When Muslim Men Can't Even...

Lifestyle Relationships
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Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

Look, in my opinion he was tactless and somewhat disrespectful. Whether he knew the effects of his statements, I don't know. I would at least think twice before rejecting someone in that manner.

I'm glad I asked indeed, because that whole semester I would see him every day, and frankly it was really getting in the way of my studies. That semester...lets see, I had 4 main classes that I was worried about - one in which I had a C, another basically an F, another a B, and another bordering B/A.

I asked him out in the very beginning of April I think. And by mid-may the finals were over for the classes.

I asked him out - he rejected me - I think I cried that first night because I felt like I had been scolded by an uncle or something - then the next day I pulled my act together in my classes, and didn't pay him anymore attention.

I ended up with 2 A's and 2 A-'s in those 4 classes. I don't know how the hell I pulled up my grades, really, except with God's help.

And yes, so I am very much happy and secure that I did ask him out. I care more about my grades than some do takhay ka chutia.

102

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

Fita, then was the Prophet insecure? Because Khadija proposed to Mohammed (S) and he accepted?

:)

best way to tell her its over
103

Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

As I just said insecurity has nothing to do with it.

LAST GOOD MEAL
104

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

I'm sorry. Then I guess you don't have much respect for Khadija (R)?

105

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

PCG will you go out with me?

We can be e-partners.

106

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

no thanks. answer my question.

Congrats Kamran......(merged)
107

Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

Will read up and see if this is true.

Then maybe I’ll swallow my pride and change my way of thinking. Haha

108

Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

:rolleyes:

Its common knowledge she proposed to him. But okay - look it up.

109

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

PCG give the guy the link to this thread. His ego will reach the roof. :D

precious khan k liye rishta.....
110

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

Hey, you may not believe it, but even men can be wrong sometimes.

By the way I didn't appreciate the way you so callously rebuffed my proposal.

Congrats Kamran......(merged)
111

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

I hope that SOB is reading this, MQ. I did mention the site once to one of his friends. I hope the news spread like girly gossip. (this group of boys does gossip a great deal, surprisingly).

Fita: You disrespected me. I ain't doin' nothing with you. :)

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Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

NAHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

cue sad Indian song

Congrats Kamran......(merged)
113

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

and Shahrukh Khan dances in, running towards Fita to kiss him

*yawn*
114

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

I love happy endings.

interesting!!!
115

Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

Did someone say Shahruk Khan???? Where?? Huh??

116

Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

Honestly pcg for all we know he might even like you , and want somehing of it, but that initial first approach was not to his liking ! You mentioned he was religious, so maybe he though you shouldnt have gone up and asked him to the movies. But Im sure hes over that now. He probably didnt say salaam/hi for your sake. Maybe he thought he was also rude, and best pretend nothing happened, instead of making you feel weird. If he had said something, you might have wondered what he wanted this time after he declined your first invitation.

Freedom of Expression
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Re: When Muslim Men Can't Even...

^ all that because of a "hi"?

Desis overanalyze a lot, na?

118

Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

well thank goodness, your book is not universal truth but just “your book”?/

As far as know, niether of you said hello, u waited for him. why? why not say hello yourself?

And whatever the reason is of him not liking you, thats his choice. How he chose to display it, agree or not, like it or not is HIS approach, not some standard muslim guy approach.

Well since you are talking about it from a ** fellow muslim** perspective, then, yes, salam should have been said, however since he was there and you arrived, the person arriving is the one who needs to say salam first. Which if i recall your post right, is something you did not do..being upset at his mannerisms, you chose to ignore your religious obligation to say salam to him.

A Muslim must respond to the greetings of everyone who greets him/her, as Allah commands us and says in Surah An-Nisa - 4:86: "When you are greeted with a greeting, greet in return with what is better than it, or (at least) return it equally. Certainly, Allah is Ever a Careful Account Taker of all things.

To avoid confusion in future and to aid you in fulfiling your islamic duties as well as reminding others who do not. I am posting a few items on the topic of the etiquettes of greetings.

That person is nearest to Allah Ta’âla who utters the salâm first. (i.e. one who does not wait for the opposite party to make salâm first.

Greet every Muslim, whether acquainted or not. (Bukhari)

Salâm should always be made before talking. (Tirmidhi)

A mounted person should greet the one who is walking, and a person on foot should greet the one who is sitting; a smaller group should greet a larger group and the young should greet their elders. (Bukhari)

When entering a house, make salâm to the occupants of that house.

When leaving that place (i.e. house), depart with making salâm (Baihaqi)

When entering ones own house, one should make salâm to ones family; this will be a source of blessings for one and one’s family. (Tirmidhi)

Hopefully if i ever ignore a hi from you, it will not result in long posts extrapolating your experience with one person to group of hundreds of millions :slight_smile:

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Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

I extrapolate not because of this one experience. I have already said that I have seen it with most other desi muslim guys. This is simply one example to illustrate my point.

If others have turned the topic into analyzing what went wrong with PCG’s relationship with this guy - that’s not my problem. I’ve already clearly stated what the intended topic of the post is.

Although, thanks for posting up the religious rhetoric. I hope people read it and try to apply it.

And like I said, I would absolutely have said Hi to him. I actually have most times after the rejection incident from last year. But each time I’ve been the one to say it first, although he sees me. And this isn’t the first time he’s avoided me either. There was once when he got onto the train - I was sitting, and he was standing :hoonh: - and he actually glanced at me, got this panicked look and sat on the other end of the training actually facing AWAY from me! I didn’t even have time to open my mouth before he darted to the other side.

Same thing this time - I would have said hello had he not turned his face away. And frankly, I was with a visiting group taking an inventory from another office. So I couldn’t really dilly-dally much with him while my group was walking away. And certainly, since he’s done this before and repeatedly, I was really disgusted with him as well.

The guy has made it clear that he doesn’t want to say hi. The topic is that this is something I’ve seen not only with him but most other guys. So yes. Its a generalization. And a justified one based on my experience.

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Re: When Muslim Men Can’t Even…

Damn right! It really doesn’t hurt much to say hello. This guy at work pisses me off, because he never says hi to me but he talks to everybody else. :grumpy: