Bahu Obligations and the Joint Family System

Lifestyle Relationships
81

Re: why...

Stop getting YOUR information from bs sites. The hadith that you keep referring to about prostration has no authenticity. Think before you write such pathetic things. This hadith has largely been propagated by male chauvinists and is not reliable AT ALL. There is not a single well known Islamic scholar who has acknowledged this hadith.

Even the haidth regarding Aisha (RA) is not authentic. These hadiths are just skewed statements propagated by men who are just too insecure with their masculinity and need to make up religious sources out of thin air. Stop googling and pasting whatever you can find to support your childish claims.

I know you don't have very strong research skills since you're divorced precisely because of that but please in the future do focus on your research skills. They'll help you a lot and avoid future divorces for you.

Also stop swearing "by God"...do you think writing "by God" makes us believe your bs? And we are all positive that your ex is grateful to God everyday for getting rid of such an ignorant, illiterate guy like you.

And as others have asked you repeatedly, do you agree with having your mom treated by your father the same way you think all women should be treated? Is your mom disposable for your father? Did your mother live with her in-laws?

By the way, where was your religion when you were busy doing every girl back in the days? Since you have admitted to committing fornication are you ready for this?

Surah 24 (An-Núr), Verse 2:
“The woman and the man guilty of adultery or fornication,- flog each of them with a hundred stripes: Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: and let a party of the Believers witness their punishment."

82

Re: why...

I know a case of my relative where you cannot blame the girl (daughter-in-law) for such a demand and behaviour

some parents-in-law hotay hi aise hain ke aapka tolerance level khatam ho jae

anyway my own opinion is, if the son is the only child or the only son, then the bahu should try her best to bardaasht her in-laws, because after all agar bhudday maa baap ki unka beta nahi karega to aur kon karega

83

Re: why...

He already did "taubah" after he got that out of his system. once he banged all the hot chicks on his campus (supposedly), he repented and God forgave him and blessed him with a hot 19 year old virgin sent from heaven who came with no annoying pakistani cultural baggage and massages his feet! but those women he banged before marriage are hellbound though and have no izzat now...

84

Re: why...

^^^ AHAHA you are obviously a non muslim kafir, or a just a Muslim by name, who cares what you have to say? Why would any Muslim listen to you? You probably don't even wear hijab.

You had nothing to say to the Quranic verses I posted.

Quran clearly tells women to obey and puts husband in charge of them, and hadith clearly says that for a husband his mother comes before any wife, and for a woman its her husband, simple.

I have clearly laid out my case, now if you want to state that the hadith is made up or the Quran should not be taken literally, Astaghfirulla, then I can't debate with you.

But I was speaking to mainstream Pakistani Muslim Men of the Sunni sect, they know what I have posted is authentic and valid.

I don't care if I live in America, or have a blue passport. It doesn't mean I have to give up my culture or religion. There are many good Muslim women here who know the role of a wife.

Even in Pakistan girls from good educated families also know their role, my mom is a doctor yet she worked and took care of my dads parents. Her father prefers his sons to do that for him. Simple.

If you go to NY, Buffalo, Staten Island etc...its full of religious Islamic communities and women in niqabs, America is very diverse lady, not every Woman fits into your liberal feminist mode!

*Like I said, I am passionate about this topic because I have experienced it. No girl on earth is worth causing sadness to your mom and dad. If as a son they want your company, then you owe it to them, as they were there for you when you were a child.
*

Make your mom and dad happy, it is your paradise, where you will get far more better wives than anything here on earth, inshallah.

I would like to end this debate where I am destroying all these feminists, by reminding Muslim brothers once again, what our dear and beloved prophet (PBUH) said.

Ayisha (R) reported that when they asked the **prophet* to whom was a woman most obliged, he said “to her husband”, when we asked to whom is a man most obliged to, he said "to his mother".*

12.Reported by al-Bazzar with a hasan isnad. See Majma’ al-Zawa’id, 4/308, Bab haqq al-zawj ‘ala’l-mar’ah.

85

Re: why...

I wouldn't just post some random hadith. The mosque I go to is pretty mainstream, Lebanese, Pakistanis, Afghans, Blacks etc.. the imam of that mosque is a mainstream sunni from hanafi madhab, he stated this from his own mouth.

I have read the thing said by hazrat ayesha in couple of different Islamic books written by scholars, I think I'd rather take these peoples word over some feminist people who want to try and change Islam to conform to the West.

You are acting as if the hadiths are daif or matu, hasan hadith means "pretty good"

[QUOTE]
By the way, where was your religion when you were busy doing every girl back in the days? Since you have admitted to committing fornication are you ready for this?

[QUOTE]
Surah 24 (An-Núr), Verse 2:
“The woman and the man guilty of adultery or fornication,- flog each of them with a hundred stripes: Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: and let a party of the Believers witness their punishment."
[/QUOTE]

[/QUOTE]

If you knew anything at all you would know in Islam to prove fornication one would need 4 witnesses, to justify such a harsh punishment!! No Islamic court is just going to dish this kind of thing out.

Allah also states in Quran that All sins are forgivable, its best to make taubah and not do it again, Allah is most merciful, are you trying to challenge his mercy? Astaghfirulla

86

Re: why...

says the guy who has committed fornication many times.....why should any muslim woman listen to someone who has committed zina?
and yes im not a muslim but im not being a hypocrite here, you are.

[quote]
You had nothing to say to the Quranic verses I posted.
[/quote]

Ok so lets talk about Quran then.

024.003
**Let no man guilty of adultery or fornication marry and but a woman similarly guilty,* or an Unbeliever: nor let any but such a man or an Unbeliever marry such a woman: to the Believers such a thing is forbidden.*

If you are guilty of fornication, you cannot marry a chaste virgin woman because chaste women are only for chaste men you twisted hypocrite. fornicators can only marry fornicators..

87

Re: why...

But you think yourself as greater than God (Nauzubillah) thats why you judge , you decide and you punish. Like you did with your ex wife and now you are having a great time seeing her in pain. Just wait and watch how Allah will deal with you ! (Insha Allah).

To all the ladies don't waste your time with a sick minded crazy person. Allah will deal with him for sure.

88

Re: why...

:D he is such a sad little case. He loves to twist Islam according to his own needs like a typical male chauvinist.

He is actually cracking me up now with his ridiculous posts. Bechara....thinks he is so self-righteous. He is just bitter his ex didn't put up with his bs so he comes on this forum trying to portray that he is a 'man'. I hope his child bride sees his posts so he can pay yet again for another divorce lawyer!! hahaha

89

Re: why...

I have a feeling his ex wife took all his money and his condo in divorce settlement so now he has no choice but to live with his parents.. no wonder he is so bitter.

90

Re: why...

this is what he posted in some other thread !

He himself divorced his wife when she was visiting her family in Pakistan and now he is quoting what Islam says in case of divorce while he himself did not follow it.

doosro ko naseehat khud ko faseehat.

91

Re: why...

Misty you are not even Muslim, then why were you wasting your time arguing with me? Claiming to speak for American Muslim women LOL just cause you know a few??

Whatever your religion or belief system is, you can't tell me about my own religion. I am not debating here if Islam is right or not, LOL.

You dismissed my oath by Allah, because obviously you don't know what that means for a Muslim, you are a kafir. May Allah guide you to Islam.

Have you read the Quran with Tafsir or meaning? I don't think so, don't quote verses you have no knowledge about Ms kafir lady.

There is nothing in Islam that says a person can't marry if they did Zina, they don't ask you that when you do Nikah. A "fornicator" or one committing fahisha means someone who is still committing Zina and doesn't mind it, nor repents for it, GOD says that such people should marry each other.

Islam is all about forgiveness and mercy.

[QUOTE]
But you think yourself as greater than God (Nauzubillah) thats why you judge , you decide and you punish. Like you did with your ex wife and now you are having a great time seeing her in pain. Just wait and watch how Allah will deal with you ! (Insha Allah).
[/QUOTE]

Punish? when did I punish my ex wife? Now you are just using Gods name and making up lies. I gave her full Mehar, and divorced her. I don't owe her anything.

Whatever is happening to her is what her own hands earned, the curse words she dissed out to me, to my parents, the pride she displayed, the money she stole, being rude to both her husbands, its all coming back to her. Justice is being served.

*Infact Allah SWT saved me from her. I thank him every single day, I didn't end up with some mentally unstable used lady.
*
I didn't do anything wrong to her, and who the F are you to judge me ?? Do you know my ex wife or how she behaved or reacted?

92

Re: why...

Oops here comes the kaffir lady again, who is an Aalima by training.

LOL, yeah I am bitter, bitter that I hurt my parents for one single second cause of a used piece of trash like her, yeah that makes me bitter and disgusted with myself.

If my ex wife had access to a condo and money, why would she be running around in Karachi?

She doesn't have a Greencard, she came to U.S on Fiance Visa due to her ex husband, and then he divorced her and never filed her papers.

I did nikah with her, but you have to get a state marriage certificate for things to be legally recognized, didn't get that far.

Since you love to make assumptions about me, lemme make a few about you.

You are bitter cause you have been used a few more times than you would like? Jealous of the pious Muslim girls who guard their modesty and and maintain their respect, and obey their husbands?

Like they say misery loves company!!

Who the heck are you to claim the American culture is better than others. LOL trust me girls are used, abused, and looked down upon as sex objects here. No honor or respect. One guy to the next, teen pregnancy , so many kids don't even know who their father is.

Their value and self esteem comes from how many guys they can get to check them out ---go take that culture and shove it where hundreds of men before your husband have gone before!!!

Do you know there are parties in college, where a willing girl will be in a room and diff guys will then have a go at her one by one, then laugh about it. This is your sick culture !!! Yes I am sure that girls father feels really proud!!!

So many Western women are converting to Islam, alhamdullilah, observing purdah and hijab.

93

Re: why...

keep on barking that's the only thing you know how to do !

94

Re: why...

I had heard about throwing a penny when there are a couple of Jews around and enjoy the ensuing fight..... but this thread takes that to another level.

95

Re: why...

^^^ and keep whining that's all you can do :)

*.Then I saw the (Hell) Fire, and I have never before, seen such a horrible sight as that, and I saw that the majority of its dwellers were women." The people asked, "O Allah's Apostle! What is the reason for that?" He replied, "Because of their ungratefulness." It was said. "Do they disbelieve in Allah (are they ungrateful to Allah)?" He replied, "They are not thankful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors done to them. Even if you do good to one of them all your life, when she seems some harshness from you, she will say, "I have never seen any good from you.' "
Hadith -
*

*Sahih Bukhari 4:464, Narrated 'Abdullah bin Abbas , see also Bukhari 4:464, 7:124 *

Brothers don't listen to Misty TY she is some kafir who is out to "save Pakistani women" alhamdullilah Islam gives a lot of freedom and respect to females.

96

Re: why...

Edal is funny, he can't say all this in front of his wife so he comes here to vent.... Stop arguing with him as u cannot turn him into human now.... It's toooo late ....

97

Re: why...

lmao ...ya somthg lik tht bhind the scene .

98

Re: why...

so lucky to live your life with your wife alone cuz lil bro is home to take care of the parents.. what when he grows older, is about to marry, ofcourse will move out too cuz why not, older bro did too... parents will have aged as well.... i wonder how it will settle then? no one at home .. just the old man and woman. would your heart still be at peace? cuz right now you can say it with full confidence, yay for moving out knowing someone is at home with the folks.

what bout the only son?

i think your thinking will change once you have poured every ounce of energy, mental and physical capacity in raising just one child, from babyhood to manhood the amount of times you will have had to jump hurdles for the sake of your child... its gonna be only normal to expect just THAT much amount of sincerity in return when your child grows up.

99

Re: why...

^I think it's unfair to suggest that he's doing something wrong by moving out. If it makes sense in the present then why not do it; that's not to suggest he and his wife couldn't make changes when needed.

100

Re: Bahu Obligations and the Joint Family System

[mod]

IF ANYONE makes any more comments degrading a gender, a nationality, or a religious group, you will be given points.

If you can't have civil conversation, get out. [/mod]

On a personal note, please keep the idiocy at a minimum.