How often you guys get to listen to this line? I often get to hear this from my relatives and siblings in Pakistan, I feel really hurt each time. How do/would you feel?
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Well you cannot remain as good looking as you were when you were a toddler forever, can you?
I don't hear this line, but even if I did, it wouldn't bother me anyway.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Zuban-e-Halq ko nakarrah khuda samjho, why dont you just accept it as nothing losts for ever.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
You just say to them...."you used to be not good looking.......and you haven't changed a bit""
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Zuban-e-Halq ko nakarrah khuda samjho, why dont you just accept it as nothing losts for ever.
what does nakarah mean?
i don't think anyone can accept that they're not good looking anymore unless they have a very low self esteem.
the line is more of a reflection of my loved ones' mind, they have always tried to put me down in one way or other.
Re: “You used to be so pretty”
I have not come across this here, It seems to be a speciality of women in pakistan in general. When I go to pakistan I always get " kya hogaya hai tumhe, itni kamzor lag rahi ho, complexion bhi fresh nahin hai". 
Firstly, I have not put on any weight since marriage, unlike my contemporaries in pakistan who after marriage start looking like moti dhobans (lets face it most just laze around ordering their maids to bring them glass of water!) while we in the west have to do everything, so no time for those weekly facials either for that ’ fresh look’. 
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
If you are not fazed by someone's comments, then I don't think that is low self-esteem, but high self esteem.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
If you are not fazed by someone's comments, then I don't think that is low self-esteem, but high self esteem.
hmmm I agree but it's the overall behaviour of my relatives specially my siblings, they never let me feel happy about myself, either they're comparing my financial status with someone richer or taunting me about my "transformed" looks.
I have tried not to give importance to what they say but knowing that it's coming from my own sisters really hurts.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Thick skin.....
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Kuch to log kahein ge, logon ka to kaam hai kehna. It is impossible to please people. Impossible.
I.G.N.O.R.E.
Or once and for all, tell em to keep their comments and suggestions to themselves until you ask for them.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Yeah bbc, I think I should avoid them as much as I can but it's a pity that I can't go along well even with my own sisters.
My sister wanted me to look for a rishta for her daughter and when I found one she rejected it by saying "oh meri beti kehti hai she doesn't wanna be a housewife like you".
Recently she asked me to look for a rishta again but I made excuses by saying that people demand the girl to wear niqab and the guy is too old etc.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Money and looks don't make your life happier. Tell your sisters you are happy in your life and that is all that matters. You have a great husband and great kids, and you wouldn't want to be in anyone elses shoes. They should respect you and your family. Tell them not to force their own insecurities upon you. If you start camparing yourself with others then you can never be truely happy.
Re: “You used to be so pretty”
Sisters mein kya formality… you tell em! Just go “wa’evaaaa, talk to the hand coz this face doesn’t wanna know” snap fingers
Seriously, you’re not the only one, hareem. We all have relatives who love to judge no matter what. I got really pissed at my sister’s wedding when I met all the relatives after yearssss … and some of the things they’d say made me go "whaaaaa… " My khala then calmed me down one day and told me this story about a man, his son and his donkey… The moral of the story was, logon ki adat hai batein karna. As long as you’re happy with yourself, in one ear and out the other.
PS: You are very pretty MashaAllah and I mean it 
and like arshad said, you’re blessed with a wonderful family so don’t pay any attention to logon ki batein.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
If it really bothers you then say something to your sister or just answer her back...so in the case of the daughters rishta say..."yes she's right being a housewife is hard work and I don't think your daughter could handle it".... seriously with these kinds of people there's no reason to be polite if they chose to lose all manners everytime they speak to you.
Re: “You used to be so pretty”
hehe…thanks BBQ. 
Ramsha, I know I can easily answer her back but my sister is 15 years older than me and I just can’t tell her off but yeah I could’ve said that about her daughter but it’s too late now as always, if only I had the guts to do that but I’m always too scared to hurt their feelings.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
You used to have good sight, what happened? ;)
Nah I'm just joking, there's no point in answering back, what does it matter if some horrible old person doesn't think you're pretty? They're obviously impolite, blind or just out to hurt your feelings.
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
Tell them to go to Specsavers.
Re: “You used to be so pretty”
I think you’re pretty, my opinion should be your only concern ok 
okay forreals, if someone says that just come up with something to retort back with. so you think i’m ugly? so now you’re mocking God’s creation? really? wow, what an ugly personality. smiel and walk off
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
easy to say it doesn't matter but when it's ur siblings and a consistent thing , it must get to u . Here the thing , women talk and like to talk.and they'll find something negative no matter what. BUt if its ur sis it must be stinging more. i could be wrong but maybe it's resentment that u live abroad and they r here in pakistan? my bro just got this shirt , it says DONT JEALOUS". LOL mayb u shd wear it when u cum visit them.
so instead they try n put u down through areas they know ur senstive about or attack the fact that ur a housewife , btw in usa housewives are now called "home makers" because thats what they do .
Plus if ur sis couldve just said that her daughter just wants to have the option of contuing to pursue her studies /career etc after marg ,no reason to make a snide remark at u!
Re: "You used to be so pretty"
they are just jealous of you, they dont have what you have, so just ignore them :)