I am great fan of Faiz, and love his poetry few days back opened a thread too
but still i would back Ibn-e-insha. He had a novel style and very simplistic way of conveying his thourght into rhythm and free flowing words into poetry.
(^ mistake^ : Read Ka’ran (due to, because of) in the first line)
**Ab Umar ki naqdi khattam hoii..**
Ab Umar ki naqdi khattam hoii
Ab hum ko udhaar ki haajit hei
Hei koi ju saahookaar bannay??
Hei koi ju deevan-haar bannay??
Kuch saal maheenay din logo!
Per sood byaaj ke bin logo!
HaaN apni jaan ke khazaanay se
HaaN ummr ke tosha-khaanay se
Kia koi bi saahookaar nahiN??
Kia koi bi deevan-haar nahiN??
Jab naam udhaar ka aya hei
KiyooN sab nay sarr ko jhukaya hei
Kuch kaam hummeiN niptanay heiN
JInheiN jan-nay wale janeiN heiN
Kuch piyaar dulaar ke dhanday heiN
Kuch jug ke doosray phanday heiN
Hum maaNgtay nahiN hazaar baras
Dus paanch baras du chaar baras
HaaN sood byaaj bi deiN leiN gay
Haan aur kharaaj bi deiN leiN gay
Aasaan banay Dushwaar banay
Per koi tou deevan-haar banay
Tum Kon Tummara naam hei kiya??
Kuch hum se tum ko kaam hei kiya??
KiyooN es majmah meiN aa'yee ho??
Kuch maaNgti ho?? Kuch laa'yee ho??
Yeah karobaar ki baatein heiN
Yeah naqd udhaar ki baateiN heiN
Hum baithay heiN kashkol liay
Sab ummr ki naqdi khattam kiay
Gar sheyr ke rishtay aa'yee ho
Tab samjho jald juddai ho
Ab geet gaya sangeet ga'ya
Haan sheyr ka mausam beet ga'ya
Ab pat-jhaR aa'yee paat girreiN
Kuch subh girreiN kuch raat girreiN
Yeah apnay yaar puraanay heiN
Ek ummr se hum ko janeiN heiN
En sab ke pass hei maal buht
HaaN! ummr ke Mah-o Saal buht
En sub ko hum nay bulaya hei
Aur jhooli ko phaylaya hei
Tum jaao, en se baat kareiN
Hum tum se na mulaqaat kareiN
Kia Paanch Baras??????
Kiya ummr apni ke paanch baras?
Tum jaan ki thailii laa'yee ho??
Kiya pagal ho? soodaii ho?
Jab ummr ka aakhir aata hei
Her din sadiyaaN ban jata hei
Jeenay ki havas hi nirrali hei
Hei kon ju es se khaali hei
Kiya maut se pehlay marna hei?
Tum ko tou buht kuch kerna hei
Phir tum ho hammari kon bhalla?
HaaN tum se hammara kiya Rishta??
Kiya sood byaaj ka Lalich hei?
Kisi aur kharaaj ka laalich hei?
Tum sohni ho, munn mohni ho!
Tum ja ker poori ummr jeeyoo!
Yeah paanch baras yeah chaar baras
Chhin jayeiN tou laggeiN hazar baras
Sub dost ga'ye sub yaar ga'ye
Thay jitnay sahookaar ga'ye
Bus Eik yeah naari bethi hei!
Yeah kon hei?kiya hei? kesi hei?
HaaN ummr hummeiN darkaar bi hei
HaaN jeenay se hummeiN pyaar bi hei
Jab maaNgeiN jeevan ki ghaRiyaaN
"Gustaakh AkhiyaaN kith Ja laRyaaN"
Hum qarz tummeiN lauta deiN gay
Kuch aur bi ghaRyaaN la DeiN gay
Ju Saa'at-o mah-o saal nahiN
Wo ghaRyaaN jin ko zavaal nahiN
Lo Apnay Ji MeiN Utaar Liya
Lo Hum Nay Tum Se Udhaar Liya
Faiz, Jalib and Faraz are cretins when compared to Iqbal.
Myself, and many critics do not agree. Iqbal was not a very versetile poet of urdu, but he was good poet in farsi ( i heard). In urdu he lacked imagination, though there was message and very important message. so he was an important poet. but at the same time he was mostly monotonic. Lack of Iste'ara and Tashbeehat and at time using same tashbeeh many times made him somewhat redundant.
In order to understand Iqbal, a deep knowledge of Quran, Tafseer-ul-Quran, ahaadeeth and Islamic History is necessary... which makes Iqbal the most unique Poet.... He has arguably Urdu's longest Poem in his name "Masjid-e-Qurtuba" ....
He's unmatchable - the problem is - he's hard to understand for many who only admire Ishq-e-Mijaazi..... though he has created gems in that sinf as well..
What about Mad’o Jazar-e-Islam (Musadas-e-hali) :aq:
I thought that is the longest poem in urdu ?
***Yeh Pehla Sabak Tha KITAAB-E-HUDA Ka *** Kay Hai Saari Makhluq Kunba Khuda Ka Wohi Hai Dost KHALIQ-E-Do’Sira Ka Khalaa’iq Say Hai Jis Ko Rishta Vila Ka Yehi Hai Ibaadat Yehi Deen O Emaan’ Kay Kaam Aa’ay Dunya Mein Insan’ kay Insan’
Ubaid-ullah Farooq reads it on fm100 and it last whole month of Ramzan, seems neverending
Not to show disrespect but lack of imagination /vocabulary is pretty evident form this verse, though first line is okey , but second one takes a dip
*pholoon ko aye jis dam, shabnam *wuzu karaney **
*Rona mera *wuzu ho. naala meri dua ho **
He couldn't find a better alternatvie and used wuzu in both lines ? So i Insist.
why need an alternative? Is it really necessary to go about for minimizing redundancy? repeatation sometimes makes a lot of sense and Iqbal's repeatation is unmatchable as well...
let's see what the sher is really saying:
Iqbal is using the metaphor as 'wuzu' of flowers but really look into the next line, he is talking about himself... now stop and think about the time when Shabnam really comes? it comes right in the morning, FAJ'R???? right???
so Iqbal is talking about that time..... and what is Wuzu? something that makes you clean... so what Iqbal is really saying about HIMSELF in the next line and not repeating the first one again but using it as the "timeline" that "rona mera wuzu ho" meaning: I clean my soul everyday by crying infront of my Lord... It wipes out my sins.. what other better alternative you can think of other than wuzu? Please, do tell us :) and I think I do not need to explain "nala meri duaa ho" part as I am sure now you can make sense out of it anyway.
LOL.. so what was madd-o-jazar-e-Islam of Haali? been too long I read it when I was a child:
Pasti kaa koi Hudd saY guzarnaa dekhaY Islam kaa gir kar naa ubharna dekhaY MaanaY naa kabhi kaY ma’d hai har jazar kaY baa’d Dariyaa kaa hamaaraY jo utarnaa dekhaY
Seh'r nay taaray say sunn kar sunaaie shabnam ko
Falak kee baat bataa dee zameeN kay mehramm ko
[/quote]
I have read it many times. It is good poem, I like it.
But still it does not make him the best poet of last century. He lacks the style and ambiance of a great poet. His ideas are sometimes borrowed.
why need an alternative? Is it really necessary to go about for minimizing redundancy? repeatation sometimes makes a lot of sense and Iqbal's repeatation is unmatchable as well...
It depends on the style of poem. repetaion make some poems very beautiful. The best example is sura Rehman. But in this particular case there is not patern of repetation of words in that poem. so it looked odd to see in only in one shair.
I understand the meaning. second line is fine But if you look at first line there was a margin of using alternate words for instance Ghusal i.e
shabnam ghusal karaney
But again I am niether poet nor critic. Just doing what our nation loves to do.. munh maari
It depends on the style of poem. repetaion make some poems very beautiful. The best example is sura Rehman. But in this particular case there is not patern of repetation of words in that poem. so it looked odd to see in only in one shair.
I understand the meaning. second line is fine But if you look at first line there was a margin of using alternate words for instance Ghusal i.e
shabnam ghusal karaney
But again I am niether poet nor critic. Just doing what our nation loves to do.. munh maari
hmmmm... first of all, I am a bit speechless of you bringing Quran in the topic... please, spare a moment and do not compare any poetry with the word of Allah.....
secondly, you missed the point.... ghusul is considered "baRi paaki" (as they say it in books) and by mentioning "baRi paaki" in the first misra', the usefulness of the second becomes very doubtful and hence the whole meaning is lost ...
... thanks for the last comment.... I agree whole heartedly :P
I am not comparing, just giving an example. Where does Allah ask mankind to not appreciate his book ? As far as i know, He insists.
i just gave an example of alternate word, which conveys the meaning. It was upto the poet to choose. which he did not. Hence the criticism. :p
I dunno man.... the way you put the words was like comparing the "redundancy" in the two :)
anyway.... talking of redundancy, how would you rate Iqbal's following poem:
Khudi ka sirr-e-nihaaN La ilaha il Allah
khudi hai tegh-e-fusaaN La ilaha il Allah
Yeh daur apnaY 'Braaheem ki talaash maiN hai
Sanam-kadah hai jahaaN La ilaha il Allah
Kiyaa hai tu naY mataa'-e-ghuroor ka sauda
fareb-e-sood-o-ziyaaN ! La ilaha il Allah
Yeh maal-O-daulat-e-duniya, yeh rishta-O-paivand
bu'taan-e-vehm-o-gumaaN! La ilaha il Allah
Khird huwee hai zamaan-O-makaaN kee zunaari
na hai zamaaN, na makaaN! La ilaha il Allah
Yeh naghma fas'l-e-gul-o-laaleh ka naheeN paabaNd
bahaar ho kaY khizaaN, La ilaha il Allah
AgarchaY bu't haiN jama'at kee aasteenoN maiN
mujhaY hai hukm-e-azaaN, La ilaha il Allah
Myself, and many critics do not agree. Iqbal was not a very versetile poet of urdu, but he was good poet in farsi ( i heard). In urdu he lacked imagination, though there was message and very important message. so he was an important poet. but at the same time he was mostly monotonic. Lack of Iste'ara and Tashbeehat and at time using same tashbeeh many times made him somewhat redundant.
There is nice set patern of Qafia and Radeef. So repetation is inevitable. i have already said that when it is in patern it looks and sound beautiful. Also the use of Zaman-o-makan intelligent and pertinent, unlike the use of wuzu in earlier poem. you know that too ;-)
