Its not only Asians that go abroad to get married…it seems many do…Americans love going to Latin America and marrying that stunning Colombian girl with none of the issues that Western women have blah blah…and the English guy that goes to Taiwan to get his wife that cares about the needs of her husband and doesnt have the materialistic desires that women do in the West etc…
So most of the reason people go abroad from my understanding is due to being cynical about girls here…having had a bad experience ie being cheated on…or just being a big fish in another country ie they couldnt pick up a girl that looked like that in their own country…and mainly they discuss issues that expectations from women in the devloping world are minimal in comparison to the girls in the UK or US where expectations are astronomical…
Firstly wondered if people here agree with that idea…so those that have gone back home or consider it…is it due to any of the reasons outlned?..Is the easy option always the happy option?..
And secondly what i was more curious about is whether the same issues that you had with women in your country become the issues of your wife when they get here…so is that cultured, modest, simple Paki girl you bring back transform herself into the women you hated here?..Do you notice they change for the worse when they get here?..
Cos whenever i looked at these things i always thought those girls would stay simple in their own enviroments cos thats all they know…so if you want to marry them then go back to their country…cos once you bring them back to your own then they just like anybody else get influenced by their now not so simple surroundings…and thats the same for anyone whether its your Paki bride, filipino or brazilian…
i dunno but i think they might learn something new in diff country,may b more bold,more aware of their rights but if by nature they r gud they would remain same.but if some ppl want a paki seedhi sadhee gal to exploit her(jo chahain gay waisa he keray gee)then their expectations could go wrong....
I dont think you can generalize this much about something that varies so greatly from individual to individual. If you go to another country to find a "simple country gal", dont expect that her expectations will always be low. She may just come over here, see all the abundance and become overcome with greed, the way I've seen some desi relatives get when they come over and ask me to take them "shopping". Also, dont expect that all western gals are easy, loose and greedy. I have seen about equal on both sides of the coin so IMO, its an individual thing rather than cultural.
I dont think you can generalize this much about something that varies so greatly from individual to individual. If you go to another country to find a "simple country gal", dont expect that her expectations will always be low. She may just come over here, see all the abundance and become overcome with greed, the way I've seen some desi relatives get when they come over and ask me to take them "shopping". Also, dont expect that all western gals are easy, loose and greedy. I have seen about equal on both sides of the coin so IMO, its an individual thing rather than cultural.
I am a desi and obviously all the married people I know have brought their wives from abroad...
It's hard to say anything about this topic since every individual is different. I have seen some "simple" paki girls raised in pakistan and some very manipulative ones as well. Same with the girls here in the West. To make a statement about this would be a huge generalization....dont u think?
i know girls in Pakistan who are incredibly greedy and manipulative and selfish...and girls here who are very simple and non-threatening... so anyone who goes to another country thinking they'll find only "good" girls there are sorely mistaken...my husband is from canada (by way of bahrain/lahore) but i never looked at where he was raised, or where he lives to measure him...
all i can think of is Eddie Murphy's dvd where he talks about going back to Africa to get Umfoo foo his bare back african. %%%% and she comes here and talks to the other gals and it's suddenly "eddie what have you done for me lately"..
I don't think you can generalize anyways about girls here or there...i honestly really want to say that the guys who go back go back b/c they can't get a girl here and the girls there are thrilled for the opportunity to come here so he gets a "prettier" better girl than he could have here...but then i'm guilty of generalizing too.
This phenomenon is being seen in most places, Europe, States, Arab World and even the poor Afghanistan, where they get married to a girl from tribal area.
The girl from another place is certaily more vulnerable and dependant on husband than a native girl. I wud suppose that chances of such girl being abused will be more than one raised in that particlar area.
It is a generalisation but am i wrong in stating that that is the reason many do go abroad...
Not just desis anyone from the West...normally it is because they are frustrated with girls in the UK, arent earning ridiculous amounts of money to impress families or girls, had bad experiences with girls here, they are unattractive thus incapable, feel western girls are materialistic etc and they assume that girls abroad or so much better...so that girl in Pakistan, Colombia or the Phillipines is untampered by Western greed, has inner beauty, dotes on her husband, will be significantly more attractive...the whole big fish thing they never had back home...
Am i wrong in stating that when men go abroad it is due to disapproval of western women and a 'dream' that everyone outside is going to be perfect?...
And to **Amelie's **point which i agree with is it not careless to expect that girl from the village who was so sweet and all those qualities already mentioned above to remain so when they get here...we are a product of our surroundings after all...a simple girl is only simple because she lives in a simple place...once they leave that simple place they will become just like anyone else no?...
Everyone has an ideal in mind for the type of partner that they want. I dont see any of this "going abroad" to find a wife but I dont have that big a social circle either so it may well be true. I think though, that you just have to look at INDIVIDUALs rather than current background. I dont know how comfortable I'd be to bring a "simple" gal into a "complex" society. I;m sure it works sometimes and fails sometimes, in much the same way as love marriages or arranged marriages do. All depends on the dedication of both partners and how well they fit together and are willing to work together.
The biggest problem that I'd worry over is not one of where they grew up but that of what they are accustomed to. Some desi gals grow up over there with servants, maids, cooks and drivers. Lovely as that life is, and lovely as those gals may be, I just cant see how they'd cope over here. No maids, no household help, no driver. Clean, cook, do laundry, do marketing all by yourself. In addition, cost of living here is so high that many/most require two incomes so wife MUST work if you aspire to ownership of that house with a white picket fence. WIll SHE want all this? Will husband? It takes two and it takes partnership.
"Marketing" is going to the grocery store. A task looked upon by most as a necessary evil.
"Shopping" however is a fun, happy activity where you spend lotsa money on fun things like pretty red stilettos that you MAY wear once.
I go marketing often. I havent been shopping since cant remember when lol!
"Marketing Gurus" have the task of turning that "necessary evil" into a FUN activity. Or to make the shopping an even happier, funner activity than it already is.....
^ a chav is a british term the white middle class use to describe the usually poor, track suit/fake gold wearing white youths who hang on street corners/walk the street..................also known in the U.S as 'white trash' only they live in council estates rather than trailer parks.