what Paheli has said and ignore the posters here and request for this thread to be closed. You are not answerable to anyone over here.
Re: confused!!!
ok diamond321
mods i request you to kindly close this thread as i have got my answer, i am going to follow my heart*
Re: confused!!!
A while ago someone opened similar thread and it also had many inconsistencies. 
^^^ Of course it matters, if the father is a good Muslim then definitely the child will be better of with him. As a Muslim father it is his responsibility to ensure his daughter is raised in a healthy Islamic environment.
Have you seen the condition of these kids who grow up with these single moms in the West? I have, and it's not good.
You're assumptions are very broad
Ok so say her mother is not muslim that makes her a bad person? Incapable of raising a child with standards.?! Seriously? Just because he said he doesnt want her growing up with the mum u assume hes a good muslim.? Maybe he is just afraid he wont be able to control his child as he wishes and pleases. Has anyone thought what the child wants.? He should have bloody thought about how he wants his kids raised before marrying a western woman and having child with her. Or was he just looking for a passport.?
Secondly you say that kids raised in the west by single mums are raised in questionable conditions.? Statistics please. I was raised by my mother after my father died my brother was 1 and i had siblings ranging from 4-15 i was 17 at the time and my mother coped fine and we have the freedom we see as acceptable and mashallah wer uni graduates and in college school etc. just because u have seen a few cases doesnt mean single moms in the west are not capable at all.!
OP Speak with your husband and try to find out more about the situation without making it sound like ur the pne whose going to report the cousin. Also if she has been taken without mothers permission it needs to be reported.