Re: when rishta comes…
Whats the difference genius?
Most people dont marry within their social circles…they marry either in family or outside of their social circles. When you get a bahir ka rishta…people you dont know…what else would you do? Why dont I see any logic in your post? I think you live in a small town or something in Pakistan…you know those place where everyone knows everyone on every gali and nukkar. So this may not apply to you.
Im not even going to address the male-owning-land and girl-being-virgin bit because I want to believe you were joking…for your sake.
The thing Ive noticed in educated families is honesty and the willingness to be as open as possible. So maybe the people you’re associating with dont care very much where their kids end up - hence no need to find out about prospective families. In more decent families, people try to keep the lines of communication open and do everything to reassure parents that their daughters will be well taken care of. This is called sharafat and class. They value their daughters too and try to understand.
In uneducated families, they dont care much and do a very careless little question-answer (nowadays called brief and discreet) session…like giving away a stray pet…as long as the prospective owner looks like he is wearing clean clothes and shaved this morning…its a GO!