Re: Who’s the Bride???
Okay…I said to myself that I wouldn’t bring this up again after Mrs. Shikra’s thread about what to wear to a western wedding…but then I went to the Bridal Pics thread and found the subject being discussed there as well. So I thought let’s just have it out…
Okay…so based on my knowledge of culture and tradition I can confirm for you that it is considered perfectly okay to wear your own wedding or valima outfit to the wedding of your siblings or closest family members.
Most of the folks in the middle-class income category do not spend thousands of rupees on an outfit to pack it away in a nice window box from the dry-cleaners in hopes of having their daughter or grand-daughter do them the honor of selecting to alter it and wear it to her own wedding.
I guess we are a more practical bunch and feel that an outfit THAT expensive deserves another round or two. My wedding was taking place just before my eldest BIL’s and I purposely asked for a lehnga in a colour other than red so that I could wear it to the event and also wear it to other weddings without being accused of competing or taking the limelight from the bride. Yes, I planned and kept cost in mind. I’m proud of it.
I have now worn my wedding lehnga a total of four times in seven years (without repeating it in the same social circle, of course)…and yes, it is extremely extravagant when it comes to embroidery. In fact, I have now decided to alter the outfit so that I can wear it yet again! But 3 of the four times I have not worn the dupatta on my head and this has distinguished me from the bride. (Actually I have toned down on the jewellery each time too, so that has been another distinction.)
I also believe that no matter what her outfit…no matter what her jewellery…regardless of whether it is heavy or light, a dulhan is always the most beautiful woman in the room; she has a glow of happiness and innocence, the glitter of glamour…it comes from inside her and cannot be hidden. So nobody can compete…no matter what they do.
Ultimately what I am trying to say is that there is enough waste in this world with regards to money. Enough people go without clothing. How can we justify buying an outfit for thousands of dollars or rupees and then putting it away? I certainly cannot.
Furthermore, nothing pleases me more than to see someone that has gone full out to dress for an event that I am hosting. It shows me that they have made an effort and have honored me with the time that went into planning what to wear and getting ready.
So any of you coming to events that I am hosting…please DO wear your wedding outfits…AND the jewellery…go ahead, wear the teeka and the jhoomer…I’m sure you will look lovely and I will be delighted to see you all decked out!!!
Live a little folks…and make some room in your hearts.
OMG!!! I totally agree with every single thing you said. I would never want to waste money on my bridal outfit just to wear it one day and then keep it pristine in a box in my closet for it to never see they light of day again. One should wear their wedding dress again but only to their siblings wedding or a close relative. Also, they should never outdo or overpower the bride. If I get married then I will consider wearing my outfit to my brother or cousins wedding BUT..will def tone down on the jewelery and makeup. Theres alot of other things I agree with you on such as…everything you wrote, qoute by quote..lol but its soo true..