a gud daughter in law....

system · January 13, 2011, 3:19pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

good and DIL?

two words cant go together...sorry

horizon472 · January 13, 2011, 3:44pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

u know y?it is just like gud and MIL the same words cannt go together...lol

system · January 13, 2011, 3:46pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

ya both are evil...

horizon472 · January 13, 2011, 3:47pm

Re: a gud daughter in law…

i luv ur post gina…

horizon472 · January 13, 2011, 3:49pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

thnkGOD u said BOTH...not only bahoo...gud justice..lol

diwana · January 13, 2011, 4:29pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

No.

Independantly by choice. It is theoretical discussion as comparison only.

PakWoman · January 13, 2011, 6:07pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

And how can you prove this theory of yours

diwana · January 14, 2011, 5:43am

Re: a gud daughter in law....

It is not a theory, nor a fantasy.

Please go ask women who are single/divorced or widows.........those who have to live lives without men for one or other reason.

This fantasy of some women showing other women to hate men/inlaws or sell the ludicurous ideas of their deep hatred for men/inlaws for any reason, has not attracted or affected majority of women thank God.

Fooling other women is these so called liberal women's business.

The point here is not to degrade women but to stop these 'freedom warriors' to not fool women and let them be ready to compromise for better future and support and ignore few things in men for a short time and make an effort to make him love. Just think about it.

The liberal kind of women work on this theme:

Hum Tuo Doobay Hain Sanam, Tum Ko Bhi Lay Doobengay

PakWoman · January 14, 2011, 1:28pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

diwana:

It is not a theory, nor a fantasy.

Please go ask women who are single/divorced or widows.........those who have to live lives without men for one or other reason.

This fantasy of some women showing other women to hate men/inlaws or sell the ludicurous ideas of their deep hatred for men/inlaws for any reason, has not attracted or affected majority of women thank God.

Fooling other women is these so called liberal women's business.

The point here is not to degrade women but to stop these 'freedom warriors' to not fool women and let them be ready to compromise for better future and support and ignore few things in men for a short time and make an effort to make him love. Just think about it.

The liberal kind of women work on this theme:

Hum Tuo Doobay Hain Sanam, Tum Ko Bhi Lay Doobengay

This isn't liberal thought, this is the idea that Allah (swt) is sufficient for any Muslim male or female to be happy. A woman could have a thousand husbands and if God wills, she still won't be happy and vice versa. But to say women are dependent on men is absolutely wrong. Maybe the women who are weak may need a support but the same goes for weak men. There are so many women out there single, but still living their life happily. Nothing breaks them, not separation, not divorce - nothing. They are single moms proving they are a thousand fold better and stronger then men. Women like that are all around me. They are my teachers, my neigbours, people I really look up to. Why would any man or woman choose not to marry. It's a natural thing, but to say women are more desperate to get married. In fact I think men are more desperate to get a wife. If my brother has got the same education and upbringing as I, then why can't I be as independent as him.

Stop potraying women as weak, cz they aren't. My tenant's are a newly married couple. The guy has a job but he is dependent on his wife's salary to pay the bills - not to mention for all the meals she cooks for him and also the car she bought with her own money. And there are so many men like him out there.
My teacher is a divorced woman with a kid. I have never seen a happier woman my life. She doesn't tell everyone to get a divorce or how stupid men are but she's living on with her life just the same. She's a beautiful woman and still gets proposals even with that divorce tag but she has chosen to reject them when they don't suit her. She has hobbies, friends, she travels just like any man out there.
The truth is because of the stupid haughty and self-obsessed men in our society - mostly married women seem a lot more unhappier than the unmarried ones.
Yes they are 'Freedom warriors' in the sense that they need to get free from such mentality as yours. Women need men as much as men need women to live a happy life - deal with it.

rizla86 · January 14, 2011, 2:05pm

Re: a gud daughter in law…

pakwoman:

This isn’t liberal thought, this is the idea that Allah (swt) is sufficient for any Muslim male or female to be happy. A woman could have a thousand husbands and if God wills, she still won’t be happy and vice versa. But to say women are dependent on men is absolutely wrong. Maybe the women who are weak may need a support but the same goes for weak men. There are so many women out there single, but still living their life happily. Nothing breaks them, not separation, not divorce - nothing. They are single moms proving they are a thousand fold better and stronger then men. Women like that are all around me. They are my teachers, my neigbours, people I really look up to. Why would any man or woman choose not to marry. It’s a natural thing, but to say women are more desperate to get married. In fact I think men are more desperate to get a wife. If my brother has got the same education and upbringing as I, then why can’t I be as independent as him.

