Wives - Sunnah

Society Religion & Philosophy
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So we are supposed to follow the sunnah of Holy Prophet PBUH and immitate his acts as much as we can. But why not when it comes to having wives? Correct me if im wrong but Holy Prophet PBUH was married 9 times, but muslim men can only marry 4 times.

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Re: Wives - Sunnah

Yeah sure. Yeh sunnah (in it's distorted form) follow karnay kay liye kafir bhi muslim ho jaatein hein.

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why is it distorted and why shudnt we follow that sunnah?

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  1. Distorted: If you wanna follow it as 'sunnah' then do it to provide support (of all kinds) to the women who need it AFTER permission from your 1st/1st 3 wives. If she/they does/do not allow it, another marriage is HARAM. Dont make it an exucse to have variety of sex partners.

  2. Follow the sunnah if you fulfil all the requisites (mentioned above and more which you can find out after talking in detail with an ASLI muttawwa).

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Re: Wives - Sunnah

Our Messenger pbuh was the most truthful, trustworthy, and tolerant person in his time, even before he sopke of Islam.

So Mr. Lussi, are you ready to follow the three golden habits of our Messenger pbuh? Or you are still stuck with sex and women?

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Re: Wives - Sunnah

Funny i was just reading abt the prophets SAW’s wives, for a paper I have to do… it reported that even the Prophet’s wives were not above jealousy and arguing an:d fighting..

If you wanna remarry, you hav to do it for ht eright reasons, not just to have sex with a new person.. :rolleyes:

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Re: Wives - Sunnah

Wrong.
they can marry as many times as they want, subject to some conditions and rules.
They can not have MORE THAN 4 wives at any given time.
Technically speaking … :flower1:

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Thanks bhaijaan… looking at other way, it also provides a lot of flexibility.. you dont get all qualities in one woman for sure.. I will go for more than one wife cuz its good to be in company and 2 is not a company plus you will different qualities in different wives.. my friend mir, has 2 and he thinks thats the best thing he did- marrying two wives.. they are friends and sisters. Jazakallah

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PLUS if one reads Quran, a person can find out that prophet marrying more than 4 at a time and a man only having restriction of upto 4 is a COMMAND of Allah. Hence, attributing such act of the Prophet:saw: as a Sunnah that can be followed is ABSOLUTELY **Wrong. **That Sunnah is not meant to be followed as per Quran.

I am impressed
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hmm interesting..are you sure? so this means one can have like 20 wives but as long as he doesn’t have 4 simeltenously..its ok?

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and my questions is not about sex...if a guy just wants sex then marrying again is the worst option..but thats another topic..

i just want to know that howcome muslims cant follow the wives sunnah..

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I think the rule of marrying 4 does'nt apply on Prophet (SAW) (bcoz he was Prophet not a common man)and the rule was for the followers of Prophet Muhammad(saw).

Mil Gaiiiiii
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do you know how expensive its gonna be to get married 4 times?

why do I have this feeling that our religion is based solely on male percpective. maybe i am wrong but thats the way it looks.

  1. I can have 4 wives at the same time, the total number is not the restriction.

  2. I will also get 70 Hoors if I die faithful.

what about women? to me as we claim Islam gives equality to men and women, should they be allowed/treated the same or are we being hypocrite?

Mil Gaiiiiii
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marrying 4 is'nt easy man.......a great responsibility.
In Islam man has more responsibility than woman.They are even responsible of women for thier food and clothing.Women don't have responsibility except raising her children.
Pious women will have purified mate also in jannah.inshaAllah.Hoors are only jannati creatures.don't think they are women or like women.and there shall be no impurity in jannah.don't think worldly 4 wives or more as jannati creature hoor.
in pagan arab before islam women used to have huband more than 1.....the idea of husband more than 1 is disgusting for woman.it is almost humiliation.and you can't tell without dna test.........whose baby is that.

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marrying 4 times is easy or not is not the question. the question is, is it equal treatment?
some women act more responsible than men what about them?
what if women has her own means of wealth eg inheritance and all, meaning she is self sufficient infact can support her husband as well?

BTW IMHO raising children is a bigger responsibility than taking care of four wives.

will it be a mate or mates? who will it be?
the hoors will be there for our pleasure or not?
if its only 1 mate vs 70 hoors again I see unequality?
and what do mean by purified?

I don't understand what do you mean... please explain a bit more.

Your point in babies issues is taken... you are correct that it will be hard to say who is begotten by whom.

but your comment about more than 1 husband is just your opinion, which is biased by the society we live in. because not only religiously but its a social taboo as well.

if from the begining there were more than 1 husband to a woman it might not seem so odd.

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I will answer your all questions inshaAllah.......may be in the evening.

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**Question:**Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

Answer]Definition of PolygamyPolygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?**2. **The Qur’an is the only religious scripture in the world that says,“marry only one”.
The Qur’an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ‘marry only one’. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one
Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives
]In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.
[Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.
3. ****Hindus are more polygynous than MuslimsThe report of the ‘Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam’, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.
Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.
4. Qur’an permits limited polygyny
As I mentioned earlier, Qur’an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ‘marry only one’. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur’an:Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.
In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:
Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women…"
[Al-Qur’an 4:129]
Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one with][size=2]Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do’s and Don’ts

  • Fard’ i.e. compulsory or obligatory]

  • ]‘Mustahab’ i.e. recommended or encouraged‘Mubah’ i.e. permissible or allowed]‘Makruh’ i.e. not recommended or discouraged Haraam’ i.e. prohibited or forbidden[Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife**5. **Average life span of females is more than that of males[/ul]By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers6. ]India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide
India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.World female population is more than male population In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males]Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical
Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first. In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life. Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.] http://www.irf.net/irf/images/back.gif](“http://www.irf.net/irf/images/back.gif”)[/size]

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Question: If a man is allowed to have more than one wife, then why does Islam prohibit a woman from having more than one husband?**Answer: **A lot of people, including some Muslims, question the logic of allowing Muslim men to have more than one spouse while denying the same ‘right’ to women. Let me first state emphatically, that the foundation of an Islamic society is justice and equity. Allah has created men and women as equal, but with different capabilities and different responsibilities. Men and women are different, physiologically and psychologically. Their roles and responsibilities are different. Men and women are equal in Islam, but not identicalSurah Nisa’ Chapter 4 verses 22 to 24 gives the list of women with who you can not marry and it is further mentions in Surah Nisa’ Chapter 4 verse 24 "Also (prohibited are) women already married
]The following points enumerate the reasons why polyandry is prohibited in Islam:1. If a man has more than one wife, the parents of the children born of such marriages can easily be identified. The father as well as the mother can easily be identified. In case of a woman marrying more than one husband, only the mother of the children born of such marriages will be identified and not the father. Islam gives tremendous importance to the identification of both parents, mother and father. Psychologists tell us that children who do not know their parents, especially their father undergo severe mental trauma and disturbances. Often they have an unhappy childhood. It is for this reason that the children of prostitutes do not have a healthy childhood. If a child born of such wedlock is admitted in school, and when the mother is asked the name of the father, she would have to give two or more names! I am aware that recent advances in science have made it possible for both the mother and father to be identified with the help of genetic testing. Thus this point which was applicable for the past may not be applicable for the present2. Man is more polygamous by nature as compared to a woman.3. Biologically, it is easier for a man to perform his duties as a husband despite having several wives. A woman, in a similar position, having several husbands, will not find it possible to perform her duties as a wife. A woman undergoes several psychological and behavioral changes due to different phases of the menstrual cycle4. A woman who has more than one husband will have several sexual partners at the same time and has a high chance of acquiring venereal or sexually transmitted diseases which can also be transmitted back to her husband even if all of them have no extra-marital sex. This is not the case in a man having more than one wife, and none of them having extra-marital sexThe above reasons are those that one can easily identify. There are probably many more reasons why Allah, in His Infinite Wisdom, has prohibited polyandryhttp://www.irf.net/irf/images/back.gif](“http://www.irf.net/irf/images/back.gif”)

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*1. Hoor mentioned in the Quran *
The word hoor occurs in the Qur’an in no less than four different places:

  1. In Surah Dukhan chapter 44, verse 54 “Moreover, We shall join them to companions With beautiful, big and lustrous eyes.” [Al-Quran 44:54] In Surah Al-Tur chapter 52 verse 20 “...And We shall join them to companions, with beautiful, big and lustrous eyes.” [Al-Quran 52:20] In Surah Rahman chapter 55 verse 72 “Companions restrained (as to their glances), in goodly pavilions.” [Al-Quran 55:72]
  2. In Surah Al-Waqiah chapter 56 verse 22 “And (there will be) companions with beautiful, big and lustrous eyes.” [Al-Quran 56:22] ]2. Hoor Translated as Beautiful Maidens

Many translators of the Quran have translated the word hoor as ‘beautiful maidens’ especially in the Urdu translations. If hoor means ‘beautiful maidens’ or girls, then they are meant only for the men. Hence, what will the women get if they enter Paradise? ]3. Meaning of Hoor

The word hoor is actually the plural of ahwar (applicable to man) and of haura (applicable to woman) and signifies a person having eyes characterized by hauar a special quality bestowed upon a good soul, male or female in paradise and it denotes the intense whiteness of the white part of the spiritual eye.
The Quran describes in several other verses that in paradise you will have azwaj which mean a pair or spouse or companion which means you will have spouses or companions pure and holy (mutaharratun means pure, holy).
“But give glad tidings to those who believe and work righteousness, that their portion is gardens, beneath which rivers flow. Every time they are fed with fruit there from, they say: “Why, this is what we were fed with before”, for they are given things in similitude; and they have therein companions pure (and holy); and they abide therein (forever)”. [Al-Quran 2:25]
“But those who believe and do deeds of righteousness, We shall soon admit to Gardens, with rivers flowing beneath - their eternal home; therein shall they have companions pure and holy: we shall admit them to shades, cool and ever deepening”. [Al-Quran 4:57]
Therefore the word hoor has no specific gender. Mohammad Asad has translated the word hoor as spouse and Abdullah Yusuf Ali as companion. Therefore according to some scholars a man in paradise will have a hoor that is a beautiful maiden with beautiful big and lustrous eyes and a woman in paradise will get a man with beautiful big and lustrous eyes.]4. Women will get something exceptional in Paradise
Many scholars say that in context, the word hoor used in the Quran refers only to ladies since gents are addressed. A reply that would be accepted by all types of people would rather be the answer given in the Hadith when a similar question was posed that if a man gets a hoor, a beautiful Maiden in Paradise, then what will the women get? The reply was that the women will get that which the heart has not desired for, the ear hasn’t heard off and the eye hasn’t seen, indicating that even the women will get something exceptional in Paradise.

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prove it.