At the end of the day it is all down to personal choice. If you want to have several events, a trillion outfits, give gifts then go ahead and do it if you can afford to do so.
Many of you ladies here have had the events you wanted, so do not criticise those who want to do something different.
As for giving jahez, the parents only do it with the intention that their daughters will have an easier life – I do not think that there is anything wrong with wanting to eliminate any stresses for your daughter in her future life or that this should be criticised. Although it does not necessarily mean that it will be an easy marriage, because no one knows what life has in store. However, i do agree that this not should be given because it is demanded, but freely and with love.
Sweetpip, this giving away stuff in the name of love and best of intentions has been more than abused! hence the discussion. All the things that are expected to be provided by the girl's father, are the husband's responsibility! I think it only promotes greed! We know our society better than anyone..and we know thats exactly what has happened... people demanding shamelessly..and the other half caving in.