I think we could all benefit from a bit of open-mindedness. I don't think it's the case that that girls raised in Pakistan are XYZ and Pakistani girls raised in the west are ABC...I think it's a case of people being a bit too picky and narrow minded when it's time to find a spouse for their child. There's nothing wrong with being a bit picky...it's a big decision and should be made carefully. But the pickiness shouldn't be taken to such a point that you miss the big picture for the small details.
For example, Aunty A will bemoan the fact that she can't find a seedhi saadhi ladki for her chanda in her area when there are actually 20 girls who match that description within a 10 mile radius. So what's the problem? The girls aren't fair enough or thin enough or something else enough in Aunty's eyes. Aunty B wants a shareef ladka for her daughter...but will wait until said daughter is 50 years old because even though there are quite a few of those shareef ladkas in the area...none of them are doctors...only lowly engineers and businessmen. Or perhaps one of them is a doctor but he is DIVORCED. The horror!
I know I'm stereotyping a bit right now, but honestly, when I'm at a social gathering, there is almost always at least ONE person going on about how there is NO ONE who is appropriate for her child even though I could easily point out 5 individuals who meet her criteria...but I know she won't consider them because they don't look a certain way, don't make enough, don't have the right profession, don't live in the right type of home, etc. And it's sad because there are tons of great people out there - both in the West and Pakistan - who deserve to be matched up with people just as stellar as they are...but don't get that opportunity because they don't live up to some ultimately pointless expectation.
Oh boy...I think I may have derailed this time. Sorry stoppit.
very well said ... i cldn't have said it better myselffff