Re: What would you do?
Thank-you :halo:
People that consider themselves Brand New compared to Divorced People who are Phatay Puranay…I am sure they’ve been conditioned to believe that its perfectly okay to have this type of mentality.
You know its one thing to have your preferences but its another thing entirely to think you’re a cut above the rest for having those preferences.
That IS jihalat.
It’s just like saying two things like suppose apples and mangoes dont go well together but that doesnt make either of them superior?! maybe a bad example but just trying to say that i no way think a divorced person is beyond my level but maybe just not compaitable with me. If that makes any sense…
Divorce is not a desease definitely. However, I believe there is a lot of adjustment need to be done by both spouses as they start a new life. Adjusting to each other’s routines, each others families, etc. If one of the spouses was divorced, I wonder this topic would ever NOT come up between their discussions (or whenever they have fight).
Besides its the fear which is associated with divorced person which bothers me most. If I knew the person previously and he would have proposed me (and I knew about all the conditions which he had been through), may be I would consider the proposal. But in the arranged marriage settings, when a rishta wali aunty brings you a proposal of “innocent divorced guy”, it just freaks me out. How does anyone know if he was innocent or not. We cannot even get to know the story of the ex-wife. So in my view, such marriage is a big risk in an arranged setting.
This is definitely not the case in love marriage setting and if a person likes a person, he should go for it irrespestive of his past, cast etc. So may be the view of not marrying a divorced guy is more based on my situation of arranged marriages.
I also dislike the attitude of families of divorced guys who do not think that their son is divorced and still have long list of criteria when selecting their bahus. I have heard about many families looking for never married girls for their divorced and not willing to consider a divorced/ widowed girl which is sick.
This :k: