I know why I am not doing it, but I want to know why you did it or want to do it. Many of us choose to find our bride to be in Pakistan or in India, why? is there shortage of Muslim ladies or is it our male chauvinistic mentality that refuses to accept today modern women over a traditional women. Perhaps, we are afraid of competition within our home. If it is not a ego problem than what is it? Oh wait, let’s blame it on the parents, who’s expectation for their daughters does not drop less than Doctor and Engineer and since we all can’t meet such a high standard, we have no choice but to hop on PIA and head down to Pakistan find that innocenct beauty?
not all of us are that bad… there are a lot of desi girls who are both modern and traditional at the same time.. u just gotta find the right balance
i once asked a friend of mine why he would want to go back to pakistan to get married when there were so many desi girls where he lived.. and also cus he had dated so many.. what prompted him to go back..
and he said, its cus whatever “baggage” the girl had (in pakistan) she would leave behind and come and live with him.. if he married a girl from where he was, he’d have to deal with her old boyfriends, or watever.. and he couldnt handle that.. i thought the answer was pretty retarded… but to each their own
I have a friend how tells me that he going to Pak to get married coz he thinks that she will not have such high demands as a girl living here in canada.. she would just stay at home and do his "khidmat" ... i was so upset by this and told him that you should really get a maid not begum coz you are not going to love her you just want a person to take care of you..
I want to love someone not just be with them coz my "khandaan" wants me to.. i want to spend my life with someone who is dear to me.. understands the environment that we are living in and appriciates life for its blessings.. and there are alot of girls here who are like this :) so me not fikaring :)
Thats exactly my point. Some one you can talk to face to face and has the guts to talk back to you looking in the eyes, not some one who bends her/his head for you.
Khair, like Sadzz said, to everyone his/her own.
Just some food for thought…
most of the girls i know back home are extremely high maintenance.. rich larkiyan who have everything done for them.. girls who wont settle for a no and demand attention..
it just depends on who u "click" with.. u get both (several) types everywhere
my bros fiance is from pak (noone ever thought he'd go back) and i personally think shes awesome.. simple, understanding, confident.. and just the type of person he needed...
Not all of us who intend to marry back home do so imagining girls there to be "better".
I plan to do a bride search in Karachi instead because I want my marriage to strengthen my ties to Pakistan - whilst I do think that a girl raised in the West like me would understand me better, I fear that by doing so I'd end up raising a family with weak ties to Pakistan - because if the girl's family doesn't live in Pakistan, and given that my family doesn't live in Pakistan, then there is little family connection remaining to Pakistan.
You just want some rich computer expert as your wife
On a more serious level, connection is what you make of it.
Do you really think you need a wife to tie bonds to a country?
Shouldnt there be other reasons to marry a girl?
Other reasons, such as what? I really don’t believe that any pre-existing attraction or chemistry is a necessary condition at all - instead, the decision to marry an individual should be based on a logical, rather than emotional, analysis of the situation.
Marriage is such an important thing that emotion should never be allowed to blind you to the logic of whether or not it makes sense to marry an individual.
who said anything about pre-existing attraction or chemistry?
Thats what YOU made out of it.
Do you think that by marrying a girl from pakistan you will marry the country?
You have MashALlah a good job, you can find great ladies here aswell, and STILL have enough family in pak. You can even visit pak 3/4 times a year. Like I said, the connection is what YOU make of it.
i agree with dutchie though... the connection is upto u... a person from back there doesnt make ur connection to the country any stronger..
my desiness has nothing to do with my relatives there.. its more to do with how much i value my culture.. how much i believe its a part of me.. if i marry somenoe from here, i doubt im gonna lose that love and connection...
I think if you want to “strengthen” your relationship with Pakistan then move to Pakistan! and live there … don’t marry someone because it will make your relationship with Pakistan better that is total BS…
Most of the girls here do have other family members in Pakistan and if they don’t you can show them what Pakistan is by taking her there and showing around..
A series of casual interviews with my associates who are raised in the west and now married has provided empirical evidence that Pakistanis living int he west who marry Pakistanis from Pakistan generally feel stronger connections to Pakistan than those who marry girls of Pakistani origin in their own country.
This has enabled my logic to come to this conclusion.
The sample size was small, but the ones who were married to girls from Pakistan would go back to Pakistan more often than those who married local girls.
The driving force for their visits to Pakistan tended to be the girl wanting to spend time with her parents and the guy being dragged there in her wake.
Wives who had parents in western countries tended to drag their husbands to Pakistan less.
