so ive just completed my 4th year of university, i have come across many men in my time there and still have a couple of years left to go and my parents are looking for a suitable rishta for me and have given me permission to find someone myself too.
However, i havnt really met anyone at uni, i have alot of male friends, but i wouldnt marry any of them, because i know what kind of things they get upto! and the guys who i do think oh they are ok...all have girlfriends...their girlfriends tend to be beautiful middle eastern girls.
My parents have been looking for my rishta for the past year and have only come across 1 who came to see me!
Neither my parents or I have very high demands, im training to be a doctor so someone of equal educations, from a good family and good balance of east and west...so not clubbing/drinking/string of girlfriends but not taliban either, just moderate.
But for some reason im not having any luck and neither are my parents, my parents are becoming increasingly worried and so am i!
Are we doing something wrong? im trying to work on my self...working out and going to the gym eating well because i feel beauty gives you some choice in life, im not very fair...is that it??
Where can i meet more people....also the boys who come across as decent to me always turn out to be hindu or sikh..sigh...what a flop!!
im just wondering what i can do or what my parents can do?
i know its all a matter of destiny but you cant just sit around all day and do nothing either!
Im really ready for marriage and to settle down i feel like its the right time in my life, im doing dua and inshallah something will come along soon.
But i am getting a bit worried!
There are two conflicting statements in your post, one is that you can not find/meet the right type of person.
but then you are also doubting yourself in ways and talking about trying to get fit and not being fair.
the second part would not matter if the first was not true at all would it?
or what you are not saying is that you have met the type of guys you like but then they were not interested? and/or you are having confidence issues as you do meet guys who meet your requirements?
not trying to beat up on you in any way at all, but tryign to make you think and get a better sense of the situation.
second- is income being equal or more a real deal breaker? that balance can change even in future even if you guys are in the same field. the right guy would not have an issue if his wife earns more.
third- why are guys born abroad out of the question, depending on background and education, there is a huge variance between personalities and outlook.
last- are your friends and cousins etc finding guys? if so, are these guys trolls and u dont like them at all, if not how and where. See what you can absorb from their experiences.
My observation has been that in the same social circles, same community, same khandan and even sometimes the same household one guy or girl will not have any issues finding someone and one does. seen it in my own khandan, what is the reason? think about it