What to wear?

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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Re: What to wear?

I said this earlier but my take on it is that u can look good in both english and asian clothes. U dont have to wear asian clothes to have a huge signboard on u saying "look at me im asian and ethnic". U can look sophisticated and elegant in western clothes as well seeing as it is an american wedding. I agree with SGC u dont want to take attention off the bride even if it isnt intentional-its her big day.

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  1. People are so focused on taking attention away from the bride…it would take a hell of a lot (like someone showing up to a desi wedding with a dupatta pinned to their head or someone showing up in a white/ivory gown to a western wedding) to draw attention away.

And just as an aside…there were a couple of unmarried cousins in my in-laws that showed up to a wedding with lehngas and dupattas pinned to their heads…they did it because normally they were scarves and to go without would have been wrong. Even they were ostracised by us for doing this. We told them that instead of pinning the matching dupattas to their heads they should have worn a scarf in matching colour or something. So let me be clear that when I suggest eastern attire, I am not in any way suggesting that you take the pleasure of being the bride away from her.

  1. In response to:

Please explain where I have said that. I have repeatedly said that you should not wear what the bride is going to wear…not even the same colour.
It’s more silly to selectively draw conclusions without being able to support them. :rolleyes:

  1. I have been to enough weddings…both eastern and western…to know that when western people wear desi clothes, the majority of the time, they are not doing it to “blend in” or “show respect”. While these may be by-product results of their actions, they are usually doing it because our clothing is so glamourous, fancy and exotic that they thrill in being able to dress in it. It turns into a “fancy dress ball” where they are able to live out a fantasy, of sorts. (Remember that I said “the majority of the time”; not always.)

Finally…just as many of my non-desi friends have been keen to borrow/buy articles of eastern clothing to wear to our events, there are those of our community that would see a western event as an opportunity to put on something that we don’t often get to wear. If that is the reason behind your desire to dress up in a dress or skirt or gown, then by all means, indulge yourself! Just don’t use “I don’t want to upstage the bride”, or “It would be disrespectful for me to attract attention on her special day”, etc. as excuses because that is all they are.

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i have to agree with muzna, most of the americans girls who’ve shown up at desi events wearing sarees/shalwar qameez, it’s coz they’re fascinated by eastern clothes, have bought em and were waiting for an occasion to wear 'em.

as long as you don’t wear white/cream (western attire) or gaudy/heavy desi kapray, you’re not likely to take attention from the bride. the last western wedding i went to, i wore a formal (western) suit to the church function, and shalwar qameez for the evening reception.

as for pics, here’s the dress i wore to the reception: http://sila.com/product_detail1.asp?SID=1&menuNav=1&Product_ID=22&Category_ID=2#

hahahahahahhaahah
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ohh its so pretty :love:

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i double checked the thread…there is not one place where i said those things…the only thing i said was k i dont want to stand out…meaning i dont want plp to stare at me for watever reason…there is not one place where i even mentioned the word BRIDE…so chill pls i will say it again…NOT EVERYONE THINKS LIKE YOU…for u its just excuses but maybe for others it their choice of dressing…

you are older than me so i respect your opinion and i promise i will try my best to put a eastern touch to my western kaprey…lol…actually after your lecture i might i mean i might change my idea of wearing western kaprey…now im more confuseddddd…:naraz: phir soch mein paring:halo:

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thanks guppans…you guys rock…:smooth:

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i think these cute especially the ones with cardigans kind of things…like i dont want to show skin u know…but again im still lookin looking and these dresses are tooo expensive i mean commonnnn i dont want to spend $200-$300 on a freakin dress that i will wear once or the most twice…hmmmmm…

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Re: What to wear?

Shikra, u owe Muzna .. :sara:

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lol…yaar i dont think k meinay kuch bura kaha hai :bummer:…liken if u say so…

Muzna :hugz:..sorry agar aap nay mind kia…i was just expressing my opinion:bummer:

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Exactly,
At my school some of my colleagues also asked me about Sari and the way to wear it. It's a primary single culutre/faith school that's why even students are more keen to learn about asian culture and other faiths. Now I'm planning to buy a Sari to take it to the school and teach them how to wear it. (I don’t have a Sari). Moreover, as in my class we are covering "Hinduism” and when we discussed about Indian dresses, students were also very keen to participate. I’m also planning to teach them how to apply Mehndi. I think if I got Sari I can do a lesson on it in the class as well:) . (Good idea, Thanks to Muzna).

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Sure, I’ll give Muzna jee a hug anytime :wink: :hugz:

Somegroovychick You wanna hear my lame excuse for not wearing shalwar kameez myself? :smiley: Well, it only has one pocket and I have to carry my wallet, cell phone, and car keys with me and when I put all those in one picket, my kameez hangs on one side and it is very annoying. I do understand that sometimes girls just feel odd wearing shalwar kameez at non-desi occasions, and I understand it because I wouldn’t do it myself. So something I wouldn’t do myself, it is wrong of me to expect that from my wife, or any girl.

I suggested that I would prefer saari or shalwar kameez on her, but if she doesn’t feel comfortable wearing it, that’s her choice because I don’t want to force it on her and spoil her mood for the event :slight_smile:

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Well i mentioned this to my hubz cos hes English and i wondered what he thought being white and he said ABSOLUTELY NOT if its an English/White wedding. He said unless if u wear shalwar kameezes everyday and every1 knows that abt u then it shouldnt b done. He said if theres a whole possee off asian ppl going and they’re all wearing asian clothes then u can get away with it but if ur the only 1 then it will end up taking attention off the bride. I thought id ask him being English and what the etiquette is for an English wedding(in the UK) and that was what he said.:halo:

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awwwwww…isnt he the greatesht hubby…issi lyay i love him so muchhhhhhh:kiss::hugz:

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hahaha, mr. shikra, you just scored some points for yourself there! ;)

amani, i hear ya! and the other thing is, if you don't wear it daily, why pull it out for special occassions only? what is it, a fancy dress party? no, its a wedding. i don't wear shalwar kameez much- maybe on eid and pakistani weddings that come along once or twice a year, but thats about it, so maybe thats why i find it so odd that everyone gets so hot and bothered about culture and tradition, but don't really follow thru on it in everyday life. do other people here who live outside of pakistan where sk on a regular basis?

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I rarely wear shalwar kameezes. For me personally they’re not practical in what i do(can u imagine me turning up to teach a class at the gym wearing shalwar kameez?:phati: ).
Hubz doesnt mind me wearing them but they’re not very practical for me.
Only on special occasions and eid do i wear shalwar kameez.

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Personally, I would love the opportunity to dress up in western clothes. It's not like you get to wear a nice dress all the time! It will probably be one of the few occasions.

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i love white people's weddings! i can't wait to wear a dress and a hat!!!!!

Khan Defeats Malignaggi..
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thats british goras :p
canadian goras are much more laid back! but damn, those hats are so pretty!

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Yaar…you didn’t say anything bad. In fact, when I wrote that post I didn’t even have you, specifically, in mind. I was being very general.

Aur main nay kuch bhi mind nahin kiya. How can I? Itnay pyaray shikray ki itni pyaari shikree can do no wrong.

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^ Shoo shweet :blush: