Re: Would you Send your Kids...
To which side should a gentleman seat a lady?
After the completion of a formal dinner, where do you place your utensils?
When eating meat, should you cut one piece, put your knife down, then eat the piece, or should you cut all of your meat up first, and then eat the meat?
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
you didn't but hey it's always good to know what 'real' gentelmen have to put up with ..
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
I wouldn't send my children to a finishing school, but goodness me, I would love to work in one. I would be a fine teacher at a finishing school. I find the whole idea of teaching manners very appealing. Unfortunately for now, teaching English, Maths and Science will have to do.
I don't think they have many of these schools in the U.K, well I certainly have not heard of any. But whilst in America, I noticed in a children's toy shop they had books on manners for children. For eight year old girls...how to make conversation at a dinner party. I would love to attend an eight year olds dinner party.
Re: Would you Send your Kids…
thats the only one that I know the answer for, you should always cut the piece and eat at the same time instead of cutting all of your meat up first!
right?!?!
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
Lets put it this way...
If your kids NEED to go there...then that means you aint doin a good job!!
But ofcourse I can teach them the whole "code" of etiquette n what not...so I would still send them...its a good way for them not only to learn some more manners(that one can still live respectably without) but also a good opportunity for them to interact with others and actually become enlightened about certain manners whatever they may be. It will just put some reverence in their hearts for adhering to these manners when they are presented to them in a form of curriculum or workshop. It's more of a psychological way of emphasizng the importance of indoor and outdoor etiquette through a professional means.
personally, I never went to any of those schools...but i pretty much know everything i need to...for example...
1. when ur finished eating.....ehem...uh...u put ur kinves and forks in a 10:10 formation?
2. oh wait...i know this one...when women wearing skirts have to sit on a chair...their legs should look like they're glued together and must be slanted to the right.
3. and wat else...when you finish eating...dont wipe your mouth the desi way and smear the curry half way across your face...you neatly fold the napkin that was supposed to have been on your lap....and just gently touch your lips from left to right.
4.lets see....when your mama is serving you food dont hold the fork and knife in both hands like they show you on TV...let her put the food on your plate and then ...hold on..not yet...dont touch the cutlery yet!!..then you politely say "many thanks for your kind and altruistic behavior in this regard dear mother"(then ur mama pats u gently on the bak and whispers in your ear "awww...beta....why dont you cut the crap and finish your food before the next whopping session" and then she blinks a couple of times and gives you the cutest smile in whole world :S
NOW you grab the cutlery ASAP and get down to buisness!!
hmmm...i think i covered most of the code of etiquette...oh wait
9. when ur in a meeting...and you want to burp...politely let the person sitting next to you know beforehand and offer them your handkerchief so they can cover their nose...and you can proceed with the process of odorizing the air (notice the etiquette here also...i used a neutral term...odorizing...we should be considerate when talking about others....and please keep an extra handkerchief just incase there are 2 ppl nxt to you)
i mean there is a alot of stuff that kids can benefit from these finshing schools like they can learn how to finish the dinner, and dishes and laundry...so its definitely a good thing...
i say go ahead!!!!
:D
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
*British explanation:
In the early days I had heard it was custom for when a couple was walking, the lady be away from the street so the man would take any pebbles kicked up from carriages or horses. But after paved roads became more common, the custom changed for the lady to be toward the street so the man would be closest to an alley where muggers were most likely to strike from.
*a copy & Paste
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
I duno bout the rest of men but James always opens doors for me, even those weird awkward tiny doors that can only get one person across at one time, he'll open it, squeeze himself to the side and make way for me to go first.
He also makes sure that when we sit at a table or anywhere, i sit first.
He'll ask me where I wanto sit, then make sure its clean and okay for me to sit on.
He'll only sit after he's made sure that im comfortable where Im sitting.
When we are out he'll walk with a protective hand around my waist and belly.
Sometimes it seems funny but i think its kinda cute.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
After the completion of a formal dinner, where do you place your utensils?
When eating meat, should you cut one piece, put your knife down, then eat the piece, or should you cut all of your meat up first, and then eat the meat?
ahem. i shall attempt a try :p
to his right
leave 'em on your plate
cut up one piece, put your knife down and eat the piece..
Re: Would you Send your Kids…
Re: Would you Send your Kids…
these finishing schools dont teach manners..but etiquettes and social skills. You may not do it and if you are tranign you kids to be civilized proper kids its good, but go to any desi events and see kids behave like a bunch of hooligans …
no one is asking for a child to act like an old fogey, but there are children with proper etiquettes and there are children without. My general view is that most desi kids do not have either the proper manners or etiquettes. Go to a desi restaurant and observe.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
personally, I never went to any of those schools...but i pretty much know everything i need to...for example... 1. when ur finished eating.....ehem...uh...u put ur kinves and forks in a 10:10 formation? :D
I think it should be at 12:30 formation
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
isnt it in a 6.30 position??
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YA, 6.30 OR 12.30 SAME
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*a copy & Paste
If the lady walks on street side....then I would be right.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
no one is asking for a child to act like an old fogey, but there are children with proper etiquettes and there are children without. My general view is that most desi kids do not have either the proper manners or etiquettes. Go to a desi restaurant and observe.
i totally agree...ive seen desi kids and the way they behave. But its the parents who are to blame for not enforcing proper manners and basic ettiquettes in their home.
In my family (my siblings my neices and nephews) no one misbehaves in public places. Thats just the way it is for us. Proper training starts at home.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
To his right side.
Place the knife and fork parallel to one another across the plate with the knife blade facing inward toward the plate. Position the knife and fork in the position of ten o’clock to four o’clock.
When eating meat, always cut and eat one small piece at a time. If you are eating American style, you may put your knife down, switch your fork to your other hand and eat your bite. If you are eating continental style, you may cut the piece of meat and eat it without setting your knife on your plate. Continental Dining Style is becoming more prevalent today and is considered the preferred method of eating.
Re: Would you Send your Kids…
I agree, its is the failue on part of the parents to teach proper manners to their kids.
Parents are not always aware of all the etiquettes themselves, in part because they have not had to deal with it. I mean there are well to do desis from good backgrounds who have limited interactions outside of desis even after living in US or UK for decades. Their level of exposure is minimal, and what they teach may cover the general etiquettes for Pakistani society and events but smply dot know enough.
The challenge also presents itself to upwardly mobile families, who achieve material success through hard work, many parents in those cases simply dont know enough, its circumstances that they have never been in and would not find themselves in. So someone from a very underprivileged background in Pakistan, coming to US, drving a cab, setting up a store..and then sending his kids to good schools etc is the type of person I admire…but may or may not be able to guide them properly.
Secondly, depending on the age of the kid, sometimes its better that things come from others, otherwise they may just feel like they are being put down and ridiculed…what they do is just not good enough type of thing. I know i was a rebel and manythings my dad tried to teach me, I simply ignored or did opposite on purpose..until I grew the hell up 
I agree that a finishing school is not required, if the parents can teach the same things to their kids. Even if they do, such a finishing school will not hurt only help.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
At our school before school "prom", they arranged a "finishing" seminar/workshop to equip them with all these kind of manners. So we enjoyed alot on that even. And they are all westerns:)
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I think its not the debate of desi and non-desi parents teaching them etiquettes......it has broader vision than this as MR. F mentioned above.
Re: Would you Send your Kids...
It was just fantastic to see the students on "prom" night, it was wonderful expression of modern etiquettes, even we 2 teachers were sitting with 10 students at each table, so I'm well aware how they were feeling confidnet after being in "finishing seminar".