Re: Women and Islam
Salam Alaikom sisters and brothers, I am an English revert to Islam and wear hijab, pray (Inshallah) 5 times a day and strive to learn about Islam and practice according to the quran and sunnah. Not always so easy but may Allah swa forgive me my mistakes. I spent a little time in Pakistan in 2005 & would seriously love to come again for a lot longer. as would my non-muslim birth brothers. I had a few debates about Islam whilst there and found the 'fusion' of culture & faith both a cause of celebration and sadness. Celebration because there I found some of the most humble and honourable people who strive so hard in many small ways to preserve Islam with integrity, and sad because of such a denial of women's basic Islamic rights.
What was ironic was that I was really admired for my knowledge as a woman who is a revert and have encouraged my husband (a Pakistani Brit born) to learn and also practice... (we kinda 'nudge' each other along now!) Yet many women are unable to express who they would have for a husband, thier mother-in-law's beat them (why? This is so inhumane and completely un-Islamic) and women do not attend masjid. Yet, it is a sunnah that every muslim- man, woman and child to attend masjid at Eid festivals and also the right of every woman to go to masjid for her salah...or 'namaz'. Our beloved Prophet p.b.u.h once had to instruct his own daughter to leave her prayers during Taraweeh during Ramadan because she had used a rope to hold her upright. She was not banned from masjid, she was reminded to rest!
Pakistan has the serenity of the Adhan 5 times a day (something I miss even now) women predominantly wear a covering for thier hair, and some the niqab. BUT, in discussion with many uncles I was dismayed to learn that many who had more than one wife did not pretend to treat them equally (the Quran is explicit in that men may only marry one wife if by having more creates inequality and injustice), that a prevailent attitude was Islam is my faith - not my way of life. The two are synonymous, one cannot be without the other! Islam is so clear...women's rights are not an optional extra for men to 'indulge' if they feel so inclined. The rights are there because Allah S.W.A knows man's weaknesses!
Women do not enter society regularly (the point of covering is so that women can move freely within society and should only need a chaperone for longer distance travel).
I loved the family oriented culture, the nurturing of the mothers (but some were clearly disinterested in their off-spring...a result of 'arranged marriage?) and could be cruel!
I have many friends here from around the muslim globe...Jordanian, Pakistani, Indian, Moroccon, Syrian, Egyptian and so on (we are very diverse here because there is a small community and so we have come together...Alhamdulillah). From ALL these friends I have witnessed injustices from the husbands towards the wives...not always the same things, and some of the sisters as either (in one case) injustice to their own children, or being manipulative with the husband (in one case), I have always been astonished by many sisters who do not govern the behaviour and beliefs they watch their children display and cultivate and admire the many who do.
Islam is only as strong in the person as the person's desire to cultivate it. Many women, who have husband working all day, DO have an oppurtunity to teach their sons' Islamic attitudes and beliefs. They could say...'help your mother to clean, cook etc... but what I find more common even from supposedly educated people is...its a womans' job...if she has a daughter then somehow 'mother' becomes 'queen' and passes the responsibilities onto her child.
In Islam it is the duty of Mothers' to educate all of the children, to instruct in Islam and to be kind, to instill obedience (with a smack if necessary- but not violent beatings for minor misdemeanours) and so on. My daughter and son watch and listen to me performing my Salah and my daughter now joins me. They are learning by example. I attend masjid when I can, and our women come together at masjid once a month and eat together. I think these things are positive.
We also do try to intervene gently when we see each other behaving inappropriately with our husbands or children and do remind each other of certain Sunnah, Hadeeths, Rights and of times to pray etc. I think women being included in masjid is a valuable aspect of preserving and enjoying Islam.
What do you think?