so all BAHOOS(daughter in law)…i was wondering dat wat u think abut the topic as i was discussing wid my frnd.we were talking dat wat is the definition of a gud bahoo wid her inlaws(in joint system) n nowadys wen a daughter in law is so obiedient n gud so whether she gets its reward in return or no use to b like a gud1…my frnd was saying dat inlaws r inlaws atlast n even wen we sacrifice our emotions our energies wen there ll b minor mistake they ll 4get ur all gud acts n only consider u a bad1.so there should nt b need to present urself extra extra gud ,nice ect like our typical bahoor show to their inlaws.especially wen u live wid them in joint then obviously ur mistakes ur weaknesses ll b there n u r non perfect in the end.the only bahoo is gud who lives seprate n no khidmat,no mistakes,kabhi kabhi kamilna n she is always gud…ur honest opinins plzzz???
Re: a gud daughter in law....
a GOONGI bahoo is the bestest daughter-in-law! period!!!:)
Re: a gud daughter in law....
at this forum there is no MIL...... all are DILs themselves.....so the answers will have a 'bias'....
Re: a gud daughter in law....
Keep your mouth shut - eyes and ears open.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
or alternatively keep your eyes wide shut.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
she has a point.
Re: a gud daughter in law…
Re: a gud daughter in law....
A good DIL is one who understands that her parents in law should be treated like her own parents when it comes to respect and when it comes to expecting from them she should not expect the same way she would expect from her parents. that should pretty much do it =p
Re: a gud daughter in law....
A good DIL is one who understands that her parents in law should be treated like her own parents when it comes to respect and when it comes to expecting from them she should not expect the same way she would expect from her parents. that should pretty much do it =p
this is very true bt also unfair :(
Re: a gud daughter in law....
You should never expect anything from inlaws...not because they're bad people but because they're not your parents. You cannot expect them to forgive you, forget mistakes or even so much as give you gold or presents.
I know it probably will sound bad but realistically speaking...wouldnt it be so much better if we just kept our expectations to our parents, best friends, husband, etc? Why do we expect things from them?
Re: a gud daughter in law....
You should never expect anything from inlaws...not because they're bad people but because they're not your parents. You cannot expect them to forgive you, forget mistakes or even so much as give you gold or presents.
I know it probably will sound bad but realistically speaking...wouldnt it be so much better if we just kept our expectations to our parents, best friends, husband, etc? Why do we expect things from them?
Appi, you always write things that make me think, in a good way though :)
Re: a gud daughter in law....
The one who respects and treats in laws like her own family.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
exchange ur issues with ur hubby instead in-laws
he should do same respect with ur parents so u will do for his & u will not be sad that u did alot! cuz u know ur hubby feels all efforts
just dont make expection from in-laws & surly hubby shouldnt expect anything from ur parents even if his family will talk or not!
marriage is all abt fair but if u cant make all ppl fair to u but u should be fair in regard of familes through husband!
there is no law that only a girl should be nice or cuz in pakistan culture somethings written hiddenly u should follow blind!
im same as my hubby in marriage life for respect-expections of parents or such issues....
i dont have to live with in-laws as my hubby doesnt have to do...i dont have to expect any gifts from my in-laws as my hubby shoulnt expect from my parents...
but life all isnt abt laws....
sometimes we should be forgiving even But not like a Mazloom that watever happen to us we would say a blind yes
its not so hard to make a balance relation with in-laws & ur own parents
but we have a proverb ""more far,more love""
try to avoid situation to mix 24 hours with in-laws cuz u r not an angel nor them....cuz u r a young & they r middle aged with diffrent needs so to avoid these problem make a respected ditance...
cuz once u do mistake they will not forgive u easily nor if they will fight u will forget them as if ur mom did with u!
living with anyone even ur own parents has same problems but own parents has blood relation that stops all bad feelings & let u forgive & forget which will not happen in a join family!
all groom doesnt have pro with in-laws doesnt mean all r soooooooooo nice son-in laws but cuz they never had to live 24 hours with them ...
so according a hidden law its bad for a boy to live with in-laws & its like a 90% force for a girl to live with in-laws
so always DIL r evil...SIN r angel!
Re: a gud daughter in law....
You should never expect anything from inlaws...not because they're bad people but because they're not your parents. You cannot expect them to forgive you, forget mistakes or even so much as give you gold or presents.
I know it probably will sound bad but realistically speaking...wouldnt it be so much better if we just kept our expectations to our parents, best friends, husband, etc? Why do we expect things from them?
u r rite reha but we do hv expectations bcuz we do gud acts,gud behaviour,we sacrifice out tym,we neglect ourself.then i'm not sayng dat a daughter inlaw should hv xtra expectations,,i'm saying dat y they cannt count all gud deeds only?wen there is minor problem y they forget all n bahoo is the worst..inlaws start thinking negativly..i believe dat APna app marna dosaroon k liye is nothing n nothing...no use,no reward,just take ur rite,live as u luv n dats all.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
u r rite reha but we do hv expectations bcuz we do gud acts,gud behaviour,we sacrifice out tym,we neglect ourself.then i'm not sayng dat a daughter inlaw should hv xtra expectations,,i'm saying dat y they cannt count all gud deeds only?wen there is minor problem y they forget all n bahoo is the worst..inlaws start thinking negativly..i believe dat APna app marna dosaroon k liye is nothing n nothing...no use,no reward,just take ur rite,live as u luv n dats all.
Im not saying be mean. I am not saying fight with them. I am not saying anything negative at all.
Dont expect them to act like your parents because the only that can act like your parent...is your actual parent. The less expectations you have from inlaws, the better off you will be. No fights, no hurt feelings because you shouldnt care whether they give you things or expect them to forgive you for transgressions like your mother would. Its unrealistic.
I personally think its wise to do your best with them but expect nothing in return.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
i think if the bahu doesn't interfere in every matter of their in-laws then she can live a peaceful life. she should respect them if they are nice to her. the respect should be the same like she gives it to her mom/dad or anyone of that age. dil should consider her in-laws as her anty and uncle but not mom and dad.
Re: a gud daughter in law....
Given that we only get unhappy DILs posting in this forum the opinion is heavily skewed against in-laws. If your friend was saying 'in-laws are in-laws', she is making a generalisation based on the fact that it is only those who have bad in-laws that complain to others. Those who have a good relationship with in-laws have no dirty laundry to air in public so it appears as though the only kind of in-laws that exist are bad.
Re: a gud daughter in law…
welcome to the club bro..
here is what i said if , you missed…
Re: a gud daughter in law....
... be a super woman! Cos my son is a super man!
Re: a gud daughter in law....
A good daughter in law is the one who does not think she is in-law...