hm...if he/she is cheating than instead of thinking that whether his/her action justified or not, we should question ourselves that what went wrong? why did he/she went for someone else?
why? why? why?
ps. i think ALLAH SWT wont gonna ask us why did we forgive/or didnt forgive em? but he will for sure ask us why didn't we provide him/her the comfort he/she was looking for?
Uhh, you have got to be kidding me. Are you seriously blaming the women for their men cheating on them?
why would i be fooling around on such a serious matter? when i know that i can also be put 
in such sitation. and worst case scernio could be of me deeply in love of that man.
all i can say dont restrict yourself to one specific realm. there are many perspective to explore.
if my husband cheating on me than he is not really cheating me, he is cheating himself. and remind you he is responsible for is own actions and i will be for mine.
but i will do what my my Creator asked me to do to please him, still he is not then until i am not dead i should ask for forgivenss and constantly question my actions.
if my Creator grants me his love, it will be an honor, but if i am not then i should not commit suicide and drown myself to his level.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
well i saw some men they r not cheating their wives physically but they like other girl or some of my friends love other girl then her wife ...is it cheating ? are they cheating or doing what?
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
Well...Ladies this seems to be a common and provoking social problem.
Il shall shed light on it very soon, with literateure illustrating that polygamy may well have been in our mens horny lil genes since creation.
As a starter: FACT: the Prophet King Soloman (pbuh) had 700 Wifes and 300 Concubines.
More coming Soon.....
The Girl with Hijab.Avatar.....u watch too...chronology has nothing to do with it...
And Matine.Siren..your post displays total ignorance in both comprehending my post and the Koran.
My post was 100% perfect.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
guwd topic
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
Amir. The day, nay, the hour in which you manage to command an army of Djinns, I give you my honourable word - That with no hesitation, I will personally round up 300 bitznitches with which you can have your way.
Untill then, you should keep your ignorant bleatings to yourself.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
What King soloman did thats his business. I never undermined his piousness.
But Infact prophets and other pious people who never had those super powers still had many wives/slaves-concubine types.
But it seems you imply from your post, succesful men can have more *****/wives?
Is that so.. Well i see your men in arabia commonly having 2-4 wives. Are they all superior some how to other men?
Well regardles...more to come...watch this space
What King soloman did thats his business. I never undermined his piousness. But Infact prophets and other pious people who never had those super powers still had many wives/slaves-concubine types.
But it seems you imply from your post, succesful men can have more *****/wives?
Is that so.. Well i see your men in arabia commonly having 2-4 wives. Are they all superior some how to other men?
Well regardles...more to come...watch this space
If it's his bishnish alone, stop talking about himself and the rest of men-kind as though you are all synonamous. :) We all know there are levels of equality (and unfortunately of IQ too). What I ask of you is to know your place in the grander scheme of things.
My offer still stands.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
ermm..hitchki if im not wrong wasnt it u bleating a couple weeks ago on another thread how the world population is increasing beyond its provideble and copeble resources.
And I am only aiming to illustrate the possible instinctual polygamous desire of men.
And when we try to refer something instinctual it must be able to be correlated from way back right of creation right..?
Your offer.....Lady what makes u think i need to have super powers in order to pull a few chicks.
How many super-powers do your arabian arab men counter-parts posess that attract multiple to them multiple wives. Oh Maybe the rubber tyre bellies count for you..
Yeh you were right many's IQ and comprehension does indeed suffer on gupshup.
There is no inequality between human beings thats is what Prophet (pbuh) came to convey.
And the sunnath/lifestyle of the Prophet's are the one to take as ideal, that are most healthy and beneficial for mankind.
Nice Information, Tnx for this .
Thanks for liking the information. You're welcome for it.
It's easy to say we would ditch our husband if he cheats. But the nature of marriage is that the man always has the upper hand. For example, let's take a woman who is 40 with 3 kids. Her changes for remarriage are virtually nil. However, the same situation for a man will have no problem. Forget about remarrying, even if she wants to stay single, usually the wife is financially too weak to live independently.
So if a woman finds out her husband is cheating, and she is a stay-at-home mom with 3,4 kids, it becomes a very painful and difficult decision. Should she run back to her family in Pakistan, displacing her kids out of school and being potentially dependent on relatives for 20 years? Should she go to a homeless shelter and risk being tossed around by the social service system? Should she work some minimum wage job? After all that's all she is going to get with staying home so long. Then who is going to take care of her kids?
With these poor alternatives in mind, it becomes a lot easier to let such behavior slide or to console one's self, saying "he's going to change." It's not as black and white as "women are materialistic and greedy, they would rather have a designer purse than a faithful husband."
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
Women should go for education, so you can always leave if there is a need!
and a jalebi sounds delish right now!
AGREE. I firmly believe that education is a MUST for a woman. It provides her security for emergency situations in life.
he might stop and realize the error of his ways..so no i wouldn<t leave.
anyways i don<t think i<d have a choice.
the alternative doesn<t soudn really wonderful either, have finanical trouble and be alone with a whole bunch of repsonsibilties esp if you have kids.
p.s- even if you are educated, it doesn<t mean the money troubles won<t exist.
he might stop and realize the error of his ways..so no i wouldn<t leave.
anyways i don<t think i<d have a choice.
the alternative doesn<t soudn really wonderful either, have finanical trouble and be alone with a whole bunch of repsonsibilties esp if you have kids.
p.s- even if you are educated, it doesn<t mean the money troubles won<t exist.
good point.
an education doesnt always help u get back on ur feet either. if you've been a housewife/stay at home mom for 10 yrs...what good is an education then? getting into the work force will be difficult...and lets not forget about being dependent on your spouse financially (if u werent working).
good point.
an education doesnt always help u get back on ur feet either. if you've been a housewife/stay at home mom for 10 yrs...what good is an education then? getting into the work force will be difficult...and lets not forget about being dependent on your spouse financially (if u werent working).
I understand that education can't magically resolve the emotional turmoil a woman is experiencing. But let's assume that a woman has been a housewife for 10 years and gets divorced. And lets say that her husband is a lousy man who does not do a good job providing financial support for the children. Or perhaps he only provides enough for the children but there's no money for her own personal needs. In a situation like this, not having an education.............can make things TOUGHER for the woman.
Education is not a miracle drug that takes your pain away. It is something that can help prevent things from being worse. Think of it as a supplement......for when and if the woman DOES decide to get back on her feet. Education and emotional turmoil are two different things. They can't be compared. The former is to help support a woman in becoming more independent once she comes out of the turmoil and decides to take control of her life.
Nobody said that educated people don't experience money problems. YES they can also have money issues. However.........things are a bit easier for someone who has a degree.............as opposed to someone who is working at Taco Bell for a minimum wage..........which isn't enough to support oneself let alone kids.
I understand that education can't magically resolve the emotional turmoil a woman is experiencing. But let's assume that a woman has been a housewife for 10 years and gets divorced. And lets say that her husband is a lousy man who does not do a good job providing financial support for the children. Or perhaps he only provides enough for the children but there's no money for her own personal needs. In a situation like this, not having an education.............can make things TOUGHER for the woman.
Education is not a miracle drug that takes your pain away. It is something that can help prevent things from being worse. Think of it as a supplement......for when and if the woman DOES decide to get back on her feet. Education and emotional turmoil are two different things. They can't be compared. The former is to help support a woman in becoming more independent once she comes out of the turmoil and decides to take control of her life.
Nobody said that educated people don't experience money problems. YES they can also have money issues. However.........things are a bit easier for someone who has a degree.............as opposed to someone who is working at Taco Bell for a minimum wage..........which isn't enough to support oneself let alone kids.
with the economy the way it is today....ppl with degrees are taking those minimum wage jobs you are talking about.
....and without having any job related experience....landing a job would be a miracle even for a person with a degree. If and when they do land a job...they wont be getting paid very well.
I am all for degrees and education ( i myself have a few under my belt)dont get me wrong. But i have seen some of the wealthiest ppl that dont have any degrees but have job experience.
It's a challenge for a woman to get back on her feet if she wasnt working....degree or no degree the difficulty will be the same regardless. perhaps she will be better off in the long run....but initially she will be struggling and with kids the struggle will be worse.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
The struggle will be hard, I acknowledge that. But having a degree is like a precaution. With the strained economy, people might be turning to minimum wage jobs. But while you're working that minimum wage job..........it provides a little relief to know that you have a degree.......that just MAYBE could get you a better paying professional job.......if the opportunity arises. It represent a possibility, a ray of hope, an opportunity for the future.........amidst the struggles. And sometimes economies can get better.
I never said that a degree is like a drug for emotional pain. They are two different things that can't be compared. I'm just saying that it's like a practical precaution. Yes........a woman will still have to motivate herself to get that job......whether she has a degree or not. But it's something that can help provide opportunities for security.
Education can't heal emotional pain. But it can't hurt. It can only help....sooner or later. But I also understand what you're saying....much of our motivation has to come from within :)
whenever I think of my friends, who had cheating/abusive dads, I feel bad that at one point, their moms were probably excited to plan their shaadis with these guys. And they were all charming, professional men, and no one would ever guess their character. Remembering these experience, makes me feel even more motivated to get a job.
People think it's about greed, or that I'm expecting my hubby to be crappy, but I feel it's just a personal form of insurance. No one drives planning to have a car accident, right? But we all know it does happen so we carry insurance. So I feel like keeping one foot in the job market, is like an insurance. Sometimes the policy doesn't cover enough, but it's worth having.
Re: would u alllow ur husband to cheat?
i doo think its not easy to cheat your hubby if he is cheating to u or getting divorce from him.yeh josh aur ghusse mai kai howa faisla hoga its not practical. wives are some how at weaker side and they have to compromise.. financially may b by working u can survive but this world is full of animals u need some ones name ...other wise these animals will starts taking u forgranted.if u r married and he is cheating u what ever problems u have....no man will dare to take u granted as some ones name is attached to u and u r izzat of him...
whta if when u fight and say to ur hubby i m gona get affair as well and he will say 3 words to u in anger then what your life is finished..he will re marry and society v r living males marriges even after divorced not seeing by bad eyes but what about your life ..if u have kids they will suffer yr family your parenst will feel bad...might get any health issue because of shocked..u will b facing such cruel society and every one blames u no one will c his fault ..and then re marrying is also difficult which single good boy wana marry a divorced girl..?? which inlaws will accept a divorced bahu....specially when u have kids?
and if u dont wana re marry then what about your needs ..pysical needs..and if u forget about this thing as well then later in life when u turn 50,60 u need some mental emottional support ..u need one to share your dukh sukh at 50,60 ...
yr siblings will b bussy with their family when u turn 50...
once i heard from mrs bilqees edhi k beta zamane main sub ki thokaron main pare rehne se behter hai kisi ik ki thokroon main raho :)
be careful before marrige...try to chose a right man ..rest is your fate..