Re: A better wife?
if a husband cheats on his wife, the wife must leave him immediately because he deserves a street prostitute [not even an escort!] and NOT a wife...for sure!
Re: A better wife?
In my book, their are two non-negotiables.
1) Infidelity (of ANY kind...be it a one night stand or long, torrid love affair)
2) Domestic Violence (physical and emotional)
The buck stops there. Finished. Finito. Bus. Khalas. I have too much self respect to subject myself or my children to either of those scenarios. Life is too short and I REFUSE to spend my days or share my life with someone who does not want to love me.
Re: A better wife?
pshhht…why you people no answer correctly…
let me make it easier…and say it… :halo:
**
Yes…she is a better wife who stays and sticks to a bad marriage…and the women who walks away without trying…is a bad wife
**
Re: A better wife?
Depending on the issue, I would definitely take some time to calm down and make a rational decision.
That said, the majority of divorces are initiated by women and most of them are not in abusive marriages. In those cases, I would suggest working on the emotional issues instead of just filing for divorce, but hey, our generation (men and women) are not known for being patient.
Re: A better wife?
infidelity is infidelity. one-night stand, long-affair, blah blahh blah. all the same. not acceptable.
and i agree with Altair. Altair for president:hula:
Re: A better wife?
Well realistically speaking, cheating and all that negative stuff shouldn't be there if you really love your spouse. <<Xtron's word of wisdom. If spouse cheats then every couple have different way to work this marriage out. Coz divorce should be last resort to everything.
Re: A better wife?
In my book, their are two non-negotiables.
1) Infidelity (of ANY kind...be it a one night stand or long, torrid love affair)
2) Domestic Violence (physical and emotional)
The buck stops there. Finished. Finito. Bus. Khalas. I have too much self respect to subject myself or my children to either of those scenarios. Life is too short and I REFUSE to spend my days or share my life with someone who does not want to love me.
So you would rather have your children shuttle around to weekends to dad, assuming you get the kids? I am not talking about the morality or your feelings here, but just a straightforward question if you have a family.
Re: A better wife?
So you would rather have your children shuttle around to weekends to dad, assuming you get the kids? I am not talking about the morality or your feelings here, but just a straightforward question if you have a family.
Yes, if I were cheated on or beat by husband, I would most definately end my marriage. Especially for the sake of childrens safety and well being.
My own parents divorced when I was 15, after 3 seperations, and repeated tries to "make it work", so I do have some frame of reference. Thank god there was no infidelity or domestic violence in my parents case..but still, the best thing they ever did for us was divorcing. I know what it's like to grow up in a home where parents are unhappy with eachother and always at odds, and it was far better for us to go back and forth between ammi & papa than it was to live in a miserable, tension filled home.
I most definitely am not an advocate of divorce, and I let my husband know from day one, that no matter how bad things get, I don't want to hear the "D" word from his mouth ever EXCEPT in the two scenarios I have already mentioned. However, I will say that divorce does not always have to be the negative, end all death sentence that our culture makes it out to be.
Everyones situations and families are different, and decisions should be made based on that.
Re: A better wife?
Depending on the issue, I would definitely take some time to calm down and make a rational decision. ** That said, the majority of divorces are initiated by women and most of them are not in abusive marriages.** In those cases, I would suggest working on the emotional issues instead of just filing for divorce, but hey, our generation (men and women) are not known for being patient.
Isn't that usually because of cheating? I'm not sure, just what I assumed..
Re: A better wife?
So you would rather have your children shuttle around to weekends to dad, assuming you get the kids? I am not talking about the morality or your feelings here, but just a straightforward question if you have a family.
Serious question--does a man who beats his wife deserve to see his kids?
Re: A better wife?
Depending on the issue, I would definitely take some time to calm down and make a rational decision.
That said, the majority of divorces are initiated by women and most of them are not in abusive marriages. In those cases, I would suggest working on the emotional issues instead of just filing for divorce, but hey, our generation (men and women) are not known for being patient.
what an odd blanket statement. How many divorces have you seen? and how do you know exactly what went on behind the scenes that the wives filed for divorce just for "emotional" issues?
Re: A better wife?
Its not fair to say *majority of divorces initiated by women , *what we can say instead is they are expected to work harder then men in the relationship to save shadi . khair thats alag masla ..
A person who beats her wife shouldent be allowed to come near his kids.. If you dont like her just leave her tats it beating her up shows he is weakness .
Re: A better wife?
Serious question--does a man who beats his wife deserve to see his kids?
Are we talking regular beating or once in a moon or like that one time when he hit her as he was out of control? I think my answer would depend upon that.
[quote]
Its not fair to say *majority of divorces initiated by women
[/quote]
*Actually, a desi kurri told me that she can see the reasoning behind why women didn't automatically get the right of divorce in islam, though you can add it like they do even in pakistan now in the marriage contact. I think the reasoning is that women are more emotional generally compared to men.
Re: A better wife?
Divorce and domestic violence(abuse) are two complicated interrelated issues .
Paenting is a completely different matter which gets deeply affected by both of the issues mentioned.
QUESTION WAS dOES hUSBAND AND FATHER WHO BEATS HIS WIFE HAS A RIGHT TO MEET HIS KIDS?
Question is whether the husband and wife are seperated?
Is there any seperation agreement?
is there any court order?
is there conditions by court if husband is being charged under domestic abuse ?
Acording to islamic law
both parents have equal right to raise kids and make the decisions for their lives.
any further questions?
?
Re: A better wife?
Are we talking regular beating or once in a moon or like that one time when he hit her as he was out of control? I think my answer would depend upon that.
I'm talking about constant/regular beatings.
Re: A better wife?
beating is abuse no matter if it's once or on constant basis.Abuse is a cycle which begins with emotional torture and physical abuse.
Islam or civilized society both prohibit abuse in any form.
Re: A better wife?
both men and women has equal rights to get divorce if circumstances are not right for them to stay in peace n harmony in that relationship
Re: A better wife?
Altair after that take in the rear end comment I am gonna be a prick :D "Would you stay with your wife if she cheated on you? Would you look at the circumstances then and see if you were to blame?" :D Yes you totally deserve this :p
Re: A better wife?
....
A woman's worst enemy is another woman.
Ummm.. That sounds like me. :D
Re: A better wife?
She is neither bad nor good. Period.