hi there,
i was thinking abt asking some personal questions to the guy by the girl’s father like
asking to show his bank statement
asking to show his degrees
his salary slips etc…
is it appropriate???
Re: when rishta comes...
Nope not at all. That is just a money grubbing family.
Re: when rishta comes...
Yes.
Father of girl CAN ask or try to find out other ways indirectly.
A background check from his friends/relatives/work place etc. is also appropriate.
Re: when rishta comes...
Asking for bank statement is a bit much IMHO.
Here is what I dont think is wrong to ask:
Degree/transcripts
Naturalization/citizenship/residency papers
Proof of employment of some sort
Doing a background check is perfectly legitimate also.
I dont think its about the money at all...its about how many people actually try to fake their way through the process by just talking big.
Re: when rishta comes...
yes, and don't forget lung x-ray and ecg report.
Re: when rishta comes...
And sperm count.
Dental record.
VD test.
Recent Vision check.
Police record.
Driving record.
etc.
Re: when rishta comes...
Asking for bank statement is a bit much IMHO.
Here is what I dont think is wrong to ask:
Degree/transcripts Naturalization/citizenship/residency papers Proof of employment of some sort
Doing a background check is perfectly legitimate also.
I completely agree with the above.
In addition, if the girl's family is askiing for proof of education/employment/immigration status.....then the girl's family should be willing to show the same documents to the guy's side.
Re: when rishta comes…
You’d be surprised at the extent to which families will go to make their sons appear like they’re the best thing since sliced bread. One family told us their son was 12 credits away from his Masters when he had nothing close to even a Bachelors. 
Its not a bad thing necessarily until people begin to lie about it.
Re: when rishta comes...
I completely agree with the above.
In addition, if the girl's family is askiing for proof of education/employment/immigration status.....then the girl's family should be willing to show the same documents to the guy's side.
Absolutely.
Re: when rishta comes…
True but there are ‘other’ ways of doing background checks. Considering how efficient we can be, if asked directly, we can come up with something convincing easily. 
Re: when rishta comes…
There should not be ANY such lie in these matters.
Education.
Job.
Overall Health.
Financial stability.
Character.
I know a girl was suffering with psychologic disease and guy family did not know. He lives with borderline psycho. With his good nature, he accpeted her as wife and has two beautiful boys who he is raising along with mentally ill wife. He gets frustrated but does not want to leave her, lest she will have no place to live or company.
Re: when rishta comes...
bank statements???
Are you marrying the guy or his money?
Re: when rishta comes...
Asking for bank statement is a bit much IMHO.
Here is what I dont think is wrong to ask:
Degree/transcripts Naturalization/citizenship/residency papers Proof of employment of some sort
Doing a background check is perfectly legitimate also.
I dont think its about the money at all...its about how many people actually try to fake their way through the process by just talking big.
hmmm, that right, but what if the guy is having his own business, how we'r gonna chek his aprox income /month?
Re: when rishta comes...
hmmm, that right, but what if the guy is having his own business, how we'r gonna chek his aprox income /month?
After asking the questions, can you please post back here and tell us the questions you asked the guy? I just want to know for future reference when my sisters start getting rishtas, lol!
Re: when rishta comes...
hmmm, that right, but what if the guy is having his own business, how we'r gonna chek his aprox income /month?
What income range is acceptable for you? WHat is he makes in 3 digits but loses his job after getting married and has no job for an year or even more....would you leave him?
Re: when rishta comes...
And sperm count.
Dental record.
VD test.
Recent Vision check.
Police record.
Driving record.
etc.
lolz... if i wud be a afather of girl, i'll chek it all for deffo... cannont trust n ruin my girl's life just on the basis of fake talks..
my frnd;'s sis got married to a guy who was not a man basically, after wedding she find out this thing, and they give her a hard time giving divorce , but now she is married to another decent person Alhamdulillah...All i wanted to say is how ppl go so selfish and ruin girls life just for their own wills... how sick ppl are...:s
Re: when rishta comes...
....my frnd;'s sis got married to a guy who was not a man basically........
but he had a nice fat bank statement?
Re: when rishta comes...
one of my frnd, designer having his own business. wen he was going through all this rishta process, he said to the girl's family that he wont tell his income to anyone, even his family doesnt know it, but he decently to showd his bank statements to the girl's father in order to satisfy .... in this way ppl shud behave, if girl's parents culdnt ask for these stuff due to some pressures, ppl shud show it themselves and gain the confidence
its not abt the money only, its all abt trusting and gaining the confidence level from both sides.
Re: when rishta comes...
but he had a nice fat bank statement?
bank balance is just for the matter of financial stability
Re: when rishta comes...
hi there,
i was thinking abt asking some personal questions to the guy by the girl's father like
asking to show his bank statement asking to show his degrees his salary slips etc...
is it appropriate????
Not appropriate.
Making sure he has a decent job to support himself & his future family should be good enough, as you will always get whats in your kismat. A guy having money doesnt always mean its yours & vice versa.
He may have loads of it now, but may lose it somehow, or worse he has it but doesnt let you spend a penny out of it ( have seen a few such cases) so rest assured & pray for a blessed furture :)