Stop potraying women as weak, cz they aren’t. My tenant’s are a newly married couple. The guy has a job but he is dependent on his wife’s salary to pay the bills - not to mention for all the meals she cooks for him and also the car she bought with her own money. And there are so many men like him out there.
My teacher is a divorced woman with a kid. I have never seen a happier woman my life. She doesn’t tell everyone to get a divorce or how stupid men are but she’s living on with her life just the same. She’s a beautiful woman and still gets proposals even with that divorce tag but she has chosen to reject them when they don’t suit her. She has hobbies, friends, she travels just like any man out there.
The truth is because of the stupid haughty and self-obsessed men in our society - mostly married women seem a lot more unhappier than the unmarried ones.
Yes they are ‘Freedom warriors’ in the sense that they need to get free from such mentality as yours. Women need men as much as men need women to live a happy life - deal with it.

:k: Well said except the part about the teacher. My school administrator was a 40 year old unmarried woman and god knows she took out all that pent up frustration on us. If only she’d gotten married and lost the v-card it would’ve made my school life a lot easier

NomiCA · January 14, 2011, 2:24pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

I am just asking ... unmarried women are happier in our society than married women?

rizla86 · January 14, 2011, 2:33pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

I think unmarried but independent women will at the very least be content with what they have, but I don't see many women looking to spend all their lives remaining single, even if they do well professionally and earn good money. Sooner and later everyone would like to be in a relationship and that goes for both men and women. If a divorced woman lives independently she can still be happy as her kids will give her that motivation and happiness but for someone who's never married, no matter how happy they are...at some point in their lives they will realise there's something missing.

PakWoman · January 14, 2011, 2:36pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

That.

Reha · January 14, 2011, 4:50pm

Re: a gud daughter in law…

diwana:

It is not a theory, nor a fantasy.

Please go ask women who are single/divorced or widows…those who have to live lives without men for one or other reason.

Im divorced…why dont you ask me? I know other divorced girls and some widows…I can give you the answers.

This fantasy of some women showing other women to hate men/inlaws or sell the ludicurous ideas of their deep hatred for men/inlaws for any reason, has not attracted or affected majority of women thank God.

**Aw. You seem to think a woman who lives independently by choice automatically hates men and inlaws? You’re quite an extremist in thought arent you diwana? You have a hard time finding any sort of middle ground or compromise. Majority of women run from men like you which is why they’ve outdone men in education and have the ability to stand on their own two feet. Its scary isnt it? **

**Like someone else said earlier - deal with it. **

Fooling other women is these so called liberal women’s business.

**WOW…so disappointing but predictable. **

The point here is not to degrade women but to stop these ‘freedom warriors’ to not fool women and let them be ready to compromise for better future and support and ignore few things in men for a short time and make an effort to make him love. Just think about it.

**99% of women have been doing that for hundreds of years and will continue to do that. Im so surprised here because you’re stating the obvious and now want the title of a genius? Do you want a wah-wah? Apse pehle jo log guzre hein…unko batana tha na…unko to kuch pata hi nahin tha. Apni nani aur dadi ko bataya? Vo bhi sunke bohot khush hongi ke aap kitni samajdari ki baatein karne lage hein. **

**This is what we’ve been doing forever…the difference now…is that we dont have to do it out of majboori anymore. **

**Thats it. **

The liberal kind of women work on this theme:

Hum Tuo Doobay Hain Sanam, Tum Ko Bhi Lay Doobengay

**^ That is backward thought. You seem to think if a divorced woman talks about independence she is trying to sway other women into divorcing and/or never marrying? Is that how pendu we’re getting now? **

**How about the fact that she is simply sharing her experiences and talking about what is important for a woman to know when she gets married? Sometimes these women have more to offer than you think diwana. Independence means the ability to do as you wish…that is everyone’s basic right. Whether you like it or not…it is what it is. Khwabon ki duniya se bahir niklenge to pata chalega ke the world has changed. You need to keep up with it. **

**Apke gaoon mein kya talaq-shuda aurat achoot hoti hai? Uske ke saat log khana khanay se darte hongey aur kabhi shadiyon mein nahin bulatay hongay…right? How funny. **

pakwoman:

This isn’t liberal thought, this is the idea that Allah (swt) is sufficient for any Muslim male or female to be happy. A woman could have a thousand husbands and if God wills, she still won’t be happy and vice versa. But to say women are dependent on men is absolutely wrong. Maybe the women who are weak may need a support but the same goes for weak men. There are so many women out there single, but still living their life happily. Nothing breaks them, not separation, not divorce - nothing. They are single moms proving they are a thousand fold better and stronger then men. Women like that are all around me. They are my teachers, my neigbours, people I really look up to. Why would any man or woman choose not to marry. It’s a natural thing, but to say women are more desperate to get married. In fact I think men are more desperate to get a wife. If my brother has got the same education and upbringing as I, then why can’t I be as independent as him.

Stop potraying women as weak, cz they aren’t. My tenant’s are a newly married couple. The guy has a job but he is dependent on his wife’s salary to pay the bills - not to mention for all the meals she cooks for him and also the car she bought with her own money. And there are so many men like him out there.
My teacher is a divorced woman with a kid. I have never seen a happier woman my life. She doesn’t tell everyone to get a divorce or how stupid men are but she’s living on with her life just the same. She’s a beautiful woman and still gets proposals even with that divorce tag but she has chosen to reject them when they don’t suit her. She has hobbies, friends, she travels just like any man out there.
The truth is because of the stupid haughty and self-obsessed men in our society - mostly married women seem a lot more unhappier than the unmarried ones.
Yes they are ‘Freedom warriors’ in the sense that they need to get free from such mentality as yours. Women need men as much as men need women to live a happy life - deal with it.

:k:

Another extreme. Who said that? Im just asking as well.

Women who have been through bad marriages are much happier single most of the time.

Gina · January 14, 2011, 5:15pm

Re: a gud daughter in law…

diwana:

It is not a theory, nor a fantasy.

Please go ask women who are single/divorced or widows…those who have to live lives without men for one or other reason.

This fantasy of some women showing other women to hate men/inlaws or sell the ludicurous ideas of their deep hatred for men/inlaws for any reason, has not attracted or affected majority of women thank God.

Fooling other women is these so called liberal women’s business.

The point here is not to degrade women but to stop these ‘freedom warriors’ to not fool women and let them be ready to compromise for better future and support and ignore few things in men for a short time and make an effort to make him love. Just think about it.

The liberal kind of women work on this theme:

Hum Tuo Doobay Hain Sanam, Tum Ko Bhi Lay Doobengay

I read this post a few times, didn’t get any of it. I tried though! But.. all I can say is that you really kept an apt nick

Here’s one for you:

Khud toh diwana hon, aap sab ko bhi apni ‘intelligence or wit’ se kardon ga

NomiCA · January 14, 2011, 5:34pm

Re: a gud daughter in law....

I was just clarifying what pakwoman said.....

obviously any woman would be happier than a woman in a bad marriage....
i thought she was thinking that a single woman is happier than a married woman........which kinda sounded weird....because there could be a single woman in a worse situation too..

diwana · January 15, 2011, 3:11am

Re: a gud daughter in law…

pakwoman:

This isn’t liberal thought, this is the idea that Allah (swt) is sufficient for any Muslim male or female to be happy.

**And Allah SWT said he made his creation in pair.

It is so saddening that the liberal kind of women try to prove mujarrad (single life) is not such a problem.

Remind you, I never said men should live or can live happily without women.

In every post I said comparatively speaking men do not need women as much as women need men.

Prove me wrong please.
**
A woman could have a thousand husbands and if God wills,
**
Your own made up idea. God did not even approve more than one, so why even try to think God’s will ever be thousand husbands for a woman? How did you even come up with this idea?

Whatever God’s will is has been sent by now. So why try to add/speculate something new to his will? Hain ji?
**
she still won’t be happy and vice versa. But to say women are dependent on men is absolutely wrong.

**For the last time please let me clear and read it a 100 time.

Both men and women need each other. No doubt or argument there.

But women need men MORE in this world than men need women.

Living in fantasy is not a virtue. Realistically speaking, a single woman will still need a male person every once in a while to go through the harsh realities of life.

Not a man. Since man by virtue of being man can handle many issues better than a woman.

Do I need to repeat that my friend?

**Maybe the women who are weak may need a support but the same goes for weak men.
**
Define weakness.

**
There are so many women out there single, but still living their life happily. Nothing breaks them, not separation, not divorce - nothing.

**Are you basing their happiness on not dealing with separation, divorce or beak ups?

Really? That is a very narrow spectrum.

This also assumes EVERY MARRIED/ATTACHED woman is unhappy since she has to deal with these issues. (Oh you said that below..I thought you would not mean that. LOL)

Living life in this world certainly has these issues but that is just the tip of an iceberg.

There are so many daily issues which a man or woman goes through and there comes a point where if she is with a man those issues get resolved in her favor.

I am surprise that so many pages have passed and the fantasy of women living single and safe/happy is still strong. Love it!

**
They are single moms proving they are a thousand fold better and stronger then men.
**
No ma’am. Not true. You are making it up just to try to prove your point.

I know you are. It is called “Angoor Khattay Hain”.

**
Women like that are all around me. They are my teachers, my neigbours, people I really look up to. Why would any man or woman choose not to marry. It’s a natural thing, but to say women are more desperate to get married. In fact I think men are more desperate to get a wife. If my brother has got the same education and upbringing as I, then why can’t I be as independent as him.

**Eduction is not the standard here.

Emotionally and physically most women are dependent on men and nothing WRONG in admitting it**. **Only so called ‘freedom fighter women’ believe against it.

Majority of women, is just happy to admit it and not ashamed of having men around for their various needs.
**
Men do have their own weaknesses and needs. Sure. Nothing wrong in admitting that.

Stop potraying women as weak, cz they aren’t. My tenant’s are a newly married couple. The guy has a job but he is dependent on his wife’s salary to pay the bills - not to mention for all the meals she cooks for him and also the car she bought with her own money. And there are so many men like him out there.

**You want me to lie?

OK. Women are stronger than men in all respect. They do not need men. Men need women more. How does that sound? Happy?

The example you gave is not something to make it a generalized this still falls under what I said.

Women need men more.

So with your example, you are aware the vast majority of men are the one who are bread winner or earn more than women. (And still vast majority of women have no problem with that)

So now, do you agree considering your own example, women need men more?

Your answer then would be yes!

Isn’t it what I said?

**My teacher is a divorced woman with a kid. I have never seen a happier woman my life. She doesn’t tell everyone to get a divorce or how stupid men are but she’s living on with her life just the same. She’s a beautiful woman and still gets proposals even with that divorce tag but she has chosen to reject them when they don’t suit her. She has hobbies, friends, she travels just like any man out there.

**Trust me. Neither a normal man nor a normal woman can be the happiest person as a single entity.

She would not come to you all crying about being single, would she?

**The truth is because of the stupid haughty and self-obsessed men in our society - mostly married women seem a lot more unhappier than the unmarried ones.

**Now I heard it all.

This statement needs to be framed to show how unreal these so called freedom fighters, liberal women could be.

Come on.

These sick ideas assumes so many false beliefs and generalization.

1- Men in our society. lol
2- Are Self obsessed and haughty. lol
3- Because of that mostly married women are unhappier than unmarried women. LOL

**Yes they are ‘Freedom warriors’ in the sense that they need to get free from such mentality as yours. Women need men as much as men need women to live a happy life - deal with it.

**I already proved my point using your own example didn’t I?

I do not have to ‘deal with it’. Hurts women themselves unfortunately on the long run believing in fantasy or trying to pollute other women minds.

**

.

rizla86 · January 15, 2011, 3:27am

Re: a gud daughter in law…

You have a point there :k:. Hence the concept of mahram (e.g. mahram is supposed to accompany you on pilgrimage).

diwana · January 15, 2011, 3:29am

Re: a gud daughter in law…

Shukriyah. Nawazish!

It is not my fault if you did not understand anything there. Thank you for admitting that though.

diwana · January 15, 2011, 4:03am

Re: a gud daughter in law....

A simple advice to everyone: *Try not to get personal when cornered in to a discussion or an argument. Say something useful in you support and have a good time.
*
OK. That's that. Now,

Even very educated women from open societies do realize this fact that they need to go back to basics of being happy to get married, live at home, have men around and nurture family with the help of a man. They ARE not ashamed of that.

Some women who love to follow other societies actually are way behind in this. There was an era from 60's to 90's or early 2000 when women lib movement was at it's peak.

Result? Nothing.

Why nothing? That gave women actually more problems to deal with.

Their basic instinct (a good movie lol) did not change. They stll had to take care of chlidren, cook, deal with the domestic issues and in order to speed up with the demands of this liberation idea had to work outside and deal with outside issues.

That is called 'double whammy'.

So.......they now go back to basics and women are now rejecting these ideas.

However, some blind followers are still there, as the remnant of that false movement.