About those who drink alcohol

Lifestyle Relationships
61

Re: About those who drink alcohol

It's a deal breaker for me. I would not consider a person as a potential match if he drinks, no matter how much or when. And yes it will be for religious reasons AND cultural reasons.

Someone mentioned how and where it is stated in the Quran, here is some information related to that:

When the message of Islam was first delivered, then, alcohol was readily available and frequently consumed. At first, the Muslims were told in the Qur'an that they should not turn up drunk for the Prayers in the mosque:

{O you who believe! Approach not prayers with a mind befogged, until you can understand all that you say} (An-Nisaa' 4:43)

At a later stage, another revelation was received which told them that there was some good to be found in alcohol, as people would tell us today(medical uses), but that this was outweighed by the bad:

{They ask you concerning alcohol and gambling. Say: ‘In them is a great sin, and some benefits for men, but the sin is far greater than the benefits.} (Al-Baqarah 2:219)

Finally, a verse was revealed to the Muslims in Madinah which totally forbade alcohol:

{You who believe! Intoxicants and gambling, (dedication of) stones, and (divination by) arrows, are an abomination of Satan's handiwork. Eschew such abomination, that you may prosper. Satan's plan is (but) to excite enmity and hatred between you, with intoxicants and gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of Allah, and from prayer; will you not then abstain?} (Al-Ma'idah 5:90-91)

62

Re: About those who drink alcohol

It's funny how people always somehow look down upon other people who are citing religious reasons. I mean it makes you just as judgmental as those religious people who judge you for drinking.

And to answer the question, I would never knowingly marry someone who consumes alcohol be it on a regular basis or just social drinking. In my experience guys who drink usually want someone who does drinks.

63

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Whoa. most of us here have roots to which country?.... The Islamic republic of Pakistan. Kinda hard for culture and religion to not be intertwined.

I've grown up in the west my entire life. When I get asked "why don't you eat pork?" I don't answer "eww, it smells bad, it's unhealthy."- which yes, it does... I'm clear and simply say "I'm a Muslim." Rarely am I asked anything beyond that. But the few times that I am asked why Jews and Muslims don't eat pork, I'll explain that it's a filthy animal, etc. My mom told me while growing up that we don't eat pork because of etc etc. and then I would do my own research too.
I have tons of non-Muslim friends who drink and they know I don't because I'm a Muslim. I don't have to say, "I don't like the smell of alcohol" or "Pakistanis will judge me." If anything, it should be easier for me to drink when I'm with only non-Muslims, they won't judge me! But I don't because the religion is present deep down inside me and guides my way of life. I feel like if I gave other reasons, then the religion is going to die off in me. Even my friend that I mentioned in my earlier post who drinks... When Ramadan comes around, he'll tell his other friends he really shouldn't drink because it's Ramadan- and he'll also avoid hooking up... But if he ends up drinking a beer during Ramadan even after debating it- it's because he's weak in that part of his faith.

I'm sure you know the story of the prostitute who fed the hungry dog and was forgiven. Yes, there are Muslims out there who sleep around, do drugs, etc. yet don't drink citing religion.... if they happen to observe something, even one thing such as not drinking, we shouldn't discredit it.

64

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Drinking would be a big no no for me. I don't think I would be OK with my partner drinking, even if "just" socially.

65

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Just because we may commit certain sins it shouldn't mean that other sins should also be allowed. Everyone should try their best in getting the least amount of sins rather than using excuses.

However i do understand what your saying but i guess some people find some sins easier to commit than others but as long as their trying to follow aspects of their religion we shouldn't put them down because they may have a purer heart than we think. So i guess a spouse that does drink whilst is a muslim is difficult to reject or accept because only god knows how good of a person they are.

66

Because they are the easiest for a
Muslim living in a Muslim country to stay away from. When you stay away from gunahe azeem then you are a better Muslim than anyone else, so why not convert pork and alcohol into gunah e azeem. Don’t worry about killing, theft, bribery, milaawat, dhoka, sood and all. All the standards of gunah are created and owned by the Muslims living in Muslim countries. Hum aur aap tou waisay hi aadhay kaafir hain for living in a kaafir mulk.

67

Re: About those who drink alcohol

.

68

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

69

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Sure, there are people who don't eat pork or drink alcohol mostly for cultural reasons. However, if someone says they avoid it for religious reasons, then I'd be inclined to believe that even if they don't practice each and every other thing. If it were purely cultural, then people would (and many do) drink when they're in an environment where it is promoted and where it is the norm and not taboo. For instance, in university, drinking alcohol is heavily promoted. Some people would go with the flow but many others wouldn't, though you would see that they don't practice a lot of the other essentials of deen.

Also, from what I've observed, people will say they're moderate when it comes to deen. Most of these will avoid drinking and pork etc. Then there are some who will try to be particular about certain things, such as praying Eid salats and Juma but don't want to be "too religious". Also some will try to rationalize things that they do, like for free mixing of genders, they'll say stuff like "we're not looking at them with the wrong intention."

[quote]
I'm not saying that people who don't have issues with x,y,z should not care about alcohol/pork. Quite the opposite.** I'm trying to figure out why these same people don't have the same religious intensity when it comes to X,Y,Z?** We judge/shun a person who consumes alcohol or pork so easily and throw out Islam as a reason……yet when someone brings up watching the latest Katrina Kaif movie (along with MANY other behaviors prohibited by Islam), no one mentions how we should not watch/promote that b/c of Islam.
[/quote]

I can't speak for anyone else, but my guess is that one of the factors is consumption of pork and alcohol more clearly being sins (in the perspective of most people) while they don't see watching women and other such behaviour as being as clear cut a matter. Actually based on what I've heard, there are people who don't consider anything short of physical relations as sin, so they wouldn't even think twice about watching a woman on a screen.

70

Re: About those who drink alcohol

I like to think of humans as walking contradictions. There are many things we do on a daily basis that would not be acceptable both culturally and religiously.With that being said, drinking is not allowed in islam.Yes,a lot of people do smoke,but even that is not allowed.It really comes down to what your beliefs are. Not to sugar coat and undermine the teachings of Islam, drinking is not allowed but a lots people around the world(not forgetting Pakistan) do drink.i have actually seen an alcohol store in Lahore.I have grown up in Canada, but honestly I have never in my wildest dreams thought about drinking..I actually hate the smell of it.(yuck)

71

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Quoted to spread the wisdom :)

72

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Salam people,,

There is this Hadih Whosoever of you sees an evil, let him change it with his hand. If he cannot do that, then let him change it with his tongue. If he cannot even do that, then let him do that in his heart and that is the weakest of iman"

I agree with Captain Obvious's post. People firing away with comments like "You have the audacity to judge a drinker, but remain unbothered by other vices like consuming riba, showing your navel and legs, committing zina, not praying and fasting, etc" ....are not aware of their own defensiveness and the fact that they, too, are judging.

If there's a thread on zina, you will find some folks saying that, "Oh don't judge cuz a virgin could be a gossipy, shrine-visiting, closet-voodo practicing wench." It as if some folks lack the courage to simply say that a certain action is haraam in Islam. By saying so, you are only discussing the status of the act in Islam and you are not passing judgment on the individual's character or making predictions about their fate in the next life. Instead some people will resort to downplaying or even deflecting from the issue by pointing to other sins. Why? Sins come in various gravities, but you still cannot dismiss or downplay or justify one sin by enumerating other sins. Maybe those who do this do it due to a guilty conscience or perhaps they are trying to defend loved ones who either once committed the sin or are still engaged in it. You may think such an attitude reflects open-mindedness or a political correctness, but the strongest message it sends is that of deflection and it's regressive. It says something about the state of the Ummah and the direction we're headed in.

If the Quran, ahadith, and majority of scholars are consistent on the status of an action, why do we deflect? If the Prophet SAWS were to admonish a companion to drop a sin, I doubt the latter would deflect from his mistake and point to the flaws of other companions. I imagine that instead he would respond with humility, acknowledge his weakness, and mention making the effort for reform. But these days, the drinkers will get angry and point to you your sins and that of others. And those who don't drink will also deflect and downplay sins. It's as if some have lost the courage to say that an action is a gunnah and just leave it at that. This deflection is really an AHMAKANA attitude in the guise of open-mindedness.

73

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Maybe you should start calling bils 'brother in death' instead of 'brother in law'. You keep dragging it in every other thread, will save you energy.

74

Re: About those who drink alcohol

More than rediculous, some posts seem disturbing.

To the people who are almost bittered with the fact why people are ok with watching half naked women on bollywood or whatever, but not with alcohol and pork. That is probably because those people also compared that with other sins and made it seem ok to do. If you keep repeating something then you will start believing it's true and soon people around you and your offspring will pick it up and it becomes normal.

So don't worry. If you keep downplaying it and comparing it to other, even worse sins, then maybe it will become more acceptable aswell.

75

Re: About those who drink alcohol

I would like to say no. But as a smoker i feel it would be hypocritical of me to tell my spouse she cant have the odd drink

76

Re: About those who drink alcohol

With all due respect, just because you don't agree with someone's beliefs, please don't mock them like that. As far as I see no one here declared someone a kafir just because they drink or don't have any problem with it.

77

With all due respect, just because you don’t agree with someone’s beliefs, please don’t mock them like that. As far as I see no one here declared someone a kafir just because they drink or don’t have any problem with it.
[/quote]

Achcha ji, I won’t mock them like that. I will try to find a different way to mock. Ab tou khush ho jao baji.

78

Re: About those who drink alcohol

Meh..Carry on please.

79

Re: About those who drink alcohol

In the climate of the devalued rupee and the devalued crass societal values our people have, I don't blame some people for taking up drinking

80

Re: About those who drink alcohol

I can consider marrying with someone who is willing to stop drinking gradually but I cannot live with the smoker.because I'm allergic to smoking.