Mostly boys from upper middle/ middle class with sold education/ or reasonable good professional CV is worth looking at.
sir ji that may be your personal preference and I really am not judging you by it, far from it.
I am usually more interested in looking at girls though. :p
PS: yes I am generally a bayhooda wahiaat insaan as noted in my signature below..see
sir ji that may be your personal preference and I really am not judging you by it, far from it.
I am usually more interested in looking at girls though. :p
PS: yes I am generally a bayhooda wahiaat insaan as noted in my signature below..see
Yes! thanks for pointing out, it is also possible that despite thinking myself so open yet still have some stereotype hidden deep inside me.
*good, decent, educated, stable girls in pakistan don't need any ABCD or BBCD to fulfill their lives! They are quite happy with their lives, and don't even bother for any silly green-card. These are dreams of below average families. *
So it really makes me wonder about these pakistani families abroad, that what were they when they were still in pakistan. and why are they getting the kind of girls that apparently everyone is complaining about. and what kind of networks are they associated with back home.
Good girls (by any definition) get taken first, and the not so good ones, it takes a little time for them. the wedding section if full of pictures of girls and boys being married. i wonder who they are and why and how they ever got married.
general rule of thumb. boys look for a life-partner. not a second/primary earner for the household. so no matter how much you achieve, at the end of the day, if you're 30 and then looking, it is going to get tough. it happens in every other society/culture too.
DITTO!!!pata nahin yar mujhe kafi hasad mehsoos hori hai pak girls ke khilaf lol...
and ironically..the unjustified attacks on us just reaffirmed my assertion abt the lack of tolerance! but anyway...all this shadi stuff is in Allah's hands!:)
The whole premise of this retarted thread is that if a guy marries someone from Pakistan then he is evil and girls here can't marry guys from Pakistan because they are all evil over there. Or simple if you have anything to do with Pakistan then you are evil.
Well the OP must be a blond with blue eyes, otherwise with this pea size mentality I don't see her going much far.
Instead of dreaming for some prince charming to come and sweep you off your feet, because Pakistan is SOOOO horrible, why don't you take some of your hard-earned education and intelligence and WORK to make Pakistan a better place? It starts with simple community service around your city.
But, nope. That's not something we desi girls value, right? It's all about - get the man, and then sit back and enjoy.
over generalization. and the way you are advising girls seems that you view someone wishing to move abroad as negative. if that's the case then aren't you and your family from among the same category who dreamed of moving and settling abroad and did that.
So because you guys have a bigoted culture and you educate your girls to spruce up their rishtaa CV's and oh-dear-the-poor-girl-cannot-be-allowed-to-step-out-of-the-house, you're going to be fishing in MY POND and going after MY MEN?
Uh-uh.
Plenty of retards in pakistan to marry. Leave our boys alone.
We work our ARSES off here, and I know LOTS of well-educated girls going into their 30's that no one wants to marry, because perfectly good guys are being transported back to get some desi girl who gets here and then makes trouble for everyone and even further isolates those 30 year old working women who are just trying to find a mate and settle down.
No sir. Because your parents don't let you out of your homes is NO EXCUSE. That's why Pakistan is the way it is. About 54% of the population is sheerly repressed.
You OWN all the men in US? WOW
If they truly were your boys they wouldn't be looking for girls elsewhere, would they?
to the original question of OP, from what we have seen in the families living in US & UK the reason they prefer to marry a girl from back home is the high tolerance level among the girls in Pakistan. the guys and their families have this perception that girls in Pakistan are much more tolerant than the girls raised abroad. i won't comment whether they are right in thinking so or not, because i have seen the girls both abroad and in Pakistan with such low tolerance levels.
anyhow, there is absolutely nothing wrong if guys from abroad want to settle down with girls from Pakistan and if girls from abroad want to settle down with guys from Pakistan. in an era where everything is global, how can you even imagine to limit someone to get married to the persons living in the same country.
one thing i don't understand is why do guys who are born and raised in america marry girls from pakistan?
What about the girls in america? They don't have the luxary to do that. Where are they to find rishta's???
This confuses me because those girls who are born and raised in America the proper way, and by proper way i mean they have accepted their culture and the weatern culture and have blended to stay true of themselves and their religion. Those girls who know its not right to date, drink, go clubbing etc.
why is it that those girls get punished? They end up being left to rot, or they have to fend for themselves... these things tick me off.
So i guess i want people to explain to me why is this right? why do men do this? I need to understand cause it's not fair....
thanks for letting me vent....
Zahra
Because they don't give us email/facebook IDs when we ask for them.
^ Desi mothers, who have experienced ALL the unfairness of desi society's attitude toward women, don't want to make life easier for the future generation of women. Instead they want the young women who come after them to suffer in the same way. That's how I see it.
They want a "bahu" who is basically pure, virgin, innocent, meek, submissive, passive.....a doormat.....who dare not challenge or question their decisions.....who will do all the housework and tolerate any abuse without complaint. And they firmly believe that a girl born and brought up in the motherland embodies these "praiseworthy" attributes.
In some cases, desi parents feel that they should get a girl from Pak because she might be able to "FIX" their messed up son or would be too naive to see that he is messed up, or perhaps he's having a harder time finding someone suitable and think that it will be eaiser to find a girl from Pak.
People are also picky about other things regarding rishtas. To each their own. Do you really want to have in-laws with such narrow views who have already made up their mind about you before even getting to know you? Their views are merely an opinion, not a fact. I've noticed that some girls brought up in Pak can be more chalak and shrewd than their western counterparts. Try not to dwell on them. Someone who is worth your time will get take the time to get to know you.
This.
The mother and the son usually want some passive doormat.
Frankly, taking a daughter away from her parents to another country is cruel. I'd never do it.
Men treat women like dirt, women end up becoming twisted as a result, and subject the new generation of women to the same cruelty they went through. They do men's job for them.
When men become lazy, entitled and arrogant, they utterly destroy the women around them.
Is that what you girls abroad tell yourselves when we choose a home grown gal? Does it help you sleep? Does it ease the pain?
Maybe they are more sensible? Down to earth with good perspectives. Unlike you girls who blame everything under the sun for your problems, failing to realise that you are your own worst enemy.
Its funny that when guys get rejected for any reason, usually we pick and move on. Just you girls who feel the need to throw a hissy fit.
Those were my views 5 years ago. I felt surprised when I read my own post; it's a rather btchy and stupid post; not one that I'm proud of. Maula Jatt is right in saying that there can be many reasons for gravitating toward girls back home; they can and do make excellent wives; our own mothers are positive examples so we don't have have to look far from home. It's wrong to stereotype these two groups of women, to pit them against one another. We all have our preferences and there's no point in fuming over prospects you don't even know, who are total strangers. It does hurt though when you're turned down by someone you invested emotional energy in. Maybe it's too over-simplified of me to say this, but we think and worry too much though it's hard not to be fearful about the future, we begrudge people for what they get and what they have and maybe in doing so we earn ourselves gunnah, cuz in the end you will get what's in your qismat just like everyone else.
Mothers that come from Pakistan tell their sons its better for them but in actuality its a selfish decision that is better for the mothers...or so they think. LOL. Girls that grow up here should look at it as a favor done to them. DO you want to be a part of a family that looks at you in such a way? Um...NOT ME.
Be happy you're not caught in their drama.
THIS. Count your lucky stars you don't have to be involved with people who have this way of thinking.