Re: What qualifies someone as an ABCD?
I dont see it as a derogatory term. I have confessed openly about the C bit being a very real issue.. we use BBCD’s here in the UK !
I think oneof the posters above has said it very rightly , the confusion begins when you have lived in multiple cultures and then also trying to fit into Islamic parameters .. all this can seriously screw up the mind !
I personally came to a conclusion, after years of confusion that cultures should never be followed, as a muslim, I find all my answer in Islam now. At least the feeling of “being lost” is much lesser now !
For those who dont understand the confusion part .. look at it this way, relatives and parents from a different culture expect us to behave and think in a certain manner. Our friends from a different culture expect us to think like them. Islam goes completely in a different direction .. what are you to do? you dont want your parents to feel let down, dont want to let down your friends, dont also want to cross islamic limits .. its nearly impossible to get all the three onboard at the same time !!! i have tried and failed miserably at it …
It might work , if for example one has an easy going family and spouse who dont care much for cultural or religious stuff. you just live a life with mediocre values .. that way you feel so much at ease and not confused at all!
In this context I feel FOB’s are way better then us confused lot ! they can fully well associate with one culture and are only struggling on one front : adopting the new culture. unlike us, who are fighting on multiple fronts !
The thing is that most people don’t consider it confusing. They choose to make their identity a mix of their heritage and the place where they are born/raised. Nothing confusing about that. Although some people are genuinely confused.