Share it here!
Everyone in this section talks about the process of the shaadi, but what about the process of how you got engaged!?
Everyones got a story! Share it 
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
Mine is pretty boring. I don't think anyone would like to hear it. :)
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
^I would.
We were friends at uni then best friends... I always had a crush on him but being a woman I never told him and he was too shy I reckon to tell me how he felt.
He proposed to me while we were on a holiday somewhere in the Indian Ocean (scandalous yes I know if this was in the life and relationship section the mulla's would be eating me alive)
So we got engaged. I always knew our families would like each other. I always kept my parents likes and dislikes in my head.
Our families met and now we are organizing our wedding for next year =)
I properly interacted with guys for the first time when I went to college and I can tell you I was so disappointed. Smoking, drinking, drugs, sleeping around were all normal activities for guys bought up here (I'm from London).
When I met my fiancee for the first time I was so impressed that he had a huge social circle of muslim and non muslim friends but he was very attached to his morals. Not necessarily because certain things are forbidden in Islam but more because he did personally want to be involved in certain things. (also he was so damn cute! haha =)
So for me the attraction was there from day one but it developed over time as I noticed how caring he was for his family and friends.... oh and me!
Once our feelings were out in the open he didn't take long to come and ask my dad for his permission to marry me and make everything legit nor did he ever pressurize me into doing something I didn't want to do.
We are both muslim but our families are not from the same country so at the moment we are learning each others language!
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
^What country was he from?
I'll tell you the short version, if I can...
He's from pakistan, I'm from scotland, we used to visit Pakistan a lot. I used to totally love him as a friend when we were younger (I used to cry whenever he left to go home) and once we grew up, in our teenage years he told me he loved me, a few of the other guys I knew here said the same thing to me but I laughed them off, I did the same with him. I grew up with guys, I didn't really know any girls, in Pak or here. And I kind of stopped talking to all of them because it felt so awkward afterwards. (I only have girlfriends now lol)
A few years ago he got his parents to ask me officially and I refused. So his parents started looking for someone else for him but he kept refusing, he spent 3 years doing that and when I went to Pakistan a few months ago he told me he still liked me and he's still waiting for me. So I let my mum and dad know I might be interested, but I would like to make my decision when I return to the UK.
When I came back I did istakhara and then said yes. My parents really like him, and I think I may too, because he's really sweet, and respects all his elders and me too. Plus- what kind of idiot waits 3 years for someone? lol.
My dad's a very hard person to impress, especially when it comes to me (I'm the only daughter), so if my dad's happy, I am too. We're not going to get married any time soon, so it'll be a long engagement.
^ yay that's cute =)
So how old are you now?
I'm from Pakistan and my partners family is from Bangladesh..
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
how do u people get away with long engagements ?
mine's almost 2 years, and my inlaws are always like "bohut der ho gaee hai, itna intezar koi nahi kerta, itna time ho gaya hai" and blah blah !!!
:(
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
I'm 20, so he asked me when I was 17. lol
That's so cool, you know I've heard about a lot of people in Pakistan don't like to be married into Bangladesh families...although I don't really understand why. The distance and culture change doesn't seem to matter to them as much when it comes to getting their kids married here or the states.
Sara, I've already started getting that, and I just got engaged in February! My to be inlaws aren't complaining, but other randomers are. I tell them it's none of their business (heheh my mum gets mad at me for that, but do you blame me? Every single day!). My fiance knows I still have a lot of things I want to do in life, no way am I getting married before finishing uni.
how do u people get away with long engagements ? mine's almost 2 years, and my inlaws are always like "bohut der ho gaee hai, itna intezar koi nahi kerta, itna time ho gaya hai" and blah blah !!!
:(
How come u want to wait?
Mine is pretty boring. I don't think anyone would like to hear it. :)
Tell!
I'm 20, so he asked me when I was 17. lol That's so cool, you know I've heard about a lot of people in Pakistan don't like to be married into Bangladesh families...although I don't really understand why. The distance and culture change doesn't seem to matter to them as much when it comes to getting their kids married here or the states.
Sara, I've already started getting that, and I just got engaged in February! My to be inlaws aren't complaining, but other randomers are. I tell them it's none of their business (heheh my mum gets mad at me for that, but do you blame me? Every single day!). My fiance knows I still have a lot of things I want to do in life, no way am I getting married before finishing uni.
Ur fiance is Masha Allah supporting you in your decision of marrying late.. thats really so sweet of him... May Allah keeps u happy and blessed... sometimes what we do not like in our lives is the BEST for us by Allah...
Mine is pretty boring. I don't think anyone would like to hear it. :)
would love to hear yours tooo :)
I'm 20, so he asked me when I was 17. lol That's so cool, you know I've heard about a lot of people in Pakistan don't like to be married into Bangladesh families...although I don't really understand why. The distance and culture change doesn't seem to matter to them as much when it comes to getting their kids married here or the states.
Sara, I've already started getting that, and I just got engaged in February! My to be inlaws aren't complaining, but other randomers are. I tell them it's none of their business (heheh my mum gets mad at me for that, but do you blame me? Every single day!). My fiance knows I still have a lot of things I want to do in life, no way am I getting married before finishing uni.
exactly, its not that his immediate family complains or something, its that his cousin's SIL said something a few times, or my SIL's MIL mentions this all the time...... arghhhh !!!
people who have nothing to do with our wedding....
How come u want to wait?
lolx :D
we want to settle down in our lives before we get married :)
besides, i havnt even finished college :(
Re: Your Shaadi Story.
:k:stories
lolx :D we want to settle down in our lives before we get married :) besides, i havnt even finished college :(
ohhh, yeah thats an obvious reason. Smart! Dont let anyone rush you :)
I'm 20, so he asked me when I was 17. lol That's so cool, you know I've heard about a lot of people in Pakistan don't like to be married into Bangladesh families...although I don't really understand why. The distance and culture change doesn't seem to matter to them as much when it comes to getting their kids married here or the states.
Sara, I've already started getting that, and I just got engaged in February! My to be inlaws aren't complaining, but other randomers are. I tell them it's none of their business (heheh my mum gets mad at me for that, but do you blame me? Every single day!). My fiance knows I still have a lot of things I want to do in life, no way am I getting married before finishing uni.
Its because all they eat is fish! No that's a lame joke its because bengali families are usually very close knit and strict and well us pakis have modernised quite a bit now!
Its ok for me the fiancee has just bought his own place and because were like friends w are both open to flaws in each others families and openly discuss them. We don't have the sort of relationship where he will throw a tantrum at me over his mum or something like a lot do!
But what I can say is that the darn language is very different sigh
Its because all they eat is fish! No that's a lame joke its because bengali families are usually very close knit and strict and well us pakis have modernised quite a bit now!
Its ok for me the fiancee has just bought his own place and because were like friends w are both open to flaws in each others families and openly discuss them. We don't have the sort of relationship where he will throw a tantrum at me over his mum or something like a lot do!
But what I can say is that the darn language is very different sigh
Lol, my Urdu is quite bad, he laughs at me all the time. But I can guess how annoying it is to learn a language that way. Does that mean you'll be moving to bangladesh?
Heheh, i like fish, should visit...
That's so nice, it's better when you're like friends rather than fiance and fiancee, chatting and understanding one another like pals is WAY better than the whole lovey dovey banter people like to do. I know a lot of engagements that ended that way, even after a whole year of being engaged!
exactly, its not that his immediate family complains or something, its that his cousin's SIL said something a few times, or my SIL's MIL mentions this all the time...... arghhhh !!! people who have nothing to do with our wedding....
Lol, I don't understand why they make it their business. All my mami's and my mum's friends make such a big deal. And I agree, it's better to get your life sorted out before you get married, there's too many other things to deal with when you're married, how are you meant to handle uni/college too?
Why don't you share your story? =D
@ ashy: I know, alhamdullilah I'm so lucky to have someone so patient and understanding as him.
I am not engaged or married yet but going through the process of dulha selection ;) but I can say that we shud select the person who is willing to accept us with an open heart and NOT those whom we would like to spend our life with.
As they say, shadi us se kerni chahiyay jo ap se pyar karay... us se nahi kerni chahiyay jis ko ap pyar karain... well if its two way... thats the best ;)