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^ yeayeayea, im leaving someone else to argue with your incredibubbly sarcastic post.
back to writing abt reverse mergers :hinna:
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^haha yeh i will pretty much pass just wanna ask,
our women really have progressed and for that their inlaws have to be mean to them? obviously mirch, ur a guy that's why you would say something as backwards as that.
I don't think they have any right to tell you what to do and not to on your wedding day, esp since they're not paying a single dime of it. It's your own family function they have no reason to butt in.
Its not about who has the right, its about doing whats right...
PSquared, I hope both you and your husband's family will be happy with whatever you decide to do
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oh ho - the girl wants to dance till 4 a.m - let her dance. Baqi zindigi "ji haan" kar kay guzaar lay gi :)
Its not about who has the right, its about doing whats right...
PSquared, I hope both you and your husband's family will be happy with whatever you decide to do
and I don't think it's right for anyone to force their choice on someone else.
The in laws have the right to not participate in any function. But they don't have the right to forbid the other side in from participating in anything on their own. especially when it's not their money or time at stake here.
i don’t think anyone has the right to force their choice on someone else.
it’s really not that difficult.
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PS, What does your fiance think of all this?
i don't think anyone has the right to force their choice on someone else.
it's really not that difficult.
Yeah I agree , they should implement democracy and take votes of both the families and the majority vote should decide as to mehndi or no mehndi , dances or no dances etc etc. :D
Mirch Bhai, I really respect my in-laws thats why Im so confused about this issue! I dnt want them to think Im someone who would scoff at charity because of my own selfish demands but thats how I feel when they asked me to donate all of the money I would spend. I feel like Im being a brat.
Im thinking of doing something small. I wont go grand and keep it modest.
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^Seriously PS, they cannot tell you where your family should be spending their money, that's just not right. Like alot of people said, do what you want to, it's YOUR wedding.
Mirch Bhai, I really respect my in-laws thats why Im so confused about this issue! I dnt want them to think Im someone who would scoff at charity because of my own selfish demands but thats how I feel when they asked me to donate all of the money I would spend. I feel like Im being a brat.
Im thinking of doing something small. I wont go grand and keep it modest.
By all means go for it , if you think that they will be ok with it. If you think that it can create problems for you then better safe than sorry.
It is not war of wits.
On a personal note I would try to find out beforehand if they would be ok with my lifestyle , my belief system and my family values before finalizaing a rishta. In my own wedding we had all kinds of parties and rasoomat and lots of halla gulla , lots of fun.
CE!!! Ohmigosh, congratulations hun!!! 
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Today:
My fiance talked to his parents about it and they will not be taking any part in it financially (initially, we had proposed a joint mehndi because we thought they would be having one too - just to make it easier). Thats perfectly fine. They're very nice people though...my FIL said if she wants to have one and invites us...we will definitely come.
My fiance agrees with his parents and thats fine.
My family (esp my mom) is all for mehndis so they are rooting for it and have already started shopping around for things.
This is what I think Ill do: Ive got to compromise a little bit because so far, its been whatever I want. Initially, my mehndi guest list was turning out to be 150 people. Im going to cut that in half and only have close family and friends. We're still going to have to get a separate venue for it though. The thought of 60 people in my house in June's heat? Yikes!
Overall, we're going to make it small and intimate but very nice. :)
By all means go for it , if you think that they will be ok with it. If you think that it can create problems for you then better safe than sorry. It is not war of wits. On a personal note I would try to find out beforehand if they would be ok with my lifestyle , my belief system and my family values before finalizaing a rishta. In my own wedding we had all kinds of parties and rasoomat and lots of halla gulla , lots of fun.
They're a little more conservative than we are, thats for sure. So far, they've never stopped me from doing anything or said no to me. This is the only issue they have a problem with. Another thing is, they only visit the US every few months. They dont live here because they have a very comfortable life in Pak, Mashallah.
^Seriously PS, they cannot tell you where your family should be spending their money, that's just not right. Like alot of people said, do what you want to, it's YOUR wedding.
You're right. I cant take out the mehndi altogether...Im going to have A LOT of angry people at the wedding if I do that!!!!
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PS, hope u'll have a wonderful Mehndi, have fun...
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VZ, thank you!!!!!!!! Im so excited, cant wait!!!! :)
My mom called me besharam today man...lol
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No way! Do the mehndi. You're not asking your inlaws to pay for it. Or do the mehndi and do a collection at the mehndi to give to charity. They have to respect your khandani rawaj too. If my friend was getting married and said she couldn't do a mehndi, I'd be BUMMED! I only really get involved in a shaadi for the mehndi, the rest is kinda boring.
They're a little more conservative than we are, thats for sure. So far, they've never stopped me from doing anything or said no to me. This is the only issue they have a problem with. Another thing is, they only visit the US every few months. They dont live here because they have a very comfortable life in Pak, Mashallah.
I am glad you guys had the talk with the inlaws. i think inshallah everything will be fine, i mean ur respecting them by not forcing them to have a mehndi and they should repect that. and recpect ur wishes to have one. I hope everything works outs.
Good Luck!