Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
last thing on my list is 'what ppl care'
social means the affects it'll have on her generations to come..
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
My imam once said a beautiful thing tht stuck by me and no matter how much the dynamics of the world changes this remains true.. when a woman learns something she passes it to her generations..so when u have a choice to educate someone in ur family a girl or a boy...chose a gurl cuz she is the future and her knowledge will spread faster than a man's..
if im not rong similar is also in Quran..following this theory be it good habits/ bad habits it applies..if a woman has a bad habit it'll spread in her coming generations.
A man is usually outside for work tht is why he may or not expose alot of his bad habits to his kids while a woman nurtures her kids and family, a kid will immediately pick up on bad breath, cig in her purse or even seeing her smoke at home..
Think of urself as a smoking mother for a sec and think isn't it worse...its not sexist, its a fact!
That's a nice sentiment that you have, but what makes you think the child will not pick on the fact that mom is condoning dad's smoking/bad habits because he is a man? You think children don't learn from that? Why do you think boys from the average desi family often have double standards ingrained in their mind set? Because that's what they grew up watching. Kids really do see how their parents behave, even subtle behaviors...they don't have to smell smoke on their dad.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
im sorry but thts a complete diffrent topic althogether..
i know a frnds mom used to tell her husband tht after dinner pls pick up his own plate and keep it in the sink while my other frnds mom used to pick their husbands plates my the first one always was against it and they would fight cuz he saw it as an insult and disrespect... my friend learnt from her mum (i duno if its right or rong, no position to comment) and asks her guy to do the same..
(stupid example from my side)
a husband and wife will always bicker and argue abt stuff..thts human and an issue in many families (which definitely affects upbringing) but thts a different social issue
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
im sorry but thts a complete diffrent topic althogether..
i know a frnds mom used to tell her husband tht after dinner pls pick up his own plate and keep it in the sink while my other frnds mom used to pick their husbands plates my the first one always was against it and they would fight cuz he saw it as an insult and disrespect... my friend learnt from her mum (i duno if its right or rong, no position to comment) and asks her guy to do the same..
(stupid example from my side)
a husband and wife will always bicker and argue abt stuff..thts human and an issue in many families (which definitely affects upbringing) but thts a different social issue
maybe im being really dumb ( sorry if i am) but i dont get your point?
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
You cant seem to wrap arnd it cuz Mashallah ur mum is a nice women
A mother who is a gambler or smoker etc definitely has more impact on a child than a father in a similar situation..i cn make u understand the dynamics why but needs loads of typing..id leave the topic here :)
thnks for ur 2cents
I'd expect that a gambling smoking mother and a gambling smoking father would both have a negative effect on children. Both should be frowned upon. Both of them are supposed to be raising their children. Both of them are meant to be role-models for their children.* Both* of them contribute to the family dynamic and both of their behaviours determine whether their family is functional or dysfunctional. A smoking father is a pretty poor role-model for his children. A smoking mother-likewise.
I do agree though that the mother would probably have a slightly more significant effect on her children.
Smoking should be frowned upon regardless of the sex of the person who is smoking.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
I'd expect that a gambling smoking mother and a gambling smoking father would both have a negative effect on children. Both should be frowned upon. Both of them are supposed to be raising their children. Both of them are meant to be role-models for their children.* Both* of them contribute to the family dynamic and both of their behaviours determine whether their family is functional or dysfunctional. A smoking father is a pretty poor role-model for his children. A smoking mother-likewise.
I do agree though that the mother would probably have a slightly more significant effect on her children.
Smoking should be frowned upon regardless of the sex of the person who is smoking.
EXACTLY MY POINT AND MY MSG ONLY IS:
Smoking should be frowned upon regardless of the sex of the person who is smoking
but
The mother would probably have a slightly more significant effect on her children.
Thanks :)
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
People.
Cutegurl might be right in asserting that a mother has more influence over her childen.
The Mother gives birth to the kids and a mother is the nurturer...so biologically she has more connection..this connection could possibly then also wean into a closer pschological and emotional connection with the mother than the father...
A wise person also told me that to judge the personality of a girl (for instance regarding a rista)...her mother is the first thing to look at.
This is just a guess...if it makes sense
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
^ It is not always the case. I am much much much closer to my dad compared to my mother and I am much more similar to him.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
…Inspiron, i meant it in terms of your personality and principles..
They would be similar to your mother
otherwise..i guess this theory is only a theory amongt the many..
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
What a strange turn this thread has taken. Personal attacks n whatnot. All CG is saying is that smoking is more harmful to women which it is. Try doing a bit of research before telling her off 
It has been shown by numerous scientific studies that women are more susceptible to the harmful effects of smoking than men. A decrease in life expectancy is higher in women than in men due to smoking. And I’m not going to bother going into detail about the estrogen levels, bone density, lipo-proteins etc. Use google if you care.
Ofcourse it is well understood that if you smoke during pregnancy, your baby is smoking too but why are we neglecting the other female bodily functions that are affected by smoking such as the menstrual cycle, menopause, fertility?
Even if smoking was equally harmful for both men and women, since when did one wrong justify another? No need to go all feminazi and say why women can’t smoke because men do too.
CG, when I said petty, I meant smoking really is a small issue in the larger scheme of things in Pakistan right now. So I don’t really care, to be honest, unless someone close to me is getting addicted to smoking. What others choose to do is none of my concern, I’m sure they can all read the “smoking kills” warnings.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
i wish to have such a chain smoker friend 
** men & women are equal so no more attack on ladies please :cobra: ***
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
I dont deny inspiron but SOCIALLY it's worse for women thn men!
secondally WHEN and HOW did this issue like some other petty issue?? WHY isn't it being thought upon seriously..
Maybe its being taken seriously because of hte ridiculous notion that smoking cigarettes is somehow on par with having affairs.....?
Also because its NOT a gender issue, its a health issue, just like some people choose to eat unhealthy food or don't exercise, smoking is a health choice.
Yes a person (not just women but men too) should not smoke. But then we should all follow healthy diets, indulge only occasionally, take our vitamins and exercise, but not everyone does all of that do they?
If you want to talk about social issues, then yes, drugs and alcohol are a serious social and health issue but don't you dare try to tie smoking a cigarette with a person's morals and boundaries of decency....because as you know, everyone has different boundaries.
And like someone else said, it's a silly assumption that only the mother has an affect on a child's moral upbringing. Mothers and fathers BOTH have equal bearing on how a child turns out.
Even if smoking was equally harmful for both men and women, since when did one wrong justify another? No need to go all feminazi and say why women can't smoke because men do too.
I didn't see anybody saying that women should also be allowed to smoke. But yes, if arguing that
- a woman who smokes does NOT have affairs and
- does not mean she is morally bankrupt and
- that we don't agree with the concept that only a mother is responsible for a child's moral upbringing (and therefore she is under more criticism and scrutiny) IS sexist and outdated.....then yes, I guess you could say that's being a feminazi.
When you unload all the responsibility of raising a child with morals and values on the mother's shoulders, it puts her under far more scrutiny and susceptible to criticism than whats fair and what she deserves. and frankly, I don't believe that all the man has to do is provide financially. he has responsibilities too.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
Her life, her health, her choices but I'd like to see Pakistani women rebel against the bigger matters such as equal employment opportunities than the petty matters such as not wearing a dupatta or smoking.
CG This is why I "liked" BarbieCue's post. Don't know what needs to be expanded because her point is pretty clear.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
No, smoking has nothing to do with being morally bankrupt but if we're speaking about Pakistani women, I think it is safe to say that they're a little more liberal than the average Pakistani girl. As I said, this liberal attitude could be used for better purposes.
As for the mother being responsible for a child's upbringing, again we're speaking about Pakistani families and we all know how much desi men get involved in nurturing the kids. What you're speaking of would be the ideal situation and it does exist in many modern day households. But in the majority of desi families, the mother does have a greater (not sole) responsibility towards the children (in terms of discipline) than the father. I remember reading "a dumb woman raises dumb children" somewhere in life1 recently. This is not to say smokers are dumb but that the majority of posters agree that a mother's behaviour will have a huge effect on the child especially if the child is at home all day with the mother and not the father.
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
At a very young age when they're spending much more time at home obviously they're more likely to pick up on mum's behaviours and habits but as they actually get older towards and into their teenage years wouldn't the sons be more likely to copy their dads?? It's like those men you hear about who think it's ok to beat their wives as they saw their own fathers doing it..
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
Forget smoking,
What's this trend with drinking?
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
^ What I thought when I read the post. We all know some people drink but it's always been behind closed doors, now it's completely socially acceptable to have wine at weddings and parties, it's really weird!
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
^ wait.......Just because they drink don't mean they are of looooose character???
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
equal rights....
Re: Whats this new trend of pakistani women smoking?
^ wait.......Just because they drink don't mean they are of looooose character???
If you are looking at it from an Islamic pov, then smoking and drinking cannot be compared. One is not haram, the other is.