My husband is kanjoos in many matters, even in small things, but when there is a need to spend on himself, he spends. When I work I have money in my hand and no worries, in fact he wants me to contribute too for the household expenditures. I just dont understand he does not spend his money on me except if there is somting veryyyyyyyyyyyyy important and when I have my own he complains that i give it to my mother and spend it on myself and dont save. He considers me very lavish and I consider him kanjoos, We ofter fight over this.
ahhhhhhh I am tired. Some serious suggestions please.
You both need to be on the same page, it seems like it is not just the money issues. In a marriage there is no your's or mine. It's ours.
Sit yourselves down together one night. Set a monthly budget aside for the following and stick to it. Live by cash only so you know exactly where the money is going. Clip coupons if you can. Hope this helps.
Groceries
Household items
Transportation/Gas/Patrol
Clothing
Entertainment
Re: What to do? - Seeking Relationship Advice - Finances
I'm going to start out by saying that he** should be giving you pocket money for yourself or atleast **offering pocket money even if he knows you work. You are HIS responsibility after marriage as it is hisduty to provide for the household both typically and religiously. But if you're willingly putting in your efforts, that doesn't mean he backs out on you thinking that you are capable of taking care of yourself.
Like Royal Gala said, make a list of all bills, and expenditures and make a proportion for **yourself **in the list. Seriously, he's behaving selfishly. Just because you work doesn't mean your necessities should be neglected in such a way.
Sit down and talk to him about this. Tell him you're both in it together and ask him to stop fussing over money issues. Let him know that the generosity of a husband who spends money on family, commensurates the benevolence of a donor who donates to charity. Plus, since he's not giving you money to begin with, it's none of his business to wonder whether or not you're spending on your mother or anyone else. And tell him if your salary contributes to the household **finances, then his salary better contribute to **your needs.
Some of these men exploit the innocence of a woman. These wimps need a real piece.
Have a joint account along with accounts that are separate. 70 percent of both incomes should come to joint account. It does not matter who is earning or who is earning how much. Contribution should be percent based.
Rest you guys can spend on yourselves or give to your families.
Re: What to do? - Seeking Relationship Advice - Finances
Why don't you be clever and spend money but don't tell anyone. Women at my work are always buying BAGS filled with shoes and clothes and hide it at work they never let their husbands find out.
Re: What to do? - Seeking Relationship Advice - Finances
And then the hubbies who would never notice ur new shoes and bags/haircuts suddenly turn into the most attentive hubbies on earth when u wear all that secretly stashed shopping.
Re: What to do? - Seeking Relationship Advice - Finances
I have recently met a couple, Husband loves buying branded perfumes, watches, clothes. Even if he don’t necessitate them , He just buy it to show off people around him.
On the other hand, he does not spend a penny on his wife. Lately his wife was diagnosed with fibroids in uterus, she was in extreme pain. But cruel husband didn’t bothered to take her to hospital just because he wasn’t keen on spending money on her.
He sends her to Pakistan, So that wife parents spend her money on treatment. She is still in Pakistan with surgery.
Husband has not so far spent a single penny from last 4 months. Do not bother to send money for her daily expense even.
Wife is struggling with infertility issues; husband has clearly back off spending money. He want wife parents bear the expense.
