What to do?

Look, regardless of whether other females are soft-petaling their remarks or not, you just said it yourself: you've put up with so much BS over the last 8 years. And you're not even married yet! Imagine how issues will multiply when you have to share home, body, and soul with someone.

Too many girls have this sick emotional codependence---they see themselves as martyrs (oh, I did so much for him, I put up with so much, etc., etc.) Is it not crystal clear that this is not the foundation of a healthy relationship?

Dump him.