…one of the very major reason is the girl, who is coming into the new home, new family FULLY PREPARED not to accept the new family as her own. And then we say, oh the guy’s family never gave her the chance to adjust and accept.
I am sorry but i am not gonna shy away from saying that this negativity is gifted to the girls mostly by their mothers. And What a pity, that most mothers have provided a reason for their own child’s divorce or broken home.
Re: Why Marriages Fail and How.
I have noticed that confrontational approach from very get go .
what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
hi frnds..its very common que Love marriage is gud aur arrange marriage??
but i want to disscuss the basic logics or philosophies...why we say love marriage is better then arrange..or on the other side why we give proffer to arrange marriage rather dn love...
plz give ur own veiws abt this topic
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
None:D
Re: what do u think..what is better…love marrige or arrange
**dar-e-haqeeqat It depends on victims and circumstances **
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
who says love marriage is better then arranged?
for centuries we have had 99.999999 percent arranged marriages and the reamining .000001 percent love marriages have proven to be 99.99999999 failures.
what the new age kids call love is a mere timely "Crush" and is the bubble bursts as soon as the facts of life come in play.
if we follow the path of the western countries we should also be aware of the divorce rates amond the love birds that rush into marriages wihtout giving it a serious thought.
so my vote is for arranged marriages.
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
I believe you need ALOT of courage and stemina to do LOVE MARRIAGE and I think being an unexperienced girl I can't recognize any person's ACTUAL behaviour and mannerism, I can only get fascinated by the way he talks to me APPARENTLY. What if I got married with the person of my choice and later I had to bear his abusive lang about me and what if he never gave any value to my self-respect? I don't think there would be any turning back for me after marriage. these fears should be kept in mind while getting into any relationship before marriage because I believe before marriage you can't understand any person completely no matter how close you both seem to be. My exposure about creature called human is NILL and that's why I have lost my trust on LOVE marriage.
Re: Why Marriages Fail and How.
I guess its the same with some inlaws as well ... they pull their guards up , from the day of the shadi ... and then to top it all if the girl also comes in the "confront mood" ... the fights and misunderstandings start from day one.
When I got married , my inlaws , who are generally very nice people , but some of them started telling my husband you have changed ... they kept saying it for a good few days , but I tried not to put up a fight against this and just stayed quiet .... ultimately it died down... but if i had fought back, then the war would have started ....
The girl does play a very imprtant role in her future relationships , patience goes a long way .... its very very hard though ....
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
to each its own...both have pros and cons --- but i dont agree with the fact that love marriages always end - i've seen many MashAllah se that are going strong - so it really depends on the two making it work
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
oh god, not ANOTHER one of these threads!
Get over it already please! Marriage is over rated!
dont get married! had enuff of inlaw stories to last me a lifetime!
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
like good news said ... it depends on people and howmuch they are willing to compromise
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
Whatever method, got to be mature, resilient and independent about it.
Arranged marriage - you're virtually forced by people around you not to give up. Social norm.
Love marriages - people are waiting in the wings for a minor problem to say 'TOLD YOU SO!' - less support.
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
Its not the gun , its the man behind the gun . Neither is better if you can't work for it . Both can be successful if you are willing to make it work .
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
Developing Love after arranged marriage.
Arranged marriage is not always a forced one and is just a myth.
Love marriage has too many serious issues also.
There is more willingness to compromise in arranged marriage.
And none in perfect. Relation between two individuals has potential of ups and downs.
Re: what do u think..what is better...love marrige or arrange
Arranged. Reason: for me to know :@:
righttttoooo:k:
OMG! I'm seriously pissed rite now. This is nt the first time my topic has been merged with a topic that is def not the same. Whoever did it, r u blind or just dumb?
Was i talking abt the failure of love marriages? I DON'T THINK SO! I think its time u practise your mod-skills at better topics where all that crap is happening.
[QUOTE]
A successful marriage does not depend on the type of marriage but on the type of people.
[/QUOTE]
so true.
And they always end up leaving the White wife for the Pakistani wife, Why? Because of family nagging them bending their ear. Why cant people stand up to mummy and daddy? Why are desi men so scared to express what they want? But instead you end up with 3-4 mixed race children with no dad. And God knows what future they have. And 3-4 Pakistani children with the dad and end up following the same footsteps as daddy. OH but it will be a arranged marriage ofcourse. No love marriage for these children. God Forbid that ever happens. Rolls eyes
I hear you... I encountered such cases too and it made me very sick, especially when the "dads" totally neglected the mixed race children. :-((