so I grew up in Pakistan calling everyone uncle and auntie!
With cuppycake, if I introdue him to someone desi.. I say either khala first name, khalu first name etc, with arabs, it’s usually sister first name, Brother first name, etc… and then lately now when he visits me at work, I will tell him to say hello to Mr. first name or Miss first name.. I dont want him to grow up calling his elders with their first name only! Is this appropriate or shall I use their last names? I am on first name basis with them of course so it may look strange if I call them with their last names for cuppycake.. how do you deal with it? How do you introduce non desis to your children?
by their first names. rishtas work differently here- our desi friends are all khala this and chacha that but the goras find it odd if i say aunt or uncle because for them, that means a family relation, and mr. this and ms. that is too formal.
with non desis.. i say aunty blah blah or uncle blah blah.. IF i am close to them. otherwise.. its the first name only. there is really nothing else i can put infront cuz not everyone wants to be called MR or MRS.. they find it quite stupid really.. they dont even want their students calling them mr or mrs..
thankfully midget is a bright kid and knows who is desi and who isnt.. who is a aunty, khala, phupo, nani , dadi, his only worry initially was.. kitni saari daadi-iya hain?! yeh bhi daadi hain?! it got him SO confused that when we would say we are gonna go over to dadi amma’s today.. he ALWAYS had to (and still does) confirm *aariz wali daadi ke paas ya koi aur dadi ke paas? *
haha.. hillarious.
oh and now i feel a bit iffy introducing even desis as khalas or phupos.. the older women dont mind but a girl told me off for saying khala.. she goes.. kiu.. mein phupo nahi hosakthi? so i said ok u can be phupo.. and she goes.. no thank you.. i have enough blood nephews .. i dont need a fake one. im only insert name to midget.
i was gobsmacked! i just answered back.. chalo.. mein tho aapko izzat derahi thi..ab tumhe raaz nahi ayi tho .. its ok :halo:
i would just intro them as mr or mrs if you KNWO they wont mind being called that.. and first name plz. if they mind it.. they will let u know
I hate being called an Uncle by random kids, I'm not your uncle kiddo and I take offence to you calling me that. And I don't call people uncle or aunt, unless I really have to, the words make me cringe. I'm fine with calling my relatives Khala, Phuppo etc and ______ Sahab for everyone else.
oh and now i feel a bit iffy introducing even desis as khalas or phupos.. the older women dont mind but a girl told me off for saying khala.. she goes.. kiu.. mein phupo nahi hosakthi? so i said ok u can be phupo.. and she goes.. no thank you.. i have enough blood nephews .. i dont need a fake one. im only insert name to midget.
Wow that's so rude!!!!!
I dont' think I care what kids call me, "phupho" is reserved for my nephews only...cz i only have one brother...... khala/aunty/baji/first name, desn't bother me.
oh and now i feel a bit iffy introducing even desis as khalas or phupos.. the older women dont mind but a girl told me off for saying khala.. she goes.. kiu.. mein phupo nahi hosakthi? so i said ok u can be phupo.. and she goes.. no thank you.. i have enough blood nephews .. i dont need a fake one. im only insert name to midget.
You should've said "OK aunty it is."
Gia, we always introduce non-desis by their first name. Mr./Mrs. last name would be too formal.
Khawa...do lagani thi..I always thought it was a honor to be a khala n such..hunh..good thing she isn't your friend anymore :D
I think we may stick to mr n ms first name..I will definitely ask them though, if they mind we will use the first name or whatever they prefer...I was just wondering how rest of you do it!
Desis will still be uncle auntie khala khalu etc...that's just how it is!! :D
Khawa, that was rude from the girl, but your comeback was good too hehe ..
I dont care what kids call me. They can call me khala, phupho, aunty or just my name. Whatever they are comfy with. Plus I dont have the "ticks" about only my nephews being the once who can call me phupho, because they dont lol. In my family we call all our khala, mamies and phupho for "aunty" .. I've gotten to know its not so normal as I thought it is. Friends of mine are shocked when they hear it .. I honestly find it weird to be shocked about it.. I dont see anything weird or disrespecting or cutting of blood ties with "aunty"
Gore actually dont mind being called their names here. thats atleast how it is
Ps. sidenote, I'm the baji of the family .. you've no idea how hard it is to call someone else baji for me lol
lol i don't think I have a "tick" for only my nephews calling me phupho... I guess its never really come up.... not like I"d do what khawateen's friend did if some kid calls me a phupo.
If it's someone I am friendly with and who is roughly my generation, I have her say "Aunt" or "Uncle" to the non-desis and "Khala/Mamoon" to the desis. If it's a non-desi who is much older than I am, I would have her say Mr/Mrs.
Not to spoil or derail the OP's thread,but I'd like to ask something related.
Growing up in Pakistan,every kid older than us was introduced to us as 'baji' or 'bhai.During my trips to Pakistan with my toddler,she was introduced to her cousins etc as 'Baji A' or 'Bhai A'.Worked perfectly.
Now she has the habit of calling every kid (ranging in age and size from few months to maybe 10 years..!),'baby'.And we have had some unpleasant scenes at the playgrounds or library when the 5-6 year old kid just says "I am not a baby,you are'.It once got to the extreme that mine started to cry when the almost 5-6 year old boy almost shouted at her and told her 'you are a stupid baby'.
How do I tell her what to call them?I can't just go ahead and ask their names,because most of them wont talk to strangers (which is a good thing.!),and I just do not feel ok telling her 'oh here go play ball with your sister or brother' etc etc.
I just want her to stop calling every kid a 'baby'.
his only worry initially was.. kitni saari daadi-iya hain?! yeh bhi daadi hain?! it got him SO confused that when we would say we are gonna go over to dadi amma’s today.. he ALWAYS had to (and still does) confirm *aariz wali daadi ke paas ya koi aur dadi ke paas? *